First Time Ever Forum User

[Missymoon]

Hi, have never used any online forum, looking to talk to people who know what people with depression are going thru or have gone thru

[Lstewie]

Hi there, this is my first post too, i have depression so i may know what your going through

[dragonflies]

Hey guys, you're not alone out there trust me. I joined these forums around a month ago now and the support you can receive is comforting. Also chatting with people who are going through what you may be going through too - people you can relate too. I have had depression for around the last 5/6 years - I'm now a young adult. I have only recently been able to accept that this is a part of me.

What would you like to talk about Missymoon and Lstewie? Would you like to chat about what has been going on lately? How you are? Feel free to share more if you want to.

[Croix]

Dear Missymoon (with a Hi to Lstewie)~

Thank you for coming here to the Forum. It can seem a confusing place to start with, and for many it is a difficult thing to talk about themselves. It can be worth the effort though as there are plenty here who suffer the same sorts of illnesses and can both understand and say how they have gotten on, particularly what has worked for them.

Trying to talk to someone who is fortunate enough never to have had depression is hard, there is no common ground and trying to explain everything is exhausting and not always successful. Here I guess you can almost talk shorthand, the experiences are similar and there is no silly or unrealistic judgment.

I've had PTSD, anxiety and bouts of depression for a very long time, and found I needed not only family support, but medical support too, with meds and therapy on an ongoing basis.

Would you like to say a little more about yourself? Perhaps if you have been diagnosed and are under treatment. If you have a family and if so how you get on. The problems you face - that sort of thing. Knowing more about you means we can talk more sensibly.

While you are here you might like to browse around the Depression Section of this Forum to see how others have coped.

Dear Lstewie~

I guess everything I've said to Missymoon might also be said to you. Do you think you might like to make your own thread like Missymoon has and start a conversation of your own?

Thanks

Croix

[White_Rose]

Dear Missymoon and Lstewie

A warm welcome to both of you. This is a great place to ask questions and talk to others who have walked your road. We are a friendly bunch and we have had different experiences even though they all come under the general heading of depression.

Beyond Blue has a large store of information about depression which may be useful to read. You can also ask for booklets to be sent to you, no charge. There is a booklet for friends and families which may be helpful to these folk. And if you want to chat with someone there is the BB helpline 1300 22 4636, available 24/7.

Like Croix I have depression though not PTSD. There are days when I feel I cannot function and must push myself to carry out even the simplest tasks. I do think, "What's the point, I'll have a day off" but I have also found it helps if I complete tasks or whatever. Keeping to your usual routine is helpful because it gives some structure to your day and opportunities to drag your mind away from the roundabout of unwanted thoughts.

Easy to say of course but not easy to do. If you can start to make this a habit you will find it easier as you go. It can also be rewarding by saving the energy you expend on forcing yourself to stop thinking. The trick really is to substitute a different, more pleasant thought. Plan your next holiday, how to de-clutter your wardrobe, what can you buy for a birthday present. All alternatives, and far more pleasurable to having the black dog in your mind barking loudly and drowning the good thoughts.

I hope both of you will continue to talk to us.

Mary

[Stuckinaloop]

Hi

This is my first time here and to be honest, I don't know if I should even be here. I am a bloke, a mature man that feels awkward even being here, but I am not coping very well. I thought I was handling things but I am not. I have noone to talk to and even though I tried to talk to my wife years ago whenI first had trouble, it did not go well so I am scarred of talking to her about it. Even now I am crying and I have the gist of why but it is so many things that I can't get it real clear in my head.

I decided to come here and try to talk to people that are like minded with this problem and jut try to have someone to talk to and not get false platitudes from. There are so many things now and they are cliched by everyone else and everything else and everyone says to go to your doctor. Well I did that the first time and then got shoved to a psychologist who did not give me answers just listed and told me what she needed to tell me, she didn't really "listen". This was about 10 years ago and I just don't know what to do. I have tried back and forth with different strategies to help myself and now they have run out. I am struggling with this especially with the bloke thing

[LuLu_]

Welcome! I am quite new as well. From looking around different threads I have found that so many people of different ages and genders are included in this community. Every individual belongs and has a right to be. Everyone deserves to be here and deserves to receive support. I understand feelings of hopelessness and utter confusion.

I am so sorry for your bad experience with your psychologist. That must have been quite discouraging. My first psychologist did not help me at all. She made me feel so much worse. I thought I was losing my mind. She didn't help me figure out anything. She confused me and I was a mess. However I changed to another psychologist. As soon as I met her we clicked. She let me speak. She let me dump everything on the table and she helped me sort it out. I understand your experience has probably stopped any thoughts of going back to someone for support. But I urge you to find a new psychologist. Similarly to everyday life some people just do not click. Some individuals think differently and some psychologists have approaches that just aren't suited. Sometimes it will take a person a few tries before they find the right support that works for them. There are a million different ways we can try to get us on the right path.

Personally I like to figure everything out on my own. But I couldn't figure out my mental health. It was too consuming. I needed extra support and if thats what is takes there is no shame in that.

I am sorry if I have been unhelpful and discouraged you. But I hope if you take one thing away that it is that you should be here if you want to be here. Everyone is welcome.

[White_Rose]

Dear Stuck

Welcome to Beyond Blue. Is it OK to shorten your name? If you are coping, or not coping for that matter, with a mental illness then this is a good place for you. Explore the site and read the information about depression and anxiety, take the K10 test to see your score on the depression or anxiety checklist. Not a diagnostic tool but gives a good indication. Home page, scroll down to depression and anxiety and go from there. It's always useful to be informed as much as possible.

I am a mature person also. Retired from paid employment some years ago and now work in various roles but unpaid. What's wrong with this statement? 😊 Understanding of MI has increased hugely in recent years and it is easier to talk about in general. The unfortunate part is when your partner has not had a MI and finds it difficult to understand. And this is where we come in. We have a common illness and understand others who need to manage their lives without being overwhelmed. It's good to talk to someone who has been there.

Listening is something a psychologist is supposed to do. Sadly, as in all professions, there are the good, the bad and the mediocre. When you find someone who 'gets' you, hang on to him/her. Why not try again? Have a chat to your GP and explain what has been happening. Ask her which psychs are considered good. GPs always know the good specialists, or at least my GP does. How do you feel about going to a psychiatrist? Much cheaper as their fees are always refunded, in part, by Medicare. Not so with psychologists as even on a Mental Health plan you can only have ten subsidised visits.

I go to a psychiatrist but I must admit I was not happy at first. Actually I have been to two psychiatrists, one many years ago. In my opinion he was pretty useless. My current psych is very good and doesn't miss anything. I count myself fortunate in that regard.

Please continue to post.

Mary

[White_Rose]

Hello Lulu

Nice to meet you and thanks for your post. I will reply tomorrow. Bed calls.

Mary

[Stuckinaloop]

Thank you LuLu and Mary,

Yes, Stuck is fine.

I understand what you are both saying, and thank you for the warm welcome. I was thinking more of a psychiatrist then a psychologist this time more so in my believe they may have more experience but more so to try someone different. I guess I really do need someone to actually listen and give me some real direction as I feel so lost. I was dreaming last night of just walking away. Pack a knapsack and just go...where I really don't know. I have this urge to find myself but I don't even know how to do that. I know I need help but it is just finding it. I guess you both know what I mean. I will keep going for now.

Thanks