Last Straw

[SickOfIt]

Hi Everyone, I am 40 years old and have suffered from anxiety since I was about 6 years of age. Back in the 80's no one understood anxiety so no one understood me. I have suffered through this alone due to shame. I am on medication and have seen a few psychologists. My anxiety has stopped me from soooo much. I am so sick of it ruining my life!!! I am trying to plan a wedding I don't even know I can go through with and I desperately want to have a baby without causing it harm from my panic attack episodes. I tried to slowly wean off the medication so that I could try for a healthy baby and I just couldn't do it. My anxiety has skyrocketed so I was put back on it. I've booked myself in to see another psychologist. I am at my wits end and don't know what to do anymore. Any advice would be appreciated and I would love to hear how you got through your wedding and pregnancy too. Much appreciated xx

[Petal22]

Hi SickOflt,

Wellcome to our forums!

Im sorry you are feeling this way I understand.

I suffered with severe anxiety OCD it was horrible I have now recovered thanks to the professional help I received.

Have you ever been diagnosed with anything in particular?

Have you thought about doing a therapy for your anxiety?

Im glad you have found a medication that helps you……. I understand when wanting to fall pregnant and not be on medication.

Have you been able to speak to your gp about this, I’m sure they have ways of being on medication while pregnant……. Have a chat to them……

I know anxiety can be very debilitating at times and I’m sorry it has stopped you from doing things you want to do.

One thing I learned with anxiety was not to do what it is telling you to do because it only reinforces it.

Try to go against your anxiety you are so much stronger than it!

Your not alone

[geoff]

Hello SickOfIt, I'm really sorry you are feeling this way and know that it's such a concern for you, not only to get married but to also have a baby because your life changes and we always hope for the best.

It's such a huge commitment but if anxiety is holding everything back, then perhaps you need to take your doctor's advice and if they say it would be a good idea to begin taking them again, you have to learn from the experience your doctor has and understand the problem.

I'm not a doctor qualified to say but know from what I've been told over the years, that something as important as this needs to be controlled by not only medication but counselling to be able to overcome this feeling.

Suffering from anxiety and wanting to have a baby needs to be understood and you need to know of any consequences that may arise once you have a little one to look after, because your life will change.

It's good you are already aware of this and seeking out a new psychologist and I'm sure you will be a terrific wife and definitely a great mum, but please contact your doctor.

All the best.

Geoff.

[SickOfIt]

Hi Petal, Thank you so much for your response. Can I ask what do you mean by therapy for my anxiety? I am willing to try anything. I can't take this much longer. You can only be strong for a certain amount of time before giving up. Did you see a psychologist or psychiatrist to help you overcome your anxiety? This is the 3rd psychologist I will see and I'm still a mess.

[SickOfIt]

Hi Geoff, Thank you so much for your comment and kind words. Have you successfully overcome your anxiety? I have little faith that a psychologist will help me overcome this as none have before. I feel like my life is going round in circles and when something new or exciting enters my anxiety wakes up to stop it from happening. I don't want to live this way any longer.

[Petal22]

Hi SickOFlt,

I was diagnosed with OCD by a psychiatrist this then led me to a clinic that specialised in OCD….. I did metacognitive therapy this was an 8 week therapy and gave me all the tools I needed to master my OCD.

I was stuck in a vicious OCD cycle and I learned how to break free of it.

My therapy was run by trainees at a university and over seen by a doctor.

If seeing a psychologist ensure you see a clinical psychologist…….. a clinical psychologist can diagnose a normal psychologist can’t.

With the anxiety you have can you tell me anything in particular you do when you have this anxiety?

When you saw previous psychologists were they helpful with strategies for your anxiety?

[SickOfIt]

Hi Petal22,

The first psychologist I saw was great she helped me by giving me strategies to cope when I have panic attacks and so forth but sadly she then went on maternity leave and I was never able to get an appointment with her. The other 2 were useless they just let me ramble on and did very little to help.

My anxiety is at its peak when something new happens. My brain loves routine but hates change. It could be as minor as getting a pet that will spike my anxiety from 20% to 100%. You can imagine my brain right now with a wedding looming and me wanting to have a baby.

When I'm anxious I can't do much, I get very tired, become very jittery and shakey and nauseous to the point of dry retching. I try to distract myself by thinking of the beach/ocean, I pray alot and I play online games. Depending on the severity it doesn't always work.

[Petal22]

Hi SickOflt,

Im sorry that two of your psychologists haven’t been helpful.

When you do see another phycologist maybe ask them if they can offer you some therapy so you can learn how to manage your anxiety. I did metacognitive therapy another therapy is CBT.

If you find your anxiety is severe I’d recommend going back to your gp and letting them know.

Have you ever tried meditation? When I started doing meditation it really helped me with my anxiety it taught me that I’m not my thoughts but the watcher of my thoughts.

Have you tried to practice mindfulness?

Practice slowing down your breathing.

I understand anxiety is difficult to deal with just hang in there.