I just need to talk

[sad_and_knowone_to_talk_t]

I just have knowone to talk to

[white knight]

Hi, welcome

I'm here. I'll check my phone every hour or so for your posts. Looking forward to it.

Anything on your mind?

TonyWK

[sad_and_knowone_to_talk_t]

I keep causing fights with my husband. Its never his fault. I dont know where to begin. Im annoyed that he is coaching basketball. I dont know why. I used to take my son to basketball then when my daughter was born 4 years ago he said he was starting to coach. I was struggling with my new born. Then he had to start coaching another team. Then another team. I know I'm just annoyed at him but I th I nk the problem or issue is a lot deeper than that and I can't work it out. My sister came over the other week and there was was some change with the time but that didn't really bother me. He was so rude and saying tell her not to come. If I did that I would of been in trouble with her. He says I dont stand up for myself and I dont really with my family. Then I said I have to let mum and dad pick up the girls sometimes I the afternoon and he was rude about that. My head is going around I circles and I could go on and on. My daughter used to do dancing and I took her out for basketball instead because he never went to anything of hers because of basketball. If I bring it up it comes out all wrong and we just end up fighting and he says I need help and that I'm not supportive of him and so on. I do suffer from depression and anxiety. I feel like he gets to do anything he wants I and dont. Its my own fault for not really having much of anything in the way of sport or anything else. I know there are people here that have much bigger problems than me.

[jaz28]

Hi there,

I am here to talk, I try and check the forums every day!

Are you OK? What is bothering you?

Jaz.

[Petal22]

Hi sad and knowone to talk to,

Wellcome to our forums!

Im really sorry you are feeling this way I understand.

I understand the fights with your husband, you need some “me time” aswell…….. maybe your husband could support you more by having the children more so you can do something for yourself?

I believe it goes both ways……. He needs to support you aswell, you also need to get out and about….

I think that’s a really nice gesture that you want your parents to pick up the girls sometimes…. They would love it and it would help your kids to so they can spend some time with grandparents and it gives you a rest… if your husband is unhappy about it have you asked him his reasons?

This isn’t your fault I think things at home need to be divided evenly so you can take up some thing? it’s give and take and maybe your husband may need to understand that he needs to cut back on his hobbies so you can do something you enjoy….. he also needs to support you..

If your daughter enjoys dancing then do dancing your children’s interests are important too.

Im sorry you suffer with anxiety and depression have you spoken to a health professional about the way you are feeling?

[sad_and_knowone_to_talk_t]

I dont know. Somehow I get myself into these dark holes and I get so angry and cause fights with my husband. I just don't know.

[Sophie_M]

Hi sad and knowone to talk to,

We are so sorry to hear about what you're going through; it sounds like it has been a tough time. Thank you for being part of our forums, it takes a lot of courage and strength to reach out for support and we are so glad that you have done so. The community will be here to listen and chat with you. You can also reach out to Beyond Blue on 1300 22 4636 if you would like some further support.

[sad_and_knowone_to_talk_t]

I have had depression and anxiety for about 20 years. I was on antidepressants for a long time but went off them when I was pregnant with my 7 year old and had to bo back on them when she was born j was not in a good state. Then went off them again with the 4 year old. I have never really found anyone that I could feel comfortable with to talk to. If I say to him I want to do something he would say of course and wouldn't stop me but there is no time left in the week. by the time I work 3 days a day to catch up on life, swimming, gymnastics and basketball. I hold on to stuff and find it hard to let go. I dont know why I'm so upset about him coaching my son in rep basketball and domestic. I dont know how to tell my husband stuff, it gets so mixed up in my head and never comes out right. And then he has this way of turning it around and putting it back on me. Dont get me wrong he is a good man, never done anything to me. He says I always get my way and I feel like he always gets his way. mine y was a huge issue and pressure for so long and isn't as much of a problem anymore. im working more and a few other things. Most of the time there is no problem, we don't fight that much. I find it so hard expressing my self to him or anyone face to face. I actually am in a reasonably good spot in my life for the first time and I shouldn't do the whole poor me thing and im not trying to do that but when I emotionally fall off my perch it's hard and it sucks. Im a reasonably private person for a lot of reasons. I have lost a lot of friends moving jobs. My sister-in-law's are good but I would never to talk to them about this. My sister and I have a very strained relationship for a lot of reasons also. I feel like I'm the common problem in all this. I try so hard to be a good person, daughter, wife, sister, in-law. But I feel like it always backfires me. But then how much is it just my head messing with me.

[Petal22]

I’m sorry that you have had anxiety and depression for almost 20 years, i understand it’s hard to deal with.

I suffered with severe anxiety OCD but have now recovered from this condition after receiving the professional help I needed.

Are you still off your antidepressant?

I understand it’s difficult to try to understand were our emotions are coming from and why we feel the way we do. Instead of talking to your husband about the way you are feeling have you thought about writing him a letter…….?

[Haydeneast]

Hey I have been there myself I'm available to chat with keep your chin up it will get better