This bipolar life

[Kazzl]

Are your moods are like an elevator with no control buttons? Mine are.

Ground floor ... I feel normal, content, just quietly getting on with ordinary, everyday life, loving my family and friends. This is as it should be. And maybe there's nothing wrong with me after all. Live.

Going up, top floor. Oh look! There's a shiny thing! I want to sing! Let's go buy stuff! Let's have a big party and invite the world! What could possibly go wrong! Woooooo hoooooooo! Play.

Going up (a different day) top floor. What do you mean you don't agree with me! I'm right! Why don't you think like me? Keep up! How can you be so illogical? I'll f-ing shred you if you don't do what I want! Rage.

Going down, lower ground floor. Flat, listless, can't be bothered. Can still function but it's a drag. Cope

Going down, basement. I'm never getting out of bed again. I'm useless, worthless. Total idiot, how could I ever imagine I could do anything, nothing ever goes right because I'm wrong. I'm a burden to everyone. Hide.

Welcome to my bipolar world. It's always been my world, but it's only recently I've seen it for what it is. About 15 years ago I was diagnosed with clinical depression during one of my 'basement' times. I had a lot of lower ground floor times too, on and off, and I kept out of the basement (so I thought) with alcohol. Until that took me into the blackest ever basement with only one obvious way out. Having survived doing something very dangerous I realised I had to stop drinking or I really would die.

I never took much notice of the playful times or the anger, that was just me, I was fun sometimes, and sometimes I was a devastating bitch. Ha! Deal with it people!

Well, yes, but in time the elevator started going up and down too quickly and, as I became more aware and more knowledgeable about mental health I realised this wasn't good. Doctor. Diagnosis. Bipolar 2. Lithium.

So, I've started this thread in the hope that other bipolar folks will join me, to share experiences and strategies. In my 'beginners' understanding, we are different from other fellow travellers of the back dog. While we experience depression as many others on this site do, the hypomanic or manic ups and, for some the rapid cycling that can happen, are experiences unto themselves.

I want to learn more, and I want to share with others. I hope my fellow elevators will join me here.
BTW, it's a ground floor day in my head today! Yay!

Love

Kaz

[quirkywords]

Velvet

It is terrible people can be so mean.

Asdff

I like routine too.

[Airies]

Velvet, take care and look after yourself, you’re number one. I crave routine, years of conditioning, not that I liked it. Asdff glad to see the back of this year,every year. Xmas and New year and all the stuff associated with it takes its toll. 
Physically my body is struggling. Once upon a time a non issue. More medical appointments, hopefully it’s a minor issue. It’s very warm here. All the best for the New Year 

[asdff]

Oh yes Airies the physical toll on our bodies, my parents have had knee replacements from years of use. They weren’t even old, when they had them done! Dad did so loads of exercise like us.This year has been a doozy. 

[quirkywords]

Happy new year to every knee.

Here is hoping 2023 is a year  with more positives than negatives, a year of moments of joy and being kind to oneself and others. 

Thank you to everyone for your support to each other and to meThis is a great supportive thread . I know many of us have struggled at times this year but your determination and ability,to offer kindness to others even when you are struggling is something I admire. 

[quirkywords]

You know you are too tired when you wish every knee instead of every one a happy new year,!
i love hearing auld lang syne sung in a Scottish accent.

i was wondering about one tip you may have to get motivated when you feel unmotivated. 

[velvetfaerie]

I thought the every knee was a nod to everyone's aging bodies. 

I'm just plodding along and being me. I've caught up with 5 long time friends / family who are decent. 

The bullies I've seen, there seems to be 2 manipulative ones who pull vulnerable people into their little cult to use as weapons. Either way, I'm no where near it and I think the boy has been suckered in. Tough lesson ahead for him.

[Airies]

Me, so much for watching what I eat. Exercised but undid a lot by visiting the confectionery aisle.I cooked yesterday and found out how hot and sharp discs brakes are on a bycyle. Like slicing through butter. It’s a coping mechanism and there’s a bit going on. I’ve distanced from a few people. If they can’t be bothered why should l.

just started the united cup tennis nice breath of fresh air

[quirkywords]

Velvet

I think saying good morning to everyone’s knee or heads or legs is a nice acknowledgement.

i love chocolate. Aries it is my downfall.

[Lisa611]

Hi All from Vietnam! I've just spent a week in Hanoi which is up north. Went on a lovely overnight cruise around Halong Bay. Today we are flying to Nha Trang it's on the beach. I hope everybody is doing ok. Happy new year! 

[quirkywords]

Lisa hi from cold Australia. Enjoy the food and your travels. Do you like the markets.