Losing control

[LulaBean]

Hi all,

I'm a bit new to this, so not exactly sure how it works. I'm feeling like I'm really losing control at the moment. I'm partway through a medical degree and I'm not coping with the stress very well. It sounds normal but the longer the course goes on, the worse my anxiety gets. Everyone says that the more exposure you get to stressful things the better you cope with it, but I find the opposite is true. Things that I could do easily a few months ago, are now causing me a lot of stress. I often leave uni in tears. I also feel like I can't talk to my uni friends about it cos they all seem so competent compared to me, and not as stressed out. 

I also feel like the stress is spilling over into every aspect of my life. I'm eating badly and not exercising, and I'm also struggling financially, so it feels like I've got no control over any part of my life. Often at the end of the day I just wanna go home and watch tv and binge on junk food. I also don't feel like socialising any more and I'm just in a bad mood all the time. I feel like I've lost control cos I'm not coping with my anxiety as well as I was a few months ago, I just keep eating badly and I can't get the motivation to do any exercise or even do hobbies that I used to find fun. Everyday I say to myself that I'm going to get on top of things, but the day always ends the same way, with me feeling hopeless and anxious, and doing nothing all evening. I feel like it's all spinning out of control and no part of my life is the way I want it to be.

I'd really like some tips on how to get back some control in my life. Does anyone have any suggestions?

[Pixie15]

Hi LulaBean,

Unfortunately, I know how it is easy to get caught up in the negative activities which supply a quick but short term fix. A psychology teacher I had suggested studies have shown that students who journal cope better. 

There is a website "thedesk" which has some useful tools for helping to manage time, diet, relationships etc. 

You might also want to check out what counselling services you have available on campus.

Grateful.

[AGrace]

Hi Lulabean,

I think you've made two really brave steps. 1. You have an incredible awareness of your current situation, and 2. You have come to a really good place to get some support.

It sounds like you may have developed a little bit of anxiety around your studies, and then when this filtered into a number of aspects of your life, there was a greater level of anxiety around losing control. The fact that you haven't been able to apply a quick fix has probably meant that anxiety has led into some symptoms of depression. So how you feel at the moment is pretty normal for someone who is suffering from both anxiety and depression.

My strongest piece of advice would be to speak to the student counsellor at uni, or to see your GP and get a referral to a Psychologist/Counsellor. It sounds like you need some strategies to help you regain a sense of control, but also to accept that you won't always have control over every situation life has to throw at you. A good Counsellor or Psychologist will be able to help you devise some of these strategies.

In the interim you may like to have a look at a couple of other threads which have some suggestions for managing anxiety and depression.

SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING ANXIETY under the anxiety section of the forums.

SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION under the depression section.

I hope that this is useful, and I hope we will hear back from you.

AGrace

[LulaBean]

Hi Grateful,

I've had a quick look at "thedesk" and I can see it might be helpful. Thanks for the tip

LulaBean