Overwhelmed

[_bookworm_]

Hi everyone, I don’t know if this will help but I feel like I need to get this off my chest.. 

I am in my 20s and I feel overwhelmed and anxious all the time, I don’t know what to do. I have talked to a professional a couple of years ago after a panic attack (never had one before) but her advice was not helpful and it’s just getting worse. I have been feeling ill lately, I’ve seen my GP about it and she did a heap of test that came back ‘unremarkable’. It’s been 2 or 3 months and she is out of tests to run on me so I keep feeling sick. I am wondering if it is my anxiety that’s causing the issues and if it is I feel like there is no hope of getting better. On top of that I feel undervalued and not challenged at work but I am too worried to talk to my manager. I struggle falling asleep every night and wake up a lot too. I have chronic headaches that have been more like migraines lately. I feel tired and unmotivated and things that I used to like don’t seem enjoyable anymore. I thought about going to my GP to get a mental health care plan but I am so worried about the cost involved with all of that and also don’t believe it would help anyway. I get too emotional most of the time and feel like I’m either really happy or really sad. I don’t like to leave my house alone so I never do anything when my fiancé is at work, I don’t have any friends and I don’t talk to my family as much as I should but I have nothing to talk about so I don’t want to bother them. I don’t know what to do and I feel like I’m venting too much.

[therising]

The warmest of welcomes to you 🙂

Better out than in, when it comes to venting. Not good to keep all that stuff in. Sounds like you're facing a lot of challenges all rolled into one. Breaking things down into individual challenges, where some can be perhaps linked

1. I feel overwhelmed and anxious all the time. To be constantly in a state of mental and physical stress/hyperactivity
2. I don’t know what to do. Feeling completely lost with a lack of direction and constructive vision
   
3. I have talked to a professional a couple of years ago after a panic attack (never had one before) but her advice was not helpful and it’s just getting worse. A lack of effective guidance
4. I have been feeling ill lately, I’ve seen my GP about it and she did a heap of test that came back ‘unremarkable’. Finding no answers, leading to a sense of frustration amongst other things
5. I am wondering if it is my anxiety that’s causing the issues and if it is I feel like there is no hope of getting better. Being left to wonder alone while feeling a sense of hopelessness
6. On top of that I feel undervalued and not challenged at work. A lack of a sense of achievement (aka 'a lack of mental, physical/chemical and soulful stimulation')
7. I am too worried to talk to my manager. Lack of confidence and perhaps a sense of dread or fear
8. I struggle falling asleep every night and wake up a lot too. A serious lack of good quality sleep definitely comes with side effects. Sleep deprivation is still used as a form of torture in some parts of the world and for good reason
9. I have chronic headaches that have been more like migraines lately. Migraines can have side effects too. Personally, I'm a gal who used to suffer from 'silent migraines' (migraines without headaches) that would mess with my nervous system something shocking
10. I feel tired and unmotivated and things that I used to like don’t seem enjoyable anymore. Trying to function with next to no energy ('flat battery' mode) can feel impossible and depressing. Can be hard to feel energy in motion (emotion) when there's not a lot of it there to start with
    
11. I thought about going to my GP to get a mental health care plan but I am so worried about the cost involved with all of that. Financial worry
12. I get too emotional most of the time and feel like I’m either really happy or really sad. Complex emotional challenges
13. I don’t like to leave my house alone so I never do anything when my fiancé is at work. Perhaps a loss of a sense of independence or confidence 
14. I don’t have any friends and I don’t talk to my family as much as I should. Can be really really hard to function and develop without a good circle of people around us, the kinds of people who are going to lead us through the darker or more confusing parts of our path in life. Can also involve people who are going to help us develop in new ways while leading us to find the best in our self (some facets or aspects of our self that we never knew existed)

Breaking it all down, you gotta give yourself a massive amount of credit. These are just some of the challenges you've mentioned. Doesn't include all the other challenges you haven't mentioned. So, 14 or more individual challenges is a heck of a lot to be managing on your own.

I think being sensitive or being in a more sensitive state than usual can make things even more challenging. When being sensitive means we can sense more or sense more easily, the question becomes 'What am I actually sensing?'. Some emotions and challenges can be far harder to get a better sense of than others, that's for sure. You sound like an incredibly conscious person, being able to get a sense of so much. Sometimes I've found a part of the problem involves people around me not being able to help me come to my senses even more. For example, while you can easily sense your debilitating lack of energy, no one's been able to sense and reveal to you exactly what's led you to feel it.