Hi everyone,
I’ve recently discovered Beyond Blue and would like to share my experience. Really pleasing to see a good forum for people to assist one another. I’d love to hear your story too.
Firstly, my mental health has always been resilient and stable. Generally a very relaxed, composed and bright / bubbly person. I never imagined my life taking this dark turn, plus I had no idea (until recently) how many people are actually going through serious mental health battles.
It started for me two months ago when I sent myself to hospital after experiencing bad chest pain and dizziness. I had my very first panic attack while connected to the heart rate monitors there; saw my heart rate rise quickly to 180 and then drop to 30. At this point I was close to black out. I thought I was dying in that moment of a heart attack. Doctors told me heart and bloods were fine and to go home.
My doctor immediately wanted to put me on anti-depressants, which I wasn’t overly impressed about, considering most physical problems weren’t ruled out. Since then I have done multiple physical tests which have all come back ok; Several ECG’s, echocardiogram, myocardial perfusion. I have been in a constant state of worry / fear and my life has been a constant challenge. From when I wake in the morning, to when I finally fall asleep at night, I am living on edge and feeling I could collapse at any moment. Both my nana and grandad (passed) had heart problems, plus I’ve been a smoker and binge drinker for ten years (completely stopped both after my initial panic attack).
I am 34 and this is something I had never experienced before. I have been to emergency 4-5 times now, struggling to sleep at night (even my dreams are anxiety filled), can’t concentrate, easily exhausted, heavily fatigued and am convinced life is slowly coming to an end.
I’ve been staying with family because I’m worried about being on my own. Have tried (and continue to do) deep breathing exercises, meditation, clean eating, acupuncture, therapy sessions, naturopath (taking a lot of supplements), and have a psychiatrist appointment next week. Was walking 6-7km daily, however most recently feel dizzy after 500m-1km in.
I tried an antidepressant for three days and it sent my symptoms into overdrive, my doctor told me to stop until I see the psychiatrist.
Am totally committed to doing anything safe and reasonable to allow myself a chance to get better. Myself and my daughter need me back to my healthy self.
