Lonely

[greatoutdoors123]

Hi guys. I am really struggling with loneliness at the moment. I live interstate and moved here 2 years ago in my own for work. Because of covid I don’t get to visit home very often now. I’ve always been really proud of the fact I can live away from home and do fine but lately I haven’t been doing fine. I feel ashamed and embarrassed that I don’t have a group of friends here (I have accumulated friends but it’s not a whole ‘team’ so to speak). I spend a lot of time alone and each weekend if one of my few friends is busy then I spend more time alone. I’m embarrassed by this and feel like I’m wasting my youth in a way. Lately it’s getting a bit much and I have been very teary. Can anyone relate?

[Katyonthehamsterwheel]

Hey there

Im really tired but I want to answer your post because I was just tonight reading a post on Facebook where a famous food blogger admitted during an interview that she doesn’t have any friends, and so many people in the comments were saying the same. People of all ages and in all situations. It’s probably actually quite common but people feel like they can’t talk about it as though it’s some kind of personal failing, which it’s not. People live busy disconnected lives and it’s not easy to make friends.

That being said, loneliness isn’t a nice feeling, and I’m sorry you’re feeling down. What sort of things do you like to do? Are they any sports or interest groups you could join in? It might be nice to have something to look forward to even if your friends are busy, and bonus, you might meet other people.

Katy

[Tia_T]

Yes I can relate. However, I am in the opposite position where my family and friends are close by but I feel very disconnected. One thing I know that has helped is my pet dog. It’s the best feeling coming home from a not so good day at work and being greeted by your dog when you come home. I feel so loved and not so much alone. I tend to go for walks with my dog and socialise with other dog owners. I hope that my story helps you and you can find some connections.

[David_C1]

Hey. I certainly wouldn't feel ashamed of not having lots of friends. Most young people who have 'lots' of friends have 'built up' these friends from school which takes many years. Sounds like you've done very well in getting friends. I guess that since they are not around all the time and because you spend a lot of time by yourself that it seems that you don't have a lot of friends. Like Tia T suggested a little doggy or pussy cat would help, plus there are lots of sporting teams like indoor Volleyball, tennis, Tenpin bowling, Amateur theatre, netball, online dating plus many other clubs that will not only make you socialize but increase your 'feel good' hormones. Plus there is nothing wrong with going back to your home town. I moved interstate and it took me years to feel contented in my new area.

I hope this helps,

Cheers David.C1