Go to tafe feel anxious, stay home get depressed.

[tulpa]

hi, I had to study for five hours to day which may not sound like much to most people but I broke down crying in class it was an online module so I just turned the microphone off, I've cried every day for nearly 2 weeks now except tuesday for some reason feeling ok that day. Whenever I try to do something with my education or work it makes me feel anxious and cry uncontrollably whenever I stay home and do nothing I feel guilty and depressed. I'm 29 now and feel like i shouldn't be at home not doing anything all day but this course is becoming too much for me despite everyone there being friendly and the work itself being easy. I'm also worried I'll start crying in class one day.

[Zeal]

Hi Tulpa,

I'm sorry to hear about this internal struggle you're experiencing. It sounds as though you could have anxiety and/or depression. Of course, I don't know enough about you to make a judgement call. I suggest going to your GP to discuss your situation. What you're experiencing is not your fault, and it's a vicious cycle, unfortunately. When you attend TAFE, you are doing something great for your development, but you feel emotional and overwhelmed. This leads to you staying home, which results in misery and guilt. You can overcome this, with the help of your GP and/or psychologist. See your GP for an appointment first - they can refer you to someone if they think it's needed.

Good luck with seeking help.

Best wishes,

SM

[Pixie15]

Hi Tulpa,

Studying for 5 hours sounds like a lot to me. I would only do that maybe if I had to finish an essay or prepare for an exam and I had no other choice. 

Generally I will break up my study periods so that I am not staring at a screen for more than an hour especially if I am studying at home. I will get up and go for a walk round the garden or do something practical like sweep the floors, put on a load of washing etc. Also when I have to sit for long periods because I have run out of time I have a ball that I can stop and throw up in the air to give myself a mental break and a little physical stretch.

I am wondering if you might be being a little hard on yourself by expecting to be able to do this?

Grateful.

[tulpa]

The 5 hours was class work so far I have completed 0% of my homework.

[Pixie15]

Hi tulpa,

Sorry I read your post wrong. If you mean you were in the classroom doing an online module. I am wondering did your class mates realize you were crying and did anyone come to your aid? 

Grateful.

[tulpa]

I was crying during an online lesson via adobe connect so noone could have known I was crying

[Pixie15]

Hi Tulpa,

If you are the only one who knows you are crying why worry about it. It would have been more uncomfortable if you had been with other people, especially if they ignored you, but still not that much of a big deal. Learning can be stressful, students cry sometimes, it happens.

Do you have anything you do to manage your anxiety besides staying in your room?

Grateful.

[tulpa]

Nothing seems to be very effective I take some meds but nothing else seems to have an effect.

[Kirlea26]

Hi Tulpa,

I know exactly what your feeling. I got very bad anxiety about 5 years ago. Uni was the biggest trigger for me. I would drive there, park & leave again. I couldn't face going to tutorials or lectures. The less I attended the further behind I got which made my anxiety even worse. I would just sleep for most of the day because when I was alseep I wasn't anxious. I went and saw a GP and explained my situation.Many tears later I was prescribed a low does of an SSRI. I must say it did help, I was also referred to a psycologist who I saw monthly whilst on the meds.  I only took them for just over a year but it got me through my final year of Uni. It might be worth your while seeing a GP and trying something like that to get through your studies. I didn't like the idea of taking something like that due to side effects but I look back now and I needed it. 

 You will get there 🙂