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Anxiety

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Chris_B Forums etiquette: give support to receive support
  • replies: 0

Hi everyone, particularly any new members who may be reading. From time to time, we get contacted by members who are unhappy that they haven’t received a lot of replies to their posts. Our community champions work very hard to make sure that all newb... View more

Hi everyone, particularly any new members who may be reading. From time to time, we get contacted by members who are unhappy that they haven’t received a lot of replies to their posts. Our community champions work very hard to make sure that all newbies are welcomed when they first post, and we understand that it’s a big step to post for the first time on a forum like this, especially if you aren’t feeling great. It’s important to remember, though, that these forums are a community of real people, just like you, not a one-on-one support environment like going to see your psychologist. To get the best out of being here, one of the best tips we can offer is give support to receive support. Being a good community member means: participating in different threads (not just your own), replying to people who have taken the time to reply to you (even if it’s just to say thank you), and... posting words of emotional support and encouragement when you see others who are hurting and reaching out. You don’t have to feel obliged to solve the problems of others: that’s not what we’re here for. But you can offer empathy and what you’ve learned from your own life experiences, even if it’s just a line or two, eg. “I don't know what to say, but I want to give you my support and tell you I care about what is happening to you and hope life will get better soon.” Try to develop an interest in the journeys of others here on the forums. You may be surprised at how good being an active, caring member here can make you feel. For those of you who have had good experiences giving support here on the forums, please post in this thread here and let us know how it has helped you on your journey.

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Jobby24 Anxious Thoughts
  • replies: 4

After suffering with Anxiety for 5 years, I finally started meds and have been on them for 1 week. I realise they don’t start working for a few weeks. My problem is at the moment - I take a perceived issue and snowball it in my mind to this huge big ... View more

After suffering with Anxiety for 5 years, I finally started meds and have been on them for 1 week. I realise they don’t start working for a few weeks. My problem is at the moment - I take a perceived issue and snowball it in my mind to this huge big “my life as I know it will end” thing. When I get stuck on something like this it’s all I can think about - I wake up in the middle of the night and just keep building it up bigger and bigger. I remind myself that hardly anything I ever worry about actually happens but that doesn’t help because what if this is the first big thing that does happen and my life (I love my life with my family) will be over and I will be devastated? I can’t seem to budge the feelings for a few days and then they diminish but never go away completely and I might be reminded of them in a vague way and then all those anxious feelings I felt come flooding back. I get worried that my gut instinct is all out of whack - I don’t know what feelings to trust and what ones not too. Each thing I worry about seems very huge and important and worthy of my thoughts. I’m not even sure I’m making sense. I try to practice mindfulness but I can’t always make it work. Any advice? Also unsure if the meds will help this? Thank you for reading this!

T95 Quit Job
  • replies: 3

Hi, For the last 2 months I have been working at a new job. During this time my anxiety has been the worst it's even been. I've had so many panic attacks which I've never had before. The people at this job are nice, the work load is a lot and stressf... View more

Hi, For the last 2 months I have been working at a new job. During this time my anxiety has been the worst it's even been. I've had so many panic attacks which I've never had before. The people at this job are nice, the work load is a lot and stressful. I ended up wanting to quit a month ago but thought maybe I was being hard on myself and just needed to settle in. My anxiety for worse since then and the thought of going back makes me wants to crumble into 1000 pieces. I saw my doctor yesterday and she put me on a "low" does anxiety medication. However, today I have no appetite and a migraine. Has anyone else experienced this? I also decided to quit my job. My partner wasn't very supportive of this decision as I don't have a job to go to until I find one. I've always stuck jobs out and always had one before I've left but this time I just couldn't and I feel like a failure. Now we have to live off my partners income and it's just going to tear us apart.

white knight Anxiety -mind over matter
  • replies: 4

We've heard the saying "mind over matter", that is to be mentally strong enough to endure lifes challenges like abuse, rejection, mental daily challenges and even basic action like going outdoors to shop. One of the many problems with anxiety, that w... View more

We've heard the saying "mind over matter", that is to be mentally strong enough to endure lifes challenges like abuse, rejection, mental daily challenges and even basic action like going outdoors to shop. One of the many problems with anxiety, that was highlighted in1987 during my first therapy session was realism. He asked me regularly when I mentioned my thoughts during the week- "is that realistic"? 90% of the time it wasn't hence, an anxious mental state. Eg I wont park in a one hour zone to enter a newsagents or I might get a parking fine. Unrealistic as I'd only be there 5 minutes. I wont take a train into the city as there might be a train strike and I'd be stranded. Getting things into perspective is a key to recovery with anxiety. What about "matter over mind"? It is another theory of mine. Many times during my decades of anxiety now largely conquered, I'd question my ability to carry out a basic task like driving to a town I not often visited. Yet when I finally found the courage the task proved easy. Some of this process involves changing our mind Google Beyondblue Topic switching mindsets Essentially that theme is to allow your physical actions to commence a task BEFORE you think too much about it, knowing that it is my minds anxious makeup that is enabling me to feel I cant do those tasks. Mind over matter is an impossible thinking process if it is beyond your capability. "Matter over mind" is more possible by temporarily detaching your over thinking, over analysing mind. A process more likely within your capability. It is a different path to the same objective...to overcome our unrealistic fears that can lead us back towards a normal life. Freedom from anxiety took me 30 years. Matter over mind had a significant role in that recovery. TonyWK

Rod_NR93 Adopted a pet by mistake?
  • replies: 2

I wasnt sure where to post this thread but as I suffer anxiety this seemed the best place. I adopted a kitten only three days ago and feel I have to return it. I thought long and hard about adopting. It was not a decision I made on impulse. Having th... View more

I wasnt sure where to post this thread but as I suffer anxiety this seemed the best place. I adopted a kitten only three days ago and feel I have to return it. I thought long and hard about adopting. It was not a decision I made on impulse. Having the kitten has almost turned my home life upside down. The cat also demands my constant attention. I can't handle it and fortunately the RSPCA will take her back. I've decided to reassess on Monday. I feel just awful though.

Jimbo86 Depersonalisation
  • replies: 5

Hello everybody does anyone have any helpful tips on depersonalisation

Hello everybody does anyone have any helpful tips on depersonalisation

CourtneyJ Post kitten adoption regret - can anyone relate?
  • replies: 8

Hi 31 year old GAD sufferer here. I've just recently adopted a 12 week old kitten named Henry. For a kitten he's very well behaved (uses the litter box, does scratch too much etc.) Now I didn't adopt on a whim. I thought about it for a while and did ... View more

Hi 31 year old GAD sufferer here. I've just recently adopted a 12 week old kitten named Henry. For a kitten he's very well behaved (uses the litter box, does scratch too much etc.) Now I didn't adopt on a whim. I thought about it for a while and did a lot of preparation. But now I have him home I am f-n miserable. My anxiety levels are through the roof. I can't eat, don't sleep and even forget to shower. I don't want to pet him at all and I cry all the time. And I resent the changes he's caused to my living space (not being able to have open doors in my house to the bedroom or balcony). I have a 1 bedroom apartment and I've alway been very introverted and valued my personal space and not having to share it with anyone else. All my friends say that it's a phase, that it'll pass and that eventually I won't be able to live without him. I don't see this happening (probably because I'm consumed by my anxiety). I just want to return him to the RSPCA and I have 1.5 weeks to decide. Has anyone else been through this? Does anyone have any advice? Note: Please don't say anything about "adopting 2 kittens" because that is not going to happen.

Guest_2574 How do i deal with my abusive neighbour
  • replies: 2

My neighbour adjoining my townhouse is psychologicaly abusive to me and my dog. I have nothing but polite and helpful to her. I have given her expensive things. Helped her pets out. Even bought her a washing machine. Never got a thankyou for any of i... View more

My neighbour adjoining my townhouse is psychologicaly abusive to me and my dog. I have nothing but polite and helpful to her. I have given her expensive things. Helped her pets out. Even bought her a washing machine. Never got a thankyou for any of it. I hadn't seen her out her front for awhile and even knocked on her door to ask r u ok? For quite awhile now shes been realy rude to me in subtle ways. Not once has she asked about my mental health. She gives me a slanty eyed look or avoids eye contact altogether. She knows im the least externaly angry person so knows it will bottle up inside me. Shes put a bin against the fence and piling her dogs poo in plastic bags up in it. You can imagine the smell on a hot day. I wish i could move where theres no humans but im stuck here

rhianna_jn Sick of work
  • replies: 1

Hi everyone. For the last four months I have being working two jobs to save up a little more money before heading back to uni. Before taking this job, I wasn’t getting many shifts and thought this was going to help makes things easier financially and... View more

Hi everyone. For the last four months I have being working two jobs to save up a little more money before heading back to uni. Before taking this job, I wasn’t getting many shifts and thought this was going to help makes things easier financially and to an extent, it has. The last couple of weeks have been an absolute nightmare and I’m filled with dread each time I have to go there. It’s very unorganised and each individual has their own way of doing things. As someone who is still learning their job, it makes it difficult to have a good grasp on what I need to be doing to effectively do my job. I’ve mentioned several times that things are simply not working but my complaints have fallen on deaf ears. I’m sick of feeling like shit when I go to work. I spend most of my shift counting down the hours until it’s over. It makes me miserable and I truly hate being there. The only good thing about it is the hours (which are still pretty crappy) are permanent so I know I will be receiving at least some money for that week. I want to leave but if I do, I go back to working solely a casual job with a manager who cuts hours at her own discretion. I am currently job hunting in the hope of finding something better, and that’s making me feel worse because it can be quite discouraging waiting around to hear if you have got an interview. I’m not sure whether I should stay at both or quit the one that fills me the most with dread and just work the other, even though there’s anxiety around my managers rostering because she tends to fluctuate with how many hours she gives me. Any advice would be greatly appreciated!

Meowface Guilt about boundaries -39 weeks pregnant
  • replies: 3

I’ve had to deal with very dominant personalities since childhood - my own mother has been a very strong and controlling influence in my life. Ive done a lot of therapy over the years and have learnt that my response to the dominance has been to beco... View more

I’ve had to deal with very dominant personalities since childhood - my own mother has been a very strong and controlling influence in my life. Ive done a lot of therapy over the years and have learnt that my response to the dominance has been to become a very passive person. I stick to myself and try to be very independent. This normally keeps things manageable even though deep down I know there’s a lot of anger there. Anyway I’m now 39 weeks pregnant and am overwhelmed by the dominant people I’m having to manage. My husband is similar to me with similar parents so there’s a whole group of people that are pushing about expectations to be in the waiting room, babysit the baby, organise other visitors etc. without ever asking what we want or need. I just got off the phone with my mother and explained that we don’t want anyone in the waiting room. Grandparents will be first but we want a few hours to ourselves to bond with baby on our own. Its an awkward conversation because these personality types never ask what you actually want, so you kind of have to sound a bit dramatic when putting your needs forward. She was typical in her response, made me feel stupid and demanding “oh there’s so many rules”. I want so desperately to have better boundaries but after I speak up for myself my anxiety just gets worse. I feel very alone and worried about my own mental health but other people just don’t seem to care.

YellowPoppy Have a peaceful sleep
  • replies: 2

Hi all, I know everyone is going through their own serious stuff, I know I am. But I wanted to put something nice out there for people to see tonight. So I hope everyone has a peaceful and restful sleep and that when you wake up tomorrow morning I si... View more

Hi all, I know everyone is going through their own serious stuff, I know I am. But I wanted to put something nice out there for people to see tonight. So I hope everyone has a peaceful and restful sleep and that when you wake up tomorrow morning I sincerely hope things will feel better or easier. Sending love and support and kindness and compassion for all of you YellowPoppya