First post, feeling worn down.

[012DnR]

I am feeling unsure of myself with indecision and little self confidence being my daily companions. I have suffered betrayal, loss and major changes and they have taken their toll. The last few years have been a mammoth struggle just to survive. At times I coped and reacted poorly, which added extra time to my sentence of recovery and rebuilding my life - myself - is a work in progress. I am exhausted and weary and now I need recovery companions. People who know exactly what it is to be here where I am and perhaps I will be able to use a little of my own experience to help someone else.

[jc2000]

Hi 012DnR,

You sound really excited for your camping, and it also sounds like you really need it, I hope you enjoy yourself, you deserve it.

You said you've done counselling in the past, are you still going? have you brought up your concerns with your counsillor? You also said that you're off of medication now; is that because you were getting better/ felt you didn't need them anymore? I'm not experienced with the medicated side of things, but maybe you could talk to your doctor about going back onto them and starting with a small dosage and see how that goes?

I hope to hear from you soon,

Julia

[Salsal]

Dear 012, I can't hold back the tears reading your story. While not the same, my story parallels yours in so many ways. And the result for me has been absolute abandonment and destruction of everything I valued. I can feel my own mental health problems on the horizon.

17 years of love loyalty and guidance provided to my man has been repaid by shutting down communication, violence against stuff in our home, walkouts, blame, and the roller-coaster of broken promises large and small.

The diagnosis is bipolar but he resists treatment.

I'm now in the process of trying to live alone (I hate it), while struggling to come to terms with it all and clearing out our home that we can no longer afford now he's gone. Yesterday he texted to tell me he'd lost his job.

To read your story allowed me to believe I am not alone.

Thank you so much.

Salsal