New to all this and want help

[56degree]

Well, not really.

I have always been a worrier (about money, family, whatever) but after caring for my terminally ill father last year, I worried myself sick about an early death.  Ironically, the symptoms (abdominal pain, constipation, fatigue etc.) were much the same as my father’s in the early stage of his cancer.  So no prizes for guessing what I thought was wrong with me.

After some even more scary tests cleared me of anything like that, I still worry incessantly about early death and what that would mean for my family.  I keep thinking that I have only a little time left.  Every time I see something on the tv about cancer or anything like that I start worrying again.

Despite some help thanks to psyllium husk, I still get intermittent abdominal pain and bowel trouble (which I now recognise is caused by worry) together with headaches, difficulty concentrating, dry mouth and intermittent pins and needles and hand tremor.  All this perpetuates the worry and assumption of early death. 

I look at the spots and moles on my face and think I have skin cancer, even though two doctors have cleared me of that.  I am booked in to see a dermatologist in April.  Hopefully that will help.

I wake at about 2am every morning and think about what symptoms I have.  If I happen to have none, my worrying soon sets them off and I get very little sleep.
 
I recognise that my fears are irrational, but that doesn’t stop the fear. 

The psych my GP has referred me to tells me to write down my worry and deal with it at a certain time every day, but I just can’t switch off.  Has anyone been through this and beat it?  If so, what did you do and how long did it take?

[Zeal]

Hi 56degree,

I’m also a worrier, though I have improved since my teens. It’s great that you cared for your ill father. :) Your anxiety has understandably worsened since the height of your father’s illness and his passing. I am fairly sure you have Health Anxiety. Your bodily symptoms (as you have astutely pointed out), are caused by your anxiety. Once the symptoms themselves are present, the anxiety kicks in even more. Therefore, this is a vicious cycle which can be hard to break. With the help of a psychologist, you will hopefully see some improvements in your anxiety.

Avoid searching online for information about medical conditions. The sheer quantity of medical and health-related websites available is overwhelming. Also, some of these sites are not accurate. Looking at these websites will only increase your anxiety. Your doctor is the best source of medical information. Also, current affairs programs can also be unhelpful for people with anxiety. These programs tend to sensationalise things and use dramatic images to gain the public’s attention.

I used to get headaches and have poor concentration due to my anxiety. It’s frustrating. If you are sitting at a desk, try to be aware of your posture and the tension of your muscles from time to time. If you feel that your body is becoming tense, try pretending that your head is hanging from a string. With this in mind, sit up straight with your spine in the centre of your chair, and let your shoulders drop downwards, slacken your jaw muscles, and release any other muscle tension you become aware of.

With regards to sleep, here are some tips that could help. Avoid caffeine after 4pm; try putting drops of lavender oil on your pillow; ensure your bedroom is not too hot or too cold; don’t have a heavy meal soon before going to bed; foods such as bananas, wholegrain carbs, cherries, and nuts are good before-bed snacks; try switching off technology about an hour before you go to bed (or even just half an hour); and try writing down your thoughts to free yourself of them before heading to bed. You can throw away the piece of paper afterwards. If you have jobs or errands that need doing for the next day, write a list to keep. This way, you won’t have to worry about forgetting things when you are trying to sleep.

Good luck with overcoming your anxiety.  

Take care,

SM

[56degree]

Thanks SM

I agree that online searching doesn't help me..  I seem to stumble across other horrid diseases that I think I might have that concern me.  I have tried to cut that out.

Thanks for the tip on headaches.  I will try that as unfortunately I am one of those chained to a desk for most of the day.  I would rather deal with these things naturally rather than with pills (which don't seem to help the anxiety headaches anyway)

It is surprising how often in the course of a day you hear or read the word 'cancer' without looking for it though.  Yesterday I counted 34 separate instances in between TV, radio, overheard conversation and whatever else. 

On my psychologists advice I have tried to put in action a risk assessment based approach to this - in terms of what is the actual likelihood of me getting sick, and what can I do about it, which sort of helps.

The middle of the night is the hardest time.  Getting to sleep hasn't been too difficult of late - probably due to a days worth of mental fatigue - only to wake a few hours later and eventually worry myself into a panic attack which leads to more physical problems.  As you say, it is a vicious cycle.

Cheers mate

[Chris_B]

Hi 56degree,

You might want to take a look at this thread here which came up about a month ago. "Health anxiety" as you are experiencing seems to be something quite commonly experienced by our forum visitors - if you search for "health anxiety" in the search box at the top you'll (hopefully!) bring up about dozen threads, which should have some reassuring insights for you, at least to know you're not alone in this.

[56degree]

Thanks Chris

While I wouldn't wish this on anyone, it is good to read that I am not alone in this.  A lot of the thoughts and symptoms listed there match exactly what I have been going through for the last three or four months.

I hope that recognising that my mind can have all of these weird effects on my body will eventually help me to feel like the person I was before all this started, even if it does take time.

Thanks again

[MarkBt]

 56degree I am so with you at the moment. Part of the reason I have signed up to this forum is that I have been having health anxiety at the moment. I was recently sick three times in three weeks, all different things and probably only related by stress on the immune system but I always feel there is an underyling horror story. I had fevers on and off, so I was checking my temperature every night and any variation I'd become anxious about. I'm on medication for anxiety so I can occasionally get enough clear head space to see it for what it is - anxiety. I had decided that I would stop taking my temperature and only take it if I felt undeniably ill. Its been almost 4 weeks since I was last ill and I feek ok. I am just trying to cope with anxiety but I am determined to move forward as I have two young kids (which probably explains the illnesses). I have not found a sensible way of dealing with the anxiety yet but am determined to focus on life and good health and trying to live instead of doing what I usually do and be too busy worrying to live my life. I have to say I have considered seeing a psychologist again but at the moment I am finding the forward momentum enough to keep mentally healthy. On the balance I know it is unlikely there is anything seriously wrong deep down but what can I do when I know my internal dialogue is playing tricks on me and my mind jumps to conclusions. I have stopped looking at web-md and googling medical symptoms. If you followed any of the symptoms you could go from a stuffy nose to having HIV. it just doesn't make sense without the context.

 All this came about because two years ago I had fevers for two weeks and the doc had been testing for lymphoma, of course it turned out to be a nasty virus. As an anxious person that sent me into a tail spin but I resolved to move on and I did. I feel better for sharing and I hope you do too, anxiety is a strange beast.

[56degree]

Thanks for sharing your story with me. I have to say I have been able to make some progress in the last few days learning that I am not alone. The crappy thoughts still won't stop but I am starting to learn how to cut most of them off and not dwell on them till I get to the catastrophic outcome.

 Be nice when the physical symptoms stop, but I guess I have to master my thoughts before getting there.