Pregnancy and anxiety

[Oliver2023]

Hi All. 

Im currently happily married with my partner. She really wants kids and we have just found out we are pregnant. It’s been a difficult process for this eventuating for us as unfortunately I’m pedophobic (fear of children). It’s something I’ve had for as long as I can remember which I have comfortably managed up until this point. Originally my partner wanted three kids and honestly still does, but understands that this is something I most likely can not provide. 

Since we have found out my anxiety levels have gone through the roof. I’m a fit guy, train everyday, work full time and study full time. I’ve been finding myself physically sick from my levels of anxiety that I’m struggling to eat, protein shakes seem to be sustaining me at the moment. I hoping someone else has been through this very unique situation that can give some advice on methods to help me cope and improve the quality of life for my partner, future child, and myself. 

[Sophie_M]

Hi Oliver2023,

Thank you for having the strength to share your feelings openly here, it sounds like you've been going through a difficult time and experiencing a lot of anxiety. We are sure our lovely community will have some words of wisdom but until then we wanted to welcome you to the forums and provide some support.

Anxiety can often cause uncomfortable and unpleasant physical sensations but there are ways to manage these symptoms, including mindfulness and different relaxation techniques. Have you ever spoken to someone about this? Often a GP can steer you in the right direction or provide a referral to a psychologist who can give you strategies to manage your anxiety and provide long-term support during the pregnancy and beyond.

https://www.beyondblue.org.au/mental-health/anxiety?gclid=Cj0KCQiA6vaqBhCbARIsACF9M6lbHn56RgpuLjMiym...

Just letting you know that we are always here to listen as well on 1300 22 4636, we're available 24/7 by phone or through a range of online options https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support it can be helpful to have someone to help to ground you especially in those moments of panic.

Thank you again for sharing and please know that you are not alone with these feelings, the fact that you are seeking help shows that you have the wellbeing of your partner and future child in mind, that shows great strength.

Kind Regards,

Sophie M
 

[Oliver2023]

Hi Sophie. 

Thank you for responding. Yes I have been in contact with psychologists for the last several years on this issue which has helped me in a public sense. I feel my biggest issue now is my safe space which was home will no longer be there. In discussing my issues with friends family ect and even partner to a lesser extent, people don’t seem to comprehend how difficult this is for me as to everyone else kids are the most amazing/best thing in life. Through my sessions I’ve come to the realisation that’s it’s ok that I’m not ok with kids, but now with the eventuating situation external actors are placing me under pressure to be something I know I can not be.