I chose integrity & respect of myself in relationships & have now have no true connections.
If only I could go back to the 1990's. Connected times with the best friend I ever had & family.
After trying to connect with people I am exhausted psychologically. I am now in a place in my life where I do not want to give very much of anything to life in general. I do however make sure I get up & keep going every day. What for I am not sure, I guess just for myself 💛
Hello Bridget Anne, welcome to the site.
If only we could go back in time when everything was exactly how we wanted it to be, but times change, as does our situation in life as well as our circumstances do, and even so, we can't predict what's gong to happen in 10 years time, whether that's good or bad, depends on the person.
To get up out of bed and keep going is a bonus fr you,however, if you are beginning to feel is hard to give much back in life, could be the beginning of feeling somewhat depressed in some way, even though I'm not a doctor to qualify this, just know from when it happened to me.
If it's started to happen, some people believe it will go away, but if it's been happening for a while, then now is your opportunity to visit your doctor, who can access you and then make a decision.
The sooner you can do this the better it is for you and if you want to google this 'k10 assessment' it's an online test for depression, try and do it several times but at different stages in how you feel, because if you do it one after another you might get the same result, so do it at any time of the day.
Take this result with you and also if you could write down any triggers and/or what's causing this on some paper, but in point form, that makes it easier for your doctor.
It would be good to hear back from you, whenever that's possible.
Hi Bridget Anne,
A warm welcome to you.
When you are feeling down like this it is hard to be motivated and interested in yourself and others, and in what's going on around you. It sounds like you are doing a good job of putting one foot in front of the other and moving yourself forward even though it is psychologically taxing for you right now. That takes will, strength and courage.
I agree with Geoff and suggest your GP might be a good place to start. They have resources and options that might help you start feeling better and back on track.
From your post, I'm feeling that perhaps people might have let you down in some way or many ways? Don't answer if you don't want to or don't feel up to it. I know from my own experience that other people may not hold the same standards for behaviour or values as you in how they treat or relate to others. You can't know this about them until they show you who they are and then you are already embroiled.
We are here to talk if you want to and to offer some support. From someone who has been there, it can and does get better. Take care.