I Need Some Advice.

bb1988 · ‎27-03-2014

Hello all,

I just wanted to start a thread to talk about my own personal dealings with anxiety and ask some questions.

Firstly, I have been looking at this forum and so many people seem to have figured out exactly what kind of anxiety they have but for me, it seems to be all over the place. I cannot pinpoint a time, place or activity that provokes anxious thoughts for me. My anxiety seems to appear out of the blue but it is becoming more and more prevalent in my life. Also, for me, it does not have many physical attributes like tight chest, sweating etc...it feels like it's literally all in my head. Thoughts racing around, inability to focus on the logical/positive side of things. I guess my biggest concern is that my anxiety seems to come from nowhere and be about nothing, if that makes sense. Either that or it's about different things every time - one time it could be money, another time I am panicking because my friend hasn't texted me back (sounds so silly, I know!).

I have tried meditating, exercising - and they do help short term but my mind seems to take over soon afterwards and I am back to square one.

I am 25yrs old, male and gay. I do feel that I have some issues with my sexuality that have not been dealt with but I don't believe that is the real issue here. As much as I was bullied (like most gay teenagers)...and this MAY have had a longlasting effect, I truly don't know if that's it. My family is accepting of me and we (for the most part) have a good relationship.

I do get extreme anxiety with anything to do with medical issues - particularly when it comes to sexual health. I have read that fear of diagnosis of medical issues can be a trigger for anxiety and I definitely suffer from this. I guess as a gay man, there are always higher risks of sexually transmitted diseases etc and this causes me a lot of stress (even though I always practice safe sex....!!) But i guess that's the definition of anxiety, because I know everything should be fine but I will convince myself it isn't.

Besides that, I study which actually doesn't seem to cause too much stress, and work a part time job which causes me no stress or anxiety at all.

So basically I am just looking for some advice...I don't even know what about...and that is the problem. I cannot put into words how I feel but I know it's anxiety because I tick every symptoms box (except most of the physical).

Any other stories similar to mine or advice would be helpful and I would like to continue the discussion.

THANK YOU.

geoff · ‎28-03-2014

dear bb, I'm sorry about all of this, but I will need to think about what's happened and will certainly reply back to you, which I'm sorry but maybe tomorrow morning, as my medication kicks in early, so I have to go to bed early, but I'm up early at about 12.01am, and hopefully you will have some other wonderful people reply to you, and please remember not to give up hope, because we want to be able to help you. Geoff.

Mbuna · ‎28-03-2014

Hey BB,

Anxiety affects many people differently. Don't get too worried about an exact diagnosis. I have been diagnosed with Generalized Anxiety Disorder but I honestly think the diagnosis will depend on the symptoms you show when you visit your GP and his or her interpretations of those symptoms at the time. I have also suffered from depression as well.

Sometimes it is hard to work out what is causing your anxiety. More often than not there are a number of things. Some people start sweating or have a tightness in their chest others just worry all the time about stuff that they should really not be worrying about. It sounds like you fall into that category. I suffer from both. You say that exercise and meditation work but only short term. I have never tried meditation but I found exercise to be very helpful. Excercise helps the brain produce endorphins. It also gives you something to take your mind off your worries. I find that if I am sitting idle I have more time to worry. If I keep myself busy, i worry less. I also found this wonderful herb called St John's Wort. I was very skeptical at first but now that I have been taking it for 3-4 months, i can honestly say that it helps a lot. It does not work straight away. It took me 3 weeks before I started to notice any difference. It can be purchased at the local pharmacy or health store. If you are on other medication however, dont take this unless you consult with your GP first. If the worries are getting you down, it probably would not hurt to go and see your GP anyway.

Hopefully some of this is helpful. Remember that you don't have to have physical symptoms to suffer from anxiety. Anxiety is often the fear of the unknown and it is predominantly a mental condition as opposed to a physical one. The good news is that its normally a very treatable condition and the earlier you start to tackle it the better.

Good luck, and please keep letting us know how you get on

Cheers

Mbuna

JessF · ‎28-03-2014

Hello bb1988, the thing with unhelpful or anxious thoughts is that countering them is a lot like exercise, you need to keep exercising certain muscles to make them stronger, or run/walk everyday if you want to increase your fitness or endurance. The fitness and the meditation, it's great you have found that they work. You have to make a habit out of these things, and do them regularly. I hate exercising but find that if I let it slip then so do my moods. Look up 'cognitive behaviour therapy' on Google, this is a very popular type of therapy that psychologists do but you can find a lot of the exercises online. There are lists and worksheets out there that help you to identify the types of thoughts you have and how you can learnt o break them down and counter them, for example, why you panic when a friend doesn't text you back. Is it because you assume you must have done somethign to annoy them? This is a type of negative thinking called 'catastrophising'.