Can't afford to lose more family members

BlueNinjaX2912 · ‎12-10-2015

Right now, it has been over a year since this tragic event has happened.

For two/three years, my Nana was diagnose with cancer. Early March in 2014, she lost her battle and passed away. She was the closest grandmother I had. The one who cared for me, who loved me, who was always there when things got tough. So hard to lose her.

A few months later, my mum's uncle passed away from a heart attack. The weight of struggle have added more to my shoulders. I was becoming more stressed.

A while later, my idol and favourite actor, Robin Williams committed suicide which took me off guard. I was not expecting this to happened. He was the reason why I wanted to become an actor. And now, I don't know why... The weights was again added.

And before Christmas, one of my aunt passed away from liver failure. More weight was added.

It proves that 2014 was not my best year for me. I thought 2015 would be a year ignore the pain and more on. I was wrong.

As the year was coming to an end, my mum's cousin (the son of my mum's late uncle) passed away from heart problems.

Right now, after what has happened to my family, I was worried of who going to be next. Will it be my dad? My mum? My siblings? My cousins? Aunts? Uncles? Anyone I know? I'm bottling all this anxiety inside of me and I haven't been myself lately - even though I have always put on a brave face for most of the time.

I could really use a talk... anything to get this off my mind...

White_Rose · ‎12-10-2015

Dear Blue Ninja

I am so sorry that you have lost all those people who were close to you. It is so hard when loved ones pass away. Then when you think this sorrow has stopped to have someone else pass away must feel as though the world is out to get you.

Can I remind you that, with the exception of Robin Williams, all these people were elderly and although they all had different illnesses, would in the nature of things not live very much longer. I realise this sounds a bit hard and I want to say I understand this does not make their passing any easier. My reason for saying this is to try to reassure you that death is not going to keeping revisiting you and your family.

You have been through a horrible period of losing people and many others would be equally as wary of the future. Please try and consider why your parents, siblings, aunts and uncles should die in the near future. If they are basically well, then why would this happen?

I understand that you have been greatly shocked by the events of 2014 and I suspect I would have similar feelings to yours in your situation. You do not say how old you are. Not that this makes any difference to how you feel, I would like to direct you to a suitable place to get some help and reassurance.

The first port of call is always your GP. This is the most frequently given suggestion here and it is because your GP has a wealth of experience in helping people plus access to all sorts of services. If you are under 25 you may like to call the Kids Helpline on 1800 55 1800 or the Beyond Blue helpline on 1300 22 4636. Both services have a 24/7 availability.

Grief has a huge effect on us and that can last for some time. Having someone to talk to can be an enormous help. So feel free to write in here as often as you wish. I will answer when I can and others will also offer you support. Please start with a visit to your GP.

Mary