Hello MoanaMa and welcome to the Beyond Blue forums. The forums are a safe place to discuss any issues you wish, in a secure and caring environment. I'm glad that you found the courage to post here and I hope you find comfort in knowing that you are not alone. There are many kind and understanding members here who are very happy to lend you their support and encouragement as you go through a pretty tough time right now.
You are going through a number of experiences which tend to be precursors to depressive episodes, especially for those of us who already suffer from depression.
I am sorry to hear that you are going through an issue with fair trading and subsequent bullying and harrassment from another party involved. Bullying is a serious problem which can have ongoing mental and physical impacts. You have a right to feel safe and to be treated fairly and respectfully. Victims of bullying often feel hopeless or stuck in a situation with no escape. Often with feelings of confusion and being stressed out about determining what to do about it.
MoanaMa, I dont know much about your bullying situation obviously, but is it possible for you to talk to someone you know well and trust about this situation? They may be able to give you some much needed support and possibly have some suggestions you hadn't already considered for helping with the situation. Depending upon the cirumcstances, and provided you feel safe and confident, you may be able to approach the person or corporation who is bullying you. Explain to them that their behaviour is unwanted and not acceptable, and that it goes against the fair trading decision.
I hope you are recovery well from your major surgery? Given that you are still on strong pain medication, I expect you are not too long out of surgery. And yes, strong pain medication can indeed mess with our heads. Given that you have suffered from depression in the past however, it is highly likely that the combination of factors in play right now is leading to another bout.
Have you officially been diagnosed with depression through a GP, psychologist or psychiatrist? If so, have you had any specific treatment - medication, therapy, self help? Whatever worked for you last time, will most likely work for you again. So if you have gotten out of former good habits through illness or lack of time, I'd suggest adopt them again. If you feel that is not working, definitely speak to your GP about it.
Wishing you the best.
Taurus
