Hi all

[Dibbles_23]

Hi guys , I’m new here and need help with anxiety.

I’ve never been to a therapist because of anxiety and fear of judgement, even writing this thread I’m tear up , so seeing a professional is a little terrifying tbh .

my anxiety is next level lately and is starting to effect my relationship , everything was okay until 3 months ago when my partner said they weren’t in love with me due to their own mental health issues , and even though we have sorted everything out , it’s left me anxious and stressed feeling like it’s going to happen again .

Anyone out there have advice at all ?

[white knight]

Hi, welcome

Seeking a therapist is no different than talking to a stranger in as much as your 2nd then 3rd visit might make you more relaxed. This process depends on the chemistry that leads to comfort between you both so it is not unusual to stop your visits and try another. I understand you are anxious about that initial meeting but it is essential so you get the treatment you need.

However if seeking therapy isnt possible for you there is some self help avenues possible with dedicating regularity. I'm talking from experience as I have lived in relative remoteness so therapy hasnt been easily available. The following threads can steer you towards some ideas. A mixture of ideas from any person is worth considering...take them and pick what suits you.

Click on the following and you only need to read the first post or more if you choose.

https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/online-forums/anxiety/anxiety-how-l-eliminated-it

https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/online-forums/anxiety/worry-worry-worry

https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/online-forums/relationship-and-family-issues/relationship-...

Repost anytime

TonyWK

[Petal22]

Hi Dibbles23,

Wellcome to our forums!

Sorry you are feeling this way…..

I understand anxiety I had severe anxiety OCD …………. I seeked professional help for it and have now recovered……. I don’t know we’re I would be without the help of professionals….

I understand seeing a psychologist would make you feel anxious but I think that’s a normal response I too felt that way……. but I persevered and am so proud of how far I have come…… if I hadn’t taken those first steps I wouldn’t be the person I am today…….. health professionals are there to help us……. Take your first step towards recovery……. Your future self will thank you for it!

here to chat

[sbella02]

Dibbles 23,

I'm sorry to hear that you're dealing with this. In terms of your partner telling you that they aren't in love with you anymore, you deserve somebody who is going to treat you with unconditional love, respect and patience, especially when you're dealing with something like anxiety. I would have an open and honest talk with them (if you're comfortable, and if you feel like it's needed) about your feelings of anxiety, your fears about the relationship, and how you can both navigate your respective mental health journeys in a way that is respectful and comfortable for you both.

I totally get you, the idea of seeing a professional and explaining your experiences to a stranger is terrifying. I was considering seeing a psychologist or therapist a few years ago, and I really wish I did because it would've helped ease my emotional burden. There's no need to fear their judgement; professionals are there to listen to you, understand your experience, and help you overcome any difficulties you may be facing.

I wish you all the best with this situation, and I'm always here to talk if you need.

Kind regards, SB

[geoff]

Hello Dibbles, and a warm welcome.

When someone is suffering from any type of depression, it's not easy for them to say 'I love you' even though deep down that's how they feel, this happens only because this illness restricts the person to feel anything other than negative thoughts, plus it forbids them from showing any interest in how you are feeling as well as what can they do to help you.

From what you've told us it appears as though both of you need to get help and to begin with, you could try relationship counselling, that's where the two of you speak to someone together, this could slowly build up your own confidence.

If you write down on some paper what you are struggling with yourself and perhaps in the relationship then all you need to do, to begin with, is hand over this document to the therapist, this will overcome the fear when they ask you 'how can I help you', the document says it all and then it slowly allows you to begin talking at your own pace.

Geoff.