Really over it

[Andre_P]

Hey everyone. Really doing it hard ay. Was on medication to sleep and it made my ocd worse in the day. Tried to get off and my insomnia is worse than ever.

arrg honestly I’m tired but I can’t sleep. I put on a good front but I’m seriously over fighting all the time. I’m strong but I’m getting tired to be honest.

this all started from been woken up by bloody dogs in QLD. Now I have a reasonably quiet place but I am now unable to sleep. Typical lack of sleep led to mental illness and a phobia and this is leading to further lack of sleep.

honestly ay 😕

[CalmCat]

Hi Andre_P,

Thanks for such a vulnerable and open post.

I used to battle insomnia from anxiety and wouldn't wish it on a worst enemy, so I'm sorry to hear your going through these sleep time troubles.

Sounds like you've heard about sleep hygiene before, but sleep hygiene and plenty of exercise is the secrets - I can't stress how important getting 10,000 steps a day is! Its a game changer with sleep.

Wish you the best of luck! I'll be thinking of you.

Regards,

D

[Andre_P]

To be honest I’m getting worse and slowly losing it ay. Just had an outburst then. I dunno how much longer I can take this.

I really am trying my best, it’s starting to really bloody annoy me.

Sometimes I feel like it’s me vs the world. This insomnia is getting worse and it’s taking it’s toll on my physical health too.

The only reason I try to get off the tablets is cuz of side effects and dependence but unfortunately I’ll have to take half a tab tonight or I’ll end up suicidal at this rate. This is getting ridiculous.

[Sophie_M]

We're so sorry to hear how much you're struggling at the moment, it sounds really overwhelming and intense. Please know that you do not have to be alone in these difficult moments. If you feel it could be helpful, speaking with a counsellor from Lifeline (13 11 14) or Suicide Call Back Service (1300 659 467) might offer some small amount of comfort, especially if sleep has become an impossible task. 

[Andre_P]

The thing is all I wanted was sleep. It started with lack of sleep about 15 - 18 months ago. I don’t want money, I don’t want fancy stuff, I just want sleep. Now I have the quieter room (sound proofing) in a different house but because of the chronic lack of sleep I developed a phobia which then lead to this disorder etc and now I’m unable to sleep. Arrg it’s frustrating. I’ll be fine taking this half tab but I really wanted to get off these things ay. Looks like I don’t have a choice.

[tranzcrybe]

Hi Andre_P,

I agree with you, pills can overcome your state of consciousness but not resolve your desire for (natural) sleep.

Anxiety arising from whether you will succeed is having the opposite effect and perpetuating the cycle. In the absolute silence of your room, your mind may be spinning out of control with alertness (striving to hear something).

Trying to distract yourself from these thoughts may reduce your struggle. Although contrary to finding silence, have you considered switching on overnight 'talk back' radio (not too loud but discernible)? Then focus on staying awake (!) by following the mindless prattle that goes on - you may find it irritating at first as you may feel the sound is contrary to your objective, but at least you will be resting if not sleeping initially.

Regards,

t.

[Andre_P]

Far out man I still can’t sleep. This is taking its toll on me ay. I’m getting physically sick too now and I’m not far away from not wanting to be here anymore. I can’t deal with this sh*t. Why won’t the effin body and mind just sleep. I don’t know how much more I can take. I haven’t slept properly in 3 days.

losing it 😕

[Andre_P]

Every time I do try and sleep I get a sudden shock of jumpy ness and wake myself up. My nervous system is shot. I’m tired though why the heck can’t I sleep. This is completely mental. I don’t even know if I can wait for the GP appointment tomorrow. Arrrg

[Sophie_M]

Hi Andre,

We're so sorry to hear how exhausted you are. We know sleep plays an important role in our mental and physical wellbeing. You might find some of the tips in this article helpful: https://coronavirus.beyondblue.org.au/managing-my-daily-life/coping-with-isolation-and-being-at-home/tips-for-getting-a-good-nights-sleep.html?gclid=CjwKCAiAn7L-BRBbEiwAl9UtkBLeLvLnDkhD-cJIupsy8QLWaVtimMBHW0Iupk9025T3BnC-JYkDZRoCPTgQAvD_BwE

Please don't hesitate to reach out to the qualified mental health professionals at our Support Service who are available all day every day on 1300 22 4636.

Please check in and let us know how you're getting on whenever you feel up to it.

[Andre_P]

Thanks. I’ve tried all that. I don’t even watch tv etc. The radio thing may work focusing on something but stuff like that will more than likely just keep me awake.

It’s really frustrating cuz I’m soo tired but can’t sleep. I don’t even feel like me anymore.