Don't just do something. Sit there.

[Pixie15]

Hi,

I have trouble doing nothing.

When my anxiety sets in I can become particularly active although the activity I choose is not necessarily well thought out or productive. I am coming off a period of necessary high activity due to dealing with my partner having an accident. During this time I have managed to do everything necessary and hold things together but have let my own self care go. This has been a feature of my life. Although I do not really know how I would do anything differently. If something needs to be done it needs to be done.

I am just wondering if anyone else can relate to this.

Christine.

[L_lucky]

hey Christine, sorry to hear about your partner.hope he recovers quickly.i can relate to your post, i find it very hard to relax , wind down etc and cant sleep because of this.lol. im always doing something and not as well as it could be done as very tired alot of the time. lifes jobs are endless especially around the house! it can sometimes be good to get away from the jobs/tasks. i know they will be there when you come home, they truly are endless.but time to process is very important and helps get the jobs done better and easier. i find it relaxing just going outdoors for a walk, and if you take the dog thats a job getting done .lol. even though i find it hard to go out sometimes, i always feel better once im out. hope this helps.luke

[Beltane]

I used to have a massive problem with this, back when my anxiety and depression were a bit worse off. Actually though to be honest, by nature (ie my natural personality) is to be very energetic and to always be doing something- sewing, dancing, music. If i'm sitting, then i'm reading a book, posting on here, studying.

I remember i used to have such a problem with "being still" that when i met my current psychologist i burst into tears and begged her not to ask me to meditate or do yoga. I'd done all that at the insistence of several psychs, and it physically and mentally pained me. Id dint realise it at the time, but part of that was that i had bipolar and anxiety that just was not controlled. My brain just ran faster than everyone else- i described is as thousands of thoughts running through my head. Its extremely stressful to live like that, so many thoughts, it put me in a constat state of agitation. All i wanted was a break from the constant business of my own head.
It was so bad i even walked really fast, talked so fast noone could understand me, couldnt sleep, i simply couldnt slow down. It went on for years.

So anyway, my medical treatment helped. But aside from that was the psychologist pointed out that i was full of energy, and these previous psychs had been trying to force me to relax when really what i needed to do was get the energy out. It was trapped inside and i wasnt using it so it was causing problems.

Long story short, i picked up some hobbies to do that require energy, focus, concentration etc. I sew (thats a mental focus and concentration which forces me to concentrate on one thing- sewing- which enables me to have a break from the 10000 thoughts). I do Crossfit most nights, which burns up the anxious and stressful energy of the day. I also play music- i got myself a nice little hand drum (a djembe) and beat along with my favourite music, or even dance around the room. it allows me to express overwhelming emotions. So there you have a mental outlet, a physical outlet and an emotional outlet.

With all those outlets, I no longer have issues sitting still and just being. I can meditate now, especially after burning up the anxious energy by going for a run first. My mind no longer runs a million miles an hour, and i talk and walk normally as well as can think straight without fast thoughts racing. My therapy works a lot better because my brain can now concentrate on it.

Maybe try getting the energy out before you try relaxing?

[Pixie15]

Hi L Lucky,

Thanks for replying and welcome to the forums. My partner is recovering well. Nice to know I am not alone. I am trying to wind down. I know it is just a matter of doing the most important and letting everything else go but still hard to apply even if I know it is right. It can actually be quite satisfying working full speed till the exhaustion sets in.

One of the jobs I have inherited is walking the dogs which I do not mind doing but they are not well trained. I try to take them out when there are not too much activity so that they are not too stressed.

cheers,

Christine.

[Pixie15]

Hi Beltane,

What you write is interesting. I have always been an active person too. I cannot just sit and watch television. Most days I will need to be doing something else as well. I have tried things like needle work and knitting. 

I have also been caught up in doing yoga and meditation. When I was doing that as a daily practice I would spend a couple of hours working through postures so that I would be comfortable sitting for twenty minutes. I was very flexible but it is a lot of time to commit each day.

My partner thinks I put myself through a lot of misery trying to do new things and maybe he is right to some extent.

I am just trying to find balance now.

cheers,

Christine.