Health Anxiety Has Taken Over My Life

[HelpsAlwaysNear96]

Hello,

I have had anxiety related to my health for nearly 4 years now, but these last 6 months or so it has gotten to the point where I’m starting to lose hope that I’ll ever overcome this and my days are being consumed with my fixations on physical symptoms. This stops me from getting other things done and doing things that I used to enjoy.

I go through phases of being concerned about varying medical emergencies and diseases or conditions. In a normal week I am at the doctors at least once, more commonly twice. I also go to lots of different doctors because I feel like if I keep returning to the same one they won’t take my seriously. I’ve spent a lot of time and money on lots of different tests for different conditions. This has included MRIs, blood tests, eye tests, monitors and more. I also spend hours googling symptoms, which always gives me a dire diagnosis which sets off even further anxiety.

My heart is something that is always of concern. I check my pulse over 100 times a day and am constantly at the doctor about it. I’ve had ECG testing and the 24 hour holtier monitor, as well as general blood tests. The doctor said my monitor does show minor ectopic beats but apparently they are nothing to be worried about. Despite the doctor reassuring me, I still can’t get through a single day without thinking I’m having a heart attack. I even get other physical symptoms like shortness of breath and left arm pain. I’ve presented to the emergency department multiple times but they never find anything wrong. I have episodes of very fast heart rate multiple times a week, which I’m guessing are panic attacks, but I worry it could be a heart rhythm issue.

I do see a physiologist, but even with her reassurance that anxiety can manifest itself in many physical symptoms, I can’t seem to accept this and move on.

Does anyone else suffer from this kind of anxiety because I feel like I’m the only one and that I’m just crazy. Is there any advice for overcoming it?

Thanks for taking the time to read my long post.

[Guest_2287]

Hi I'm another Health Anxiety sufferer which I have had for my whole adult life. My anxiety seems to centre around "excessive responsibility" of my health. For example if I don't keep check every little symptom I will miss some disease and it will be my fault. As you know full well, this is exhausting. I don't know if you feel the same as me as far as the reponsibility/blame thing but these are some strategies that have helped me:

The Centre for Clinical Interventions has some Health Anxiety Modules that can be downloaded for free. I found these to be very helpful. Especially the module on reducing checking. This would be great for you as like most Health Anxiety sufferers it seems you are caught up in this cycle of seeking assurance through overchecking. E.g. you would try and reduce checking your pulse gradually.

I also read that drawing a pie chart of possible factors that would contribute to you getting a disease e.g. genetics, doctor, lifestyle, yourself can help you see that sometimes it really is just out of your control.

I also found that exploring the worst-case scenario can help (even though this goes against alot of advice). Would I cope if that happened? Could I still find joy in simple things even though I have a health problem?

I have also tried to really look after myself through diet, exercise and mindfulness (this one I struggle with the most) so I feel like at least I have done everything I can!

I am the opposite as far as the doctors go. I stay away as much as I can but avoidance isn't a good strategy either so I have been trying to attend more checkups, tests etc. It has been very, very hard.

I really hope you are able to improve and just know that there are so many like you suffering with Health Anxiety.

[HelpsAlwaysNear96]

I totally understand what you are saying!!!!

I also had an experience where I took myself to the emergency department because I thought I had a brain tumour, yes it actually sounds so silly to write it now but in the moment it’s very real in your mind. The doctor at the hospital offered me a CT scan but explained the large exposure to radiation.

I actually sat there thinking... am I going to do this test which could actually increase my cancer risk. The other awful thing is that I’ve actually paid money for some expensive tests too that were not covered fully by Medicare.

That’s when I knew my health anxiety was out of control, when I started spending all this money and accepting invasive testing.

And despite all these clear tests I still haven’t gained closure, I still tell myself often that the doctors must be missing something.

Do you find clear tests give you any closure? Or do you still feel uneasy

[Guest_2287]

I think what most Health Anxiety sufferers are looking for is 100% certainty that they don't have anything. I would feel comforted by a test for a while but then doubts would set in again. Unfortunately, none of us will ever have that certainty by any doctor no matter how many tests we have. I feel I had a breakthrough in my Health Anxiety when I started to accept this and learn to live with the uncertainty of being a human. The trick seems to be to find a balance between extreme checking/testing and total avoidance. The middle road is how most people without Health Anxiety behave. This is a new behaviour to be learned for Health Anxiety sufferers. There are some books that specialise in Health Anxiety which I have found helpful too.

[Number 86]

Hi HelpsAlwaysNear96's,

totally get the same thing, I check my pulse every minute of the day. It’s extremely tiring. Today was actually a good day I feel positive and haven’t had anxiety for once. I have struggled breaking my patterns and have talk myself through the urges to check my pulse and stay away from google as that destroys me but at least I know it now. I biggest struggle has been accepting this is anxiety as In all honestly (sounds silly saying out loud) I always doubt the doctors have looked everywhere. When I have 100 reports in draw of scans and tests that prove otherwise.

I am pushing myself to meditate with guided meditation as it helps but is very difficult to pay attention to when anxiety is high.

Getting full body massage helps the most I find as at first I am anxious and then by the time I leave I am fully relaxed as taking to tension from anxiety out of the muscles and head is a great distraction for me.

hopefully you find some peace in the anxiety and get some rest soon.

[contrarymary]

This sounds exactly like me always checking my heart rate. I had an episode of atrial fibrillation over 10 years ago and given the all clear. Since then every little palpitation or missed beat has me at emergency or GP's had every test all clear nothing wrong but I still think there is and Dr Google does not help

I lie awake for hours listening for a palpitation.

i am thinking I need extra help.

i have decided that life must go on and from today I am not got going to check my pulse hourly and be more positive.

I always think I am the only person with these issues but reading your post and others shows me that I am not