Members new and old, introduce yourselves here

[Chris_B]

Hi everyone,

This is (what will hopefully become) a mega-thread for members, new and old, to introduce themselves.  I'll kick off:

My name is Chris Banks and I’m the online communities manager at beyondblue. Basically, I’m here to help out, contribute to discussions, and answer any questions you may have about beyondblue. I work with a team of moderators behind-the-scenes who keep the forums running 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.

I’m 37, originally from New Zealand, and have worked as a filmmaker, journalist, and musician.  I’ve spent a good chunk of time working in the mental health sector too. I have lived experience of bipolar disorder, depression and anxiety, and have been living in Melbourne for nearly two years. In my spare time I enjoy movies, music, hanging out with mates, and I barrack for Hawthorn, much to the disgust of some of our regular members!

I’m not a psychologist or counsellor (although I have seen a fair few of them), so I can’t give medical advice. Like everyone else here, I can provide peer support only.
I really enjoy being part of the community and virtually meeting the many different people of all ages who come through everyday, even if they're not feeling the best when they arrive on the doorstep. Hopefully in your time here you'll feel less alone, and pick up some tips and encouragement for the journey.  

(passes on the talking stick)

PLEASE NOTE: This thread is for introductions only, if you have an issue you would like to discuss ongoing with the community, please start a new thread with your topic in the appropriate section.

[HA1]

Hello Clayhay

Welcome and thank you for your post.

I would really like to speak to you more. because I think I can see where yo u are coming from..  Can you please start a new thread under the category of depression. Feel free to copy and paste you current post into this new thread.

Please post back again.

K

[Monoglot]

Hi all, 

I'm Darren, in QLD. 
 
I am suffering from chronic depression, anxiety and possibly add. I am coming off antidepressants and  I am awaiting for a rerferral to a new psychiatrist, and currently seeking counselling but I always have a feeling that nothing is going to work. 

I find it hard to leave bed, and have very little interest in anything any more. I have very few good friends that I see, and many of my friends are meth addicts, so I have to stay away from them, as I am also a recovering addict. I have not able to find a job for years and I have recently unenrolled from my studies as I am unable to concentrate or find motivation. 

I feel very hopeless. I feel like I will always be this way. 

 

[beyondjazz]

Hey Darren,

Sounds like things are pretty tough at the moment! I know I used to feel like I always have and always would feel this way. I found having something to look forward to really helped - even if it was just a coffee at my favourite cafe, or watching one of my favourite (terrible) TV shows. 

I also know coming off anti-depressents can be really hard, and made me feel even worse than usual. Make sure you have some people or services you can call if things get really tough. 

Hope things improve for you soon, 

[Mr_Redline]

Hi!

Im not sure if this is gonna help but hopefully I'll be able to get a shove in the right direction. After meeting with a couple of mental health professionals it turns out my anger and depression (Which I hide VERY well - Most people think Im Mr Always Happy and thats just fine by me) is caused by extreme stress. This came as a massive suprise to me because I always figured my stress was all work related and at no particular time do I feel stressed. I've since changed careers and this ridiculous and pointless anger hasnt gone away and somewhere on a subconscious level, Im still stressed out!

In what may be considered a breakthrough, we worked out that a lot of this anger, depression and anxiety could concievably come from my mother who seems to fit the characteristics of a narcissist.

 I've looked online and there are "checklists" etc that point to narcissism but some of it is off the mark. Two thirds are spot on...

Now I'd never admit it outside of an anonymous forum but Im fiercly proud and would never blame anyone for my problems but looking into it further Im starting to think that perhaps this is correct - My mother is kind of a cross between a narcissist and a sociopath and dealing with her as a kid and then into adult life has left it's mark.

What Im taking too long to ask is - are there varying levels of narcissism? Can they display a percentage of characteristics at varying degrees and have other traits that dont usually fit the bill? Her history is lends itself to someone who would end up with this condition, father died at an early age, struggled in life etc etc..

My fear is if she IS the issue, how the hell do I "Break up" with her? My goal is to make life better for my own family and if it means cutting her off to do it then Im prepared to do that but I do feel that trying to reason with her would be as useful as reasoning with a lawnmower..

Anyway, I'll check back here later - If anyone has any suggestions - Im ALL ears...

[Retro_Rhonda]

I have suffered from medically diagnosed severe depression for 12 years.  In January this year they confirmed I also had Bipolar.  I have had several breakdowns over the last four years and at times I wonder how on earth I am still here.  I am a single mum who is older and I find this procludes me from a lot of group treatments where I live.  I had a pretty major episode  two months ago and dont seem to have had much follow up after 2 week stay in hospital.  My major major problem at the moment in severe anxiety, the only time and place I don't feel the anxiety is when I am in my bed.  I am reaching out hoping I can hear of some hopeful experiences or news.  I am trying but I feel I am losing.

beyondblue's clinically-trained moderators often work offline (invisible to you) on issues relating to suicide or self-harm. At the same time, general supportive comments from the community are encouraged. If you have concerns around suicide or self-harm, please phone our support service on 1300 22 4636.

[Charisse87]

Hello

I'm Charisse and I am 27 years old.

I lost my mother to cancer at age 20.

My Dad started dating 3 months later and remarried soon after, since then my sisters and I are fending for ourselves. But we have each other and we had our Nan.

Nan (my Mum's mum) passed away in 2013, my substitute mother.

I have been on an antidepressant for 6 years for anxiety and depression,  keen to be rid of it for good eventually.

Would like to give assistance to anyone who needs to chat and connect with others suffering the loss of loved ones.

[Jacko777]

Hi Retro Rhonda,

Welcome to the Beyond Blue forum, there are lots of people on this site that have had similar experiences to yourself and will find support and advice here. Sounds like you have had a very tough time, I send you much love. Keep in mind, if your anxiety is unbearable you can/should ring the Beyond Blue phone service, they are there to help you.

Perhaps you could post on the main forums page, choose the most appropriate section for your story, (eg. Depression), and click through to it. At the top right you will see a button marked 'New thread'. Click that, and you will be able to post your story and give it a title.

Jacko

[Puppy_love]

I'm a newbie: I'm 47 and had a medical condition (damages to the brain) which was contributed to a major break down 13 years ago. I think I've done well with medication and therapy over the years but about 3years ago my husband started to become distant. he had enough about 8 months ago and we separated. Since then I haven't coped very well as he has said he has had enough of my depression.  What else can I do. I see a psychologist , a psychiatrist and have recently had meds changed. Anyone have any ideas about what else I can do to get better. 

[geoff]

dear Beyondjazz, I am sorry to be so late in responding back to you, but I just want to tell you that your amazing story and it is amazingwhen you stand back and look at what you have overcome and now achieved means that you have the strength and determination to get yourself back on the right track.

It would be great if you could reply to people on the main forum, as your advice would be so much appreciated. Geoff.

[White_Rose]

Dear Mr Redline

Thank you for writing in and a warm welcome to Beyond Blue. Sadly we have dysfunctional parents who play a large part in the future problems of their children. Once you have recognised this I think you are on the road to some recovery.

There are a number of threads on the site that discuss similar situations to yours.  They refer to either Narcissistic Personalities or Borderline Personality Disorder in parents. Look under Supporting Family and Friends/Narcissistic Personality Disorder and Narcissistic Victim Syndrome.  It's an old thread but still on the first page of this forum.

Also on this forum there is Does anyone on here have a parent with Narcissistic  Personality Disorder.  This on the second page and there is a link to another thread from this one.  I am sure there are others so Please explore the site. Join in the conversation and get the benefits of others' experiences.

Alternatively you can start your own thread.  There are a number of threads about parents or spouses with Borderline Personality Disorder and while this is not precisely the same, there are many similarities in recognising and managing the relationship. For some people the only successful way to manage is to cut the relationship altogether.

I hope that helps.

Mary