Anxiety when having conversations

[HummingbirdX]

Hi. I have suffered anxiety for a long time, I have ibs, am legally blind and hard of hearing so I have a lot to deal with but I know I am not the only one. I have noticed that if I am wearing my sunglasses while talking to people I don’t get anxiety but if I don’t wear them I do. Does anyone have any idea what that means?

[Aaronsis]

Hi HummingbirdX

You sure do have a lot on your plate and I am so very glad you have reached out here to get some support.

I am actually going through something very very similar with my mother who is 74 years old, she has extreme anxiety, practically deaf and has one eye that is severely turned in. She is so very very self conscious about it that she only wears sunglasses out in public, and even if we are inside she will not take them off, which kind of makes people stare but oh well. The glasses sort of give her a "hiding place" where she does not have to have her turned eye on display and gives her some level of comfort. Perhaps this is true for you too, that when you have the glasses on you are "protected" and people wont judge you.

I think that if you have found a way to manage your anxiety I think that is great, even if you don't know why it is you feel better with them on at least you are not feeling all overwhelmed and full of anxiety and that is great.

It is great that you have reached out here for some support and others will join in and chat too so it will be interesting to see what other people think too.

Welcome to the forum HummingbirdX and hope to chat to you some more.

Hugs

AS

[HummingbirdX]

Wow! Thanks that actually makes sense to me, never thought of it that way 😀

[Aaronsis]

Hi HummingbirdX

Great to chat to you again and I am so pleased that you can feel some support in what I was saying.

It would be great to chat to you some more if you would like to, we are here to listen and if you wanted to share some of your story with regards to anxiety that would be great, if not that is fine too.

Hugs to you

AS

[RicardoD]

Hey HummingbirdX, would agree with Aaronisis - I think engaging someone's eyes can be extremely confronting or personal sometimes. In the west we tent to see it as a sign of respect or that you're engaged and listening, whilst in others such as the Australian Indigenous it's rude and looks to challenge another person - so eye contact can mean different things. In your case perhaps you feel that someone being able to stare into your eyes is anxiety inducing, and it's easier for you to remain behind the dark glasses.

My uncle, also legally blind, generally wears darker glasses or orange tinted glasses to help get that little bit of extra vision (he has about 70-80% blindness I think). But if you feel better wearing dark glasses then wear them, explain the situation to others or not, up to you, but do what you feel is right for you. You could experiment with taking them off at different times - do you wear them for example when you're walking around on your own or in conversations only (as you mentioned above) or in the office?

Good on you for reaching out anyway, and does sound like you have a fair bit on your plate. Always feel free to come into the forum and asks questions or simply chat 🙂