25 and I've Never had a Job and without my Driving and Ruined for different Reasons, Also No Friends, and Girlfriend - Experiences

[BabySteps]

I was Miss Diagnosed with Schizophrenia, Contracted Pre Diabetes Type-2, and have a Polyp In my Gall Bladder, and I'm overdue for Surgery by 1 Year due to Covid 19, It put my Driving behind by 9 Months

In relation to my Driving Progress at 25 I started at 22 Pursuing my Driving, However

1) Based on my Mental Health Miss Diagnosis, It took ( Dandenong ) 11 Month's to Fill out my Permission Forms so I could eligibly go for my Permit eligibility

2) I Finally started getting Driving Lessons, and I had the Wrongs Instructors till my recent Instructor that I much prefer

3) I had No Suitable Parent's, or Others to Drive with outside Lessons

4) I wasn't always guaranteed a Weekly Lesson, all the Time

5) I wasn't always guaranteed a suitable Weekly Session Time

6) Had to change My Old O.T Occupational Therapist, because She Told VIC ROAD's that I'm not In her favor of Confidence, now they either want to Restrict me or Suspend my Permit, TRAGICALLY, and that's not needed at all to happen

...

In Relation to WORK

1) I never had my Driver's License, and Much Public Transit Skills, besides 2 LOCAL ROUTES that I rarely Take

2) I never had a sense for what's Manageable, Available, or generally what I ( enjoyed outside my Hobbies )

3) You need Experience or Volunteer for most Entry Jobs, sometimes Further Education, and not all Industries or Jobs or Employers offer Volunteer, and not all either way would lead to a Payed Position anyway

4) Having by LAW, To notify a Employer about a Diagnoses of Illness, Discriminates me by Double the Regular Standard, Even If so a Miss Diagnosis

5) I can't Study without Driving, to complete Work Placement, and you need, Affordable Cost's, Local Proximity for Educational Institutes, maybe preferably ONLINE STUDY

6) I also don't have Friendships and NET WORK to Land me a Job

7) I try'd a JOB RECRUITER, and I was mainly offered 2-4 Jobs I didn't want, Mainly told to take ADMIN ADMINSTRATIVE/ADMINISTRATION, Entry Jobs which I didn't want, I was only fortunate to have 11 MONTH'S VOLUNTEER, In a RETAIL Role, that I didn't want, and I couldn't handle under a Payed Position with Professional Deadlines

😎 I know my Hobbies, and my Job PRO's and CON's, I haven't had any Experiences besides High School and Primary School and Hobbies, and lost

[MissBenthos]

Hi BabySteps,

What a struggle! It's super frustrating when the system seems to work against the people in it than with them. Covid on top sure doesn't help. I'm sorry it's been so tough, good on you for reaching out.

You mention having by law having to disclose illness to employers. Where has this come up for you? It's not something I've ever done.

You sound like someone who has a lot of integrity, it's an admirable trait, one I wish more people had. It's worth being aware that a lot of people out there do not follow "the rules". To find out that others have NOT gone to the same lengths of trouble I have and yet still reap the same benefit can be disheartening. I bring this up because I know there are some who lie on their resumes/job interviews or stretch the truth in their favour, make false driving time when getting their licence or blatently drive without a licence. I look at it now as I have done the right thing and it won't come back to bite me later as it may for them, knowing that I stay true to myself is a strength not a weakness.

On that same line of thought there are skills that I see as disingenuous at first glance but can be used for good. For example; sales people have the skill of persuasion which is fantasic when they are selling a genuinely good product or service. You may already know these things so I might be getting a little off track, but if not, learning some soft skills in communication can really go a long way in helping with the job hunt.

May I ask why you didn't want those entry level jobs you were offered? It is quite ok to start somewhere that isn't your preference and continue the search while working, it gives you a little something to add to your experience and that experience might help in landing a position you do want.

All the best xo

[BabySteps]

Thanks for Replying, for me I have a lot of concerns

I'm saddened because I'm fortunate to have DSP, but I have been as I've said Miss Diagnosed with Psychoses at 18 and than Schizophrenia at 19. At 21 I was told to be placed on Compulsory Pills, and at 22 I contracted Pre Diabetes Type-2, than at 24 I was told about a alarming over sized Polyp, that's now beyond 15 mm, and I've been over Due by One Year to have my Gall Bladder Surgery. I'm made to take the Pill every Night, I'm taking one now as I express this Reply. Than I've also been Delayed by One Year to continue my Driving, AND I've had the Wrong Instructors, and so much else that didn't go In my favor, than I had a Occupational Therapist expressing concern to potentially get VIC ROAD's to Restrict my Permit. I don't have my Driver's License I've had the Wrong Toxic Friends which Killed my Self Esteem, and I had to walk away from them since 2017, but I never can have Confidence when Interacting with people I don't like. I don't have Direction for where I want to Work In relation for Entry Jobs or what I can handle, I don't want UNIVERSITY or TAFE, I don't have Prior Experience or a Payed Work History, I don't have 2-3 Friends who I'm Happy with In relation to shared Character, Values and Similarities of Interests. I've never had Women Experience

I can't be confident because
( My Handling PERSONAL PROBLEM's )
I don't know how to handle almost majority of Life's challenges In Relation to

1) Finding Suitable Employment

2) Finding a Second Job

3) Paying Bills

4) Handling a Salary

5) Managing my Time effectively

6) Finding 2-3 Minority Friends

7) Finding a Minority Girl of Attraction and Internal Nature, Character, Values and Loyalty

😎 Having Self Esteem to be Myself

I've never had a Life, Never had Friends, never Traveled, My Mum Cooks my Dinners and does Laundry, and It's hard to take Responsibility, She's not Toxic at all, but she's very much taking Responsibility, She's the only one that generally wants me Happy and my Brother, but It's so hard when I know my Ideals with how I want to handle House Hold Responsible Chores and can't

[Sophie_M]

Hi BabySteps,

We are so sorry to hear that you have so many concerns. It sounds like these thoughts might leave you feeling quite overwhelmed. It's good to have goals and a vision of how you might like your life to look, but we'd recommend taking small steps towards the goals you have mentioned. We hope that you can be gentle with yourself and take things one moment at a time.

Can we ask, do you have any mental health support? We understand it can be really tough to cope sometimes, especially if you don't have a lot of support from family or friends. If you would like some help finding mental health support, we would recommend that you get in contact with the Beyond Blue Support Service. They are available 24/7 by phone on 1300 22 4636 or on Webchat 3pm-12am AEST on our website: www.beyondblue.org.au/getsupport 
They will give you support and point you in the right direction for help in your area.

In addition to this, there are always counsellors available via phone for your most difficult moments. Some of these 24/7 services include:  

•  Lifeline - 13 11 14 / https://www.lifeline.org.au/Get-Help/Online-Services/crisis-chat (online chat available 7pm-12am) 
•  Suicide Call Back Service - 1300 659 467

Many of our members have also been through a lot in their lives and will be able to talk through these feelings with you. If you would like to post further, please tell us more about what's on your mind and how we can best help support you.

[BabySteps]

Oh! I'm Sorry not to be Alarming, I do have those challenges and concerns at the moment but I'm not Suicidal, I understand your Safety of Mind, I'm Sorry for being concerning, Just trying to have Feedback, I overthink about so many things, I'm sorry for provoking Concern, I'm Just somehow trying to take everything Day by Day, I have my Family and I'm not Mentally Destructive Just Anxious, Appreciate your consideration, All Is hopefully going to possibly turn around. Thanks for Your Reply even so. Again Sorry about that level of provoked concern

[MissBenthos]

Hi BabySteps,

I feel your overwhelm. Is there 1 of these things you can focus on working on? Which one of these is most important to you? It's too much for anyone to look at all the elements compiled like that.

[BabySteps]

I Just feel tremendous Aniexty, with the Economy, and because I'm 25* and haven't had a Payed Job outside 11 Months Volunteer, I'm still trying to get my Driving together, and there's so many Problems In Life I'm not sure how to Resolve without some form of Support, I only have my Brother after my Parent's, As I don't have a Social Life or a Partner. I've had 4 Major Reasons for why I've unfortunately never worked. It was Impossible for me without Driving, without Net Work, without knowing which Entry Jobs I'm suitable for and that are Manageable for me as a Individual, and only now trying to guess a Direction without knowing, Plus Prior I had Mental Health Issues, and was In and out of the Mental Ward for 3 Years, over 5 Years Ago and despite my Issues, I'm dealing with a Miss Diagnoses that Nobody knows for sure beyond my own Mind. And I have had serious Health Complications from the Anti Psychotics with contracting Pre Diabetes Type-2, I've been mistakenly taking Tablets for 8 Years, My Psychiatrist means well and his Good, but would never believe my beliefs, It's complicated, couldn't explain my errors without diss belief to anyone, The Quality of my Life Is at Zero beyond my Mother and Brother and my Father's Stability, I'm Just In competent, because I've been to Primary School and High School, but since 8 Years Ago, I haven't been able to Start my Life, I've never known how to resolve Issues, and I feel overwhelmed by The Responsibility and Long Term In different Issues and Personal challenges, I sometimes get advice from my Cousin but that's only so much you know, I have a sense for a lack of Social Justice, and Political Correction and I know how the Government has a Biast for the International Students, which Plays with my Fears due to completive competition. I don't believe my Father even Cares, he Just Is a Selfish Person, and my Mother Is as lost as me, and partially doesn't have belief In me maybe that's my Insecurity or not. I'm not completely Lost though, because I have a great Understanding for Nutrition, and I can Cook enough to Manage my Diabeties, I have a Interest In TAFE, and maybe a sense for a Entry Job I'd like to hope for, Hoping after the Driving I could contemplate to Study for a Cert IV and turn my Anxiety or ease It. I'm a difficult Person In relation to handling Problems and Direction, and Driving takes a lot more Practice for me, But I wouldn't deem myself as Special Just Unique and In different yet within the Normal

[MissBenthos]

I'm also quite interested in politics and equality. When I wasn't feeling well one thing that helped was cutting out political media. Even a majority of news media. Because those things push me further down when I'm not in the right headspace, the injustice in our world weighs heavily and reporting on these topics tends to be on extreme ends because that's what gets attention of the masses. Do you think you could benefit from removing some of this media as well? Connecting with people in your community through mutual interest groups (simple things like craft, gardening, sports) can be more grounding than consuming media or viewing public online conversation.

I like your plan to finish the driving then possibly go on to do a cert IV. I think you're heading in the right direction. The hardships are still there but having goals despite them will give you more to feel proud of at the end of the day. Pushing on is a great strength I hope you give yourself credit for.

[Guest_4643]

Hello BabySteps, and welcome. Sounds like you're dealing with a lot and I'm sorry to hear that.

If it makes you feel any better, I'm 21 and I also don't drive (never even practiced) because of my anxiety, and I haven't had a job because of my mental health issues either. I feel like a failure because of this amongst other things. You're not though. You're not alone, and that's ok that you don't have a job and your licence. I hope things work out for you and you can somehow get your licence and feel safe on the roads, and a job you like doing. It's very hard to find a job these days, plus with COVID.

In terms of the misdiagnosis, that's so sad and I'm so sorry. I would definitely be complaining about that, you have every right to, and say to VicRoads or whoever, that you feel like you're being discriminated against, you're well within your rights.

That is unacceptable that someone who should be a professional misdiagnosed you, that should never happen under any circumstances, mental health or not. I'm sorry that happened to you, it's not ok at all. I can't imagine how scary and stressed you must be because of it and that's not right, giving you a diagnosis you don't even have and causing you unneccessary stress etc you don't need.

I hope things work out for you. I'm so sorry.

[BabySteps]

I was Miss Diagnosed because I had Fixated Thoughts and High Aniexty and Some form of Depression, I was a severe Loner and a Poeser In High School, didn't like anyone and always feeling Isolated and Bullied by In different Peer Friends plus other Kids for a brief duration over those Secondary Years, Despite most others not having any Issues with me, and despite being fairly Un known, Nobody really had Issues with me Beyond One Arrogant Popular Kid and those Minorities

Me and my Brother used to walk around the School Oval until Lunch was over for 45* Minutes, sometimes Sit Inside the Toilet Cubicles, or me and my Brother Just Isolated and hided away from being without Company and even when I used to sit In the Library constantly bothered

Than after High School Toxic Friends, who deflated my Self Esteem and Value behind my Personality and feelings and Opinions and possibly Worth, Leaving me feeling Mentally Negatively Shitty

I was Bullied Physically and Verbally by In different people, My Father was Stressed with School Cost's and Borrowed $600 of my Mother's Mum, our Grandma and than never Payed her back, My Father and his Friend's were discussing to kick me and my Brother out of a decent School for a Complete shit school, I was the Biggest Wagger or High School Skipper, Just didn't have Interest In the Curriculum but I wanted my Year 12 Graduation, Didn't like anyone In the School at all, I was really Physically demented beyond the way I am nowadays back than, I was Pale and 57 kg, My Dad treated me as Aneroxic, I was a Destructive Behavioural Problem due to Just Youth Insensibility and Un Happiness

• I read about this Hot Girl who committed Suicided, and I became Infatuated Beyond Understanding, I've been Into her since 8 Years Ago In relation to Physicality, and I was halfly Suicidual, making 2-3 Attempts and I couldn't think and I was Entrapped In my Weird Struggling Personality, I was obesssed with what Happened to the Girl and Ideally was In Love without knowing the Stranger
• I also had No Independence, No Money, No Employment, No Ideal Company, No Outside Activity, I didn't care for a lot of Reasons, despite making the choice to not care
• I get Undermined by most people as this being fabricated, because they didn't live under my Shoes

I always felt afraid to be Out Spoken and Interact with People

I never could be Musically Creative without knowing how to do Certain things, and with feeling Under Confident to