Intrusive thoughts about Trump

[Looking_within]

My family got together for the first time in months and somehow the discussion led to the US Elections. I was horrified to hear that both my parents and brother and sister in law like Trump. It might not seem like a big deal but I really don’t like Trump. He is a trigger for me as it brings up a past cult like traumatic event that led to my breakdown. I have spent countless hours discussing this with my psych and how there are a lot of common personality & behavioural characteristics between Trump and the cult leader - the narcissism, bullying, labelling anyone who disagrees with him as crazy or fake, etc. The thing that has me up at midnight is that I didn’t realise that people so close to me, who I thought I knew well, could buy into Trump’s lies. I don’t have a problem with the Republican Party. It is the people who are blindly supporting Trump that bother me so much. To hear my brother talking about how it is terrible about all of the “illegal votes” that got counted and how mail in ballots are illegal and that Biden is completely incompetent because of his age stuns me. Well, that didn’t stun me so much as when I asked what evidence there was to any of these things and the reply I got was that there is no way the most popular president could lose to Biden and lots of other statements made by Trump and his supporters all without any credible evidence. I feel like whatever happened to critical thinking?? It scares me that so many people (like my family) take Trump’s word over evidence and logic, claiming that he is the most powerful man in the world so he wouldn’t lie about these things. Maybe I am just being too sensitive? The hard part is that my family see it as me who has been fooled by the media into developing a skewed opinion of Trump. I just don’t understand 😞
 I wonder whatever happened to the days when it used to be a case of ‘agree to disagree’ about politics? How has it become that one group of people believe that anyone who doesn’t agree with them are crazy left wing radicals? Watching the post election news and hearing reporters talk to people who voted for Trump actually made me feel a bit optimistic when several of the people made comments that they don’t like Trump but align with the Republican Party and I remember one lady said she thinks that Trump is “morally reprehensible” yet feels his party’s policies are best for the country. That I can understand and I don’t have a problem with. I am just getting so stuck on the idea that a person in such a position of power has a cult like following. Why don’t people do their own research and come to their conclusions? Why do they take this narcissist’s word as gospel? I just keep imagining all crazy scenarios in my head and replaying what happened to me years ago wondering if somehow I was wrong and the cult behaviour was right. I am so glad I don’t live in the US. The division among people scares me. I feel as though so many people have been brainwashed into a cult type of following and what is to stop something like that happening to me again.

[therising]

Hi Looking within

It sounds like you have graduated through your experiences to point of seriously questioning all that you find questionable.

I've found, graduating to a point in life where both wonder and questioning play a major role does come with challenges. While a large portion of the people you know can believe in something, you question it, which can have you labelled as 'foolish' or 'difficult'. It is definitely challenging when the majority agree, leaving you as the odd one out. The challenge is to maintain your stand but with an open mind, open enough to recognise reasonable points they have to offer. If nothing appears reasonable...well...there's nothing to change your mind.

As mentioned, wonder becomes part of this graduation process. You can begin to wonder why everyone else agrees with each other, 'I wonder why so many people love this man'. I've actually asked myself this question at times, about Trump. I believe, in some ways, he holds traits we would love to find in our self. Such traits may be

• The ability to hold fast to something we believe in
• The ability to call people out on things, without giving it a 2nd thought
• The ability to not care so much about what people say
• The ability to express our confidence without fear

The list goes on. He has some incredible abilities, I'll give him that but he also holds some highly questionable behaviour. He has a history of serving himself, more often than not, disregarding the feelings of others, having a closed mind when it perhaps needs to be more open at times and he can be thoroughly degrading and humiliating in the way he manipulates. I mentioned to someone not too long ago that I believe him to be somewhat of a sociopath. This led me to wonder whether he has 'grounding' people around him. If he didn't have such people, he may not be able to see reason for modifying some of his ways. Imagine if such people weren't in his life. While Trump has done a handful of truly amazing things while he's been in power, personally I would not choose him as a leader. An inspirational leader is more my cup of tea, someone who brings out the best in people.

You mention 'Maybe I'm being too sensitive'. I believe sensitivity to be an incredible ability. Insensitivity can leave us not questioning the questionable behaviour of others, when we should be questioning. If something feels off or wrong, such as narcissistic behaviour, you'll easily sense it (being so sensitive). Others simply won't question it.

🙂