Dealing with Anxiety

[jessm1]

I should be so happy I have happy and healthy children that I love and they love me, I have a husband that I love and he loves me and looks after me. I have a a family that loves me, our new family home and animals that love me... why do I still feel so empty and like I'm failing at life? We moved from Sydney to Queensland 1.5 years ago leaving our family and friends behind. It was so hard to start off with but got through it.
Now The past year had been hard with the covid and packing and moving all by myself and my disease Lupus and Fibo doing it all alone 😪i have been running on adrenalin and now my head and body just can't take it any more and I feel like an emotional mess. I know it was our decision to move up here to make a better life for the kids and a slower paced life for us with the bigger house and no debt other then our home loan. And that we have done with pride and the kids love it up here. But the empty spot in my heart is my parents not being near. I know it was our decision to move our your life is in Sydney, but I wish so much they could make part of there life up here with us aswell! I feel there missing out on so much of ours and the kids life's. All there school stuff milestones etc and life is just passing so fast. I want to look after tyem both when your old and dribbly, with appointments etc. I want to be able to get in the car and drive over whenever I feel like it. My only ever regret is leaving you them and not being able to get in the car and see them whenever. When I see other families my heart breaks so much which I try and hide and brush off for the sake of my kids, but I know when they see grandparents etc at school events there hearts break aswell. I am a mess with it all at the moment and I am really not coping with it at the moment, constantly crying and a feeling of emptiness. Any ideas on how to deal with this? 
Thank you.

[AverageAusGuy]

Hi Jess@m,

It sounds like you have had a really hectic time organising your move, managing your health, and dealing with Covid stress. As a result you are really missing your parents and probably feeling a bit home sick and questioning your decision to move to QLD in the first place.

I also moved away from my friends and family for a new life in a nicer city a few years back and for a better lifestyle. The first couple of years can be tough but it does get easier. Now I can't imagine going back to my home town even though I do miss my family sometimes to.

My advice would be to stay as connected as possible with your parents back in Sydney. Maybe you could set up weekly Skype or video calls so that your kids can see them and your parents can watch them grow and celebrate millstones from a distance. Also, make sure you get out into the community and join some social sport or groups now that Covid restrictions have mostly eased and make some new friends in QLD. Enjoy all that QLD has to offer. See the sights, find some interesting places to see and fun things to do with you kids and partner. You can show your parents all the local hot spots when they visit. Get into a new routine here in QLD.

Keep reminding yourself why you made the move to QLD in the first place. You said your kids love it and you and your partner are debt free except your house which is great.

One bonus that I have found since living away from my family is we actually appreciate our time together alot more and make the most of that time when we do catch up. Sometimes when you are able to see your family whenever you want you or they can take it for granted. I actually prefer to see my family in person less often now because I know that when we do get together we are making memories every time.

I hope this helps. All the best.

[jessm1]

Thank you so much for your reply! Everything you have said is spot on! Fingers crossed I start to feel better soon! Thank you!!