Feeling out of place

[PsychedelicFur]

Hello all,

Let me give a short clarification ;

I have always been what most would call a ‘solitary loner.’
Sure - I’ve had friends! Although I have never HAD A BEST FRIEND REALLY. Although many were not exactly my age. More of the older demographic, if you will.

I just feel incredibly lonely and like such a misfit. I feel like a sore toe that is sticking out, quite hideously and badly.

When I finally find someone who I genuinely think could make a great ‘best friend’ I then shortly find out that they already have someone that they call - a best friend. I have never been someone’s best friend. And it really stinks! I suppose, I don’t really like the term ‘best friend’ anyway...come to think of it!

I feel so out of place. So disorientated. And even more so utterly devastated and confused.

Recently, I was diagnosed with high functioning autism by my psychologist. I proud of myself for getting a proper diagnosis. And above all of that it was a bit of a relief for me. Finally I could identify the problem.. not that autism is a problem as such. I just finally knew that my brain was not wired like a non-autistic person’s. So I think a lot differently to most people.

I just feel trapped and heavily misunderstood. I feel like I am just there in the corner and people don’t want to understand me because I am a little eccentric (personality and appearance wise)

I feel misunderstood, overlooked and quite honestly a little invisible!

Signed a sad,

PF

[Ric65]

Hello PF,

Have just read your post. Really sorry you feel that way.

What do you think of looking at it in a different way? Being different is good and if people do not want to understand and associate then it is their loss cause you are awesome. We cannot control how people feel and act but we are in total control how we react to others.

You also mentioned that when you make a friend they end up already having a best friend? Would you like to look at it like this and see if it helps? Think of life as a train journey where you are travelling to your destination and people get on as passengers, strike up a conversation become friends until they reach their destination and get off. Until one passenger gets on and travels that journey with you all the way.

I guess what I am trying to say is, you continue to best your best version of you. Do not consider yourself as a misfit, there will come a day when you will meet the right best friend. Don't try to hard hard to find one, let it happen freely.

Hope that helps. Take care.

[Weaponsofmassdisstortion]

I have always felt like an outsider, until I discovered the internet. I think getting on the internet and finding out other people are even weirder than me, helped a lot. Like you, I prefer spending most of my time alone. Although as I get older, I am starting to realise, that I can't spend all my time on my own.