I think I have Body Dismorphia how do i get help when im afraid to leave the house.

[KTKat92]

After my partner cheated on me a few years ago, i have become very insecure about how i look. Mainly because i was told by him that he cheated because i got fat. Its gotten to a stage where i am to scared to leave my house because i am afraid of how people will judge me seeing me in public. After having my first child i am the heaviest i have ever been in my life. Everytime i step on the scales i have a complete meltdown. Everytime we are ment to go to some kid of social event i am crying in my room because everything i put on makes me look fat or makes me feel disgusting. I constantly buy clothes and makeup trying to make myself feel better but it never works. Im constantly dieting or not eating and then crying myself to sleep when i have given in a binged. I hate that i dont have beautiful long hair like some girls. That i dont have a beautiful white straight smile. I consider myself hideous and no matter what people say thry dont change my mind. I cant see it when they say ive lost weighy or thay i have nice skin or they think my hairs pretty. As far as im concerned nothing i do is good enough.

Anyway my main question here is im terriefied to go to my doctors about it. I dont like waiting in surgeries i get very anxious and antsy. And to be honest everyday when i have to get dressed and leave the house im crying cause i fear judgement from other people. So how can i bet help when im scared of people and judgement as well as leaving the safety of my home. Im also afraid of being pushed aside on this being told theres nothing wrong im just being silly.

[Peppermintbach]

Hi KTKat,

I feel your partner’s words and cheating have clearly had an enormous effect on your self esteem. To have been told that it was your weight that was the reason for his cheating would have really, really hurt...

I sense so much self loathing in your words. It must be so painful to look in the mirror and struggle with your own reflection...

I’m glad you’re considering reaching out to a doctor for help. I feel that’s a very courageous first step. Well done 🙂

I get what you’re saying about how getting dressed and leaving the house, etc is very stressful, nerve racking and upsetting for you. So, just as a gentle suggestion, I wonder if you might like to see if there is a doctor who makes home visits. Do you think perhaps that would suit you more?

Also, if you haven’t heard of them before, you might be interested in looking up a not-for-profit eating disorder and body image organisation called The Butterfly Foundation online. They are nationally renowned and offer a range of services including a support groups, National helpline, etc. It’s totally up to you so no pressure but maybe you could consider giving them a call to see what suggestions they have for you.

Anyway, I’m merely sharing my thoughts and suggestions. My ideas may or may not suit you but I still wanted to share them anyway...I hope that’s okay with you...

If you feel up to it, it would be great to hear from you again as we would like to continue supporting you. That being said, there’s no pressure or rush to reply...just when and if you’re good and ready, and only if you feel comfortable doing so 🙂

Kind and caring thoughts,

Pepper