Full Time work - Struggling

[Soberlicious96]

Hi all,

I'm not new to BB, in fact have been on here for almost 18 months now. Mostly trying to offer up support for others.

But lately, I am feeling some stress of my own.

See, very recently I started full time work, in a job that I've been in, in a part time capacity for more than 5 years now. I haven't actually worked full time for about 14 years or more, and since this pandemic, work has been CRAZY busy. We've had a couple of people leave in the last few months, since lock-down started, one new person start, plenty of angry customers and people just being so impatient, and wanting a 'million dollar product' for the price of a carton of milk! ..... okay, so maybe I'm exaggerating slightly there, but not by much!

Funnily enough, I've coped relatively well with the pandemic itself .... which is why I didn't post in that particular area of the Beyond Blue site ..... I mean, sure I had my tough days at first, but now I'm coping with that part of life quite well.

I am just feeling so stressed by the end of the say that I can feel myself grinding my teeth, and swearing more and there's tension in my neck ........ yeah, I just feel quite stressed and anxious and like I just am not keeping up with the demands of the job. And the PHONE!!! Oh my goodness, the phone just won't friggin STOP!!!!!!!!!!

What really gets my goat, is the way that so many people think they are more important than everyone else. "Oh, but I buy from here all the time" they say. And I think 'Yeah, and I bet you get your milk and bread from the same supermarket every week too, but THEY don't give you a discount/special treatment/free stuff just because you are supposedly loyal to them, do they?!'

I just feel like screaming at them all and saying "Grow the hell up! Get off your high horse and accept your place in the world! Stop acting like spoiled little brats who can't get their own way! And STOP BEING SO IMPATIENT!"

We're all doing the best we can with what we have. Why can't that be enough though?

Having said all of that, most days I do actually really enjoy my job ..... most days. But some days ..... well, what else can I say? People just annoy me sometimes. And today was one of those days.

Any suggestions on how to cope better with this new level of activity in my life? And btw, I don't want to go back to part time, if that's what you are thinking of suggesting.

Anyway, the floor is yours ........ thanks for reading.

Mel. xo

[white knight]

Hi

I’ll never personally get accustomed to the bad days arriving without notice. That’s my first observation sober.

The next is people. The more I study them the more I notice selfishness, greed, impatience, lack of manners and respect and obvious kindness towards others. I have known for decades however that the smaller the town and the further from the city the less this happens. Hence our existence in a regional town.

My other response to the outrage you feel (when you want to yell at them) is wit. A few choice words can hit the mark and if done well will not get you in trouble.

”I have only one other speed- and it’s slower”

my thread- wit, the only answer to torment....sums it up.

TonyWK

[Soberlicious96]

Thanks Tony.

I think I just needed to get it off my chest. Today was a little quieter, thank God.

And yeah, imagine if the bad/tougher days did come with a warning?!! Like in the movies when there's a scary scene coming up ..... you know it's gonna be scary because of the music!

Maybe I should find a witty line to use!

Anyway, thanks again. Definitely feeling better today.

Cheers. Mel. xo

[quirkywords]

Mel,

I could write a book about rude and demanding customers.
so many wanted a discount when I was one of the shops that sold books that were good value.

just one person comparing would upset me.
focus on the nice customers.

My wit would go over people’s head.
people would say what is your best price, if item was $10 I’d say my best price was $20!

it made me laugh.
take care

Quirky

[white knight]

Many years ago my first wife and I in struggle street built cubbies, cute little ones with attic windows.

A lady beat me down heavily in price. She lived on top of a mountain. I did damage to my engine towing it up there. Upon arrival saw 4 vintage Jaguars in the driveway.

Husband was indeed a brain surgeon.

Lesson learned

Glad you feel better friend

TonyWK

[smallwolf]

Hiya, how was your day today?

One thing I have been doing recently is collecting inspirational quotes. Perhaps getting better at reframing thoughts. I still have bad days - rather than getting angry (?) I feel overwhelmed as if there is too much to do, and then get stuck trying to work out what to do next. While not written down, I try to remind myself I am only human and doing the best that I can. That may not work for you? If not then we could work out one that works for you?

[Soberlicious96]

Hey yeah!!!

I like that tactic, Quirky! Maybe I should/could tell them that the best price is MORE!!!

Hmmmm .... am definitely putting that technique into my mind's file of how to manage those difficult demanding customers. Could work a treat!

Thanks everyone for responding. Feeling much better today. xo

[White_Rose]

Hello Mel

Other people are the pits at times. Why can't they be more like us, the calm reasonable folk of the world? Hmmm.

Anxiety and depression are classics for getting cranky over quite minor details. I have been known to blow up for some quite trivial reason because of the events in my life. Sometimes I think we are almost looking for an excuse to vent because of what is happening in the background of our lives. Maybe this is why your customers (some of them) are so demanding and obnoxious.

One way I have found to diffuse these situations is to agree with the customer. They are often so surprised they calm down straight away. "Yes, I know it's irritating to wait when you need to be somewhere else. I felt like that yesterday when....". Quite often takes the sting out of the discussion. Remember to smile while you say it. It is difficult to stay angry when someone is, genuinely, smiling at you. A bit of validation and a small reference to our own problems shows the customer we are human too. And just think of the face muscles you are exercising when you smile.

What I have found is that the more I want to tell someone what I think The more careful I need to be with my remarks. It just does not help to be annoyed with them. Just gives the customer an excuse to be more angry and the situation escalates. You are the only person whose words you can manage. Helping the other person to relax makes it easier for you.

I was waiting to be served while the man in front of me was getting a large number of items. He seemed conscious I was waiting though I was not getting impatient. When he told the butcher he would take the leg of lamb in the front of the display cabinet I commented I wanted to be invited to his party. He laughed and said I was welcome. Then when he had all his bits he apologised for keeping me waiting. I thought that was lovely of him.

It's true, laughter is the best medicine.

Mary