Anxiety Holds Me Back

[AndreLB]

Hi everyone,

I'm hoping some of you can provide me with some advice or share your experiences with me on this. For the past year I've been feeling really anxious all of the time. I've had a hard time committing to events and I'm always anxious to organise events myself and ask people to hang out. I've had a hard time lending help to people as I don't want them to take advantage of me and I feel like I need to control everything in my environment. I know it all sounds silly and it probably is but I don't know what to do to escape this nightmare. Prior to 2023 I used to be super comfortable with myself, my studies were good, I had good friends, I pushed myself out of my comfort zone, I had a good job and I was volunteering a lot at a mental health group. I loved it! Sadly by the end of 2022 I was burnt-out from studying, I received little support during my time volunteering, and I had friends who projected their mental health issues onto me. I had a lot of weight on my shoulders and it took a toll on me. By early 2023 I was a mental mess, irritable, angry, resentful and I began questioning whether people deserved my help or not. I began saying no to people and anytime someone asked for help I immediately thought to myself "they're just using me". This all led me down a really dark pathway where I struggled to commit to events (I would often cancel at the last minuet), I didn't want to help people anymore, I struggled to put myself out there to the point that I would often delete messages before anyone saw them, I was a mess. My life is still good though, I have an amazing girlfriend in my life, good family, good friends, my studies are going well and I just got a new job recently. But I can't shake this anxiety, I force myself out of my comfort zone and I'm still able to live my life but this anxiety just won't go away. Does anyone have any ideas that would help? Thank you 🙂

[Ggrand]

Hello Dear Andrel_B,

A very caring and warm welcome to the forums…

I’m really sorry this is happening to you, It’s okay to no, you need to care for you first…if  you’re mentally unwell it’s so hard to help others…sometimes we need to put some boundaries in place to help ourselves…...Please look after yourself with the compassion and care you have given others….

Anxiety is horrible, I struggle with it so much…I try to remember that anxiety is just our thoughts making up different scenarios about upcoming events, mostly these scenarios that our brain produces don’t happen often and when the event or whatever it was comes around, it’s a lot different outcome to what our anxious thoughts have tried to make us believe it would be like…

It’s beautiful that you have an amazing girlfriend, good family and good friends…do they know how much you’re struggling mentally right now…if not is talking to them about it something you’re open to?..

Kind thoughts Dear Andrel_B..

Grandy..