I just don't know anymore

[chrissy1]

I have been reading many threads, which makes me feel not so alone. I've had depression for 30 yrs. the last 5yrs have been chronic, that's why I'm in a nursing home.( no where else to go) I could not look after myself anymore. I have lost (commission unit)my unit my car and my baby dog. After many shock treatments, I am on medication which is keeping stable. I just don't have a life anymore. So alone. (Have lost my friends as I was out of action. I'm sure u guys can relate. I struggle with society that they just don't get it, what do we have to do to let them know this is REAL.( as if one could pretend with this illness) I don't think so!!! I really don't have a life

anymore. Being in a nursing home does not help cause when I leave my room I see so many older people around. It does not help my depression at all. That's all for now.thank you for ur time, looking forward to some replies.

my thread name is chrissy1 which some of you may have seen.

chrissy1

[Guest8901]

Dear Chrissy. I havent visited here in 6 days, for which I apologise. Although we have spoken on my thread in that time. Thank you for that btw. I really do appreciate you.

I read elsewhere (Karens thread I think) that you were to do an iPad course. Have you done that yet, and if so, how was it?

Please dont forget that you can post here any time Chrissy. And we would all appreciate a bit of an update about you and how you're going.

Hope to hear from you soon.

Kindest

Mandy. 🌾 💕

[Birdy77]

Dear Chrissy1,

I just want to say hi. 😊

THank's so very much for your support on the animal thread, I left you a reply there but don't know if you got it.

I hope you are ok.

I am happy to have a convo here on your thread if you like.

I've seen you on Amanda's thread and Grandy's too ...

I AM EVERYWHERE!! HAHAHA just kidding.

🌻birdy

[Guest8901]

Dear Chrissy, I have copied and pasted your post to me from my thread below. I am concerned for you and thought it best to bring this conversation to your own personal support thread. You have received a few posts to you on this thread over the past 10 days, which you dont appear to have received and certainly havent responded to. So I will post again. Please remember that if you ever need support, which your post to my thread indicates you do, just post here and we can respond personally to you when we can.

"Hi Mandy
Hows it all going? Im In a bad way stayed in bed today. I have no life in me and I am sick of me. It’s all too hard. Are u feeling better? I do hope so. I really feel for u. You have alot to contend with. I’m so glad u have Charli on ur side. I know what that feels like. When I become unwell 5 yrs ago I lost my government unit, my dog and my car. I moved into a SRS as I could not look after my self anymore.thats all for now.
take care x
chrissy1

Firstly, thanks for asking after me on my thread. You are an incredibly kind and thoughtful lady Chrissy and I count you as one of my support crew, someone I very much appreciate the support of. I hope you feel you can also rely on me to support you to the best of my ability when you too need to be heard and supported. Thats what the forums are all about - to give and receive much needed support and understanding.

I'm so sorry you have felt so low yesterday. Are you feeling any better today? Is there anything you can identify which has caused you to feel this bad right now? Is your daughter okay? How is your physical health right now? I hope you havent fallen victim to the cold which seems to be doing the rounds of the forums lately? I had my flu shot on Thursday, in preparation for my volunteer duties in some local nursing homes.

I really feel for you to have had your life turned upside down 5 years ago when you became so unwell. To lose your home, your car and even your beloved pet all in one go is a mighty hard thing to deal with. However if you are unable to care for yourself at home, then you know you're in the right place where you can be adequately cared for. Never ideal of course, but probably the best alternative available. I know many care facilities allow pets these days. Perhaps yours does too? Their rules may have changed since 5 years ago, so it could be worth asking. Otherwise I know some places have resident pets for the benefit of all the residents.

Talk soon.

Mandy 💜

[chrissy1]

Hello Birdy77

so nice to hear from u. I’ve lost the plot forgetting my own thread, not good hey..... I’m now catching up. How are u going ? I don’t have a lot to say but am struggling at the moment. I wrote about me on another thread (I have completely died on the inside) just realising I should have written here, where is my brain at ?? Thank u Mandy.

take care x

chrissy1

[chrissy1]

To Mandy,

thank u so much for ur thread, and all those nice words, that made me feel good. Yeah I just forgot about my thread and reading all others I got carried away. You sound a lot stronger which is great, now don’t over do it okay.

The course got cancelled (iPad) but may happen again hopefully. It would be good. There is so much to learn. We had a huge downfall yesterday,I do hope drought areas got some. I’m in Melb.

Take care❤️

chrissy1

[Guest8901]

Thats okay Chrissy. I had noticed that you were getting around to a few other threads, which is great by the way. But yeah, dont forget about your own. It should be the first you update when you are not feeling great and need to talk. But you have several threads you write on now, and I know people really appreciate having you around. I also see that your posts are now coming through in a timely manner, which makes things so much easier for all.

Sorry to hear the course got cancelled. Hopefully it will get rescheduled, because yes, there is a lot to learn with the iPads. I dont currently have one, but would like to get one some day.

Yes I saw on the news that the Southern states (Tassie and Victoria) were getting some very 'big' weather the last couple of days. We didnt get any rain where we are, northern NSW, although we had some decent rain early this week. The nights have turned cool though, which I like. And today its cool and windy as the cold front moves up from the South. It would be nice, wouldnt it, if we could just divert our excess rain from some areas, to the places who remain in drought conditions?

Let me reassure you Chrissy that there are no problems at all with you responding to the "I have completely died on the inside" thread. In fact I think its great that you are. I know it really resonated with you when you initially read it. So do keep posting there. But keep us up to date here as well, because I like to know how you're going, and I dont follow that other thread.

Cheers Chrissy.

Mandy 💜

[Ggrand]

Hello Chrissy,

Im sorry your struggling so much sweetheart,

Thanks for asking yes my cold is starting to clear up now. Just sore glands..

Its okay if you post in the threads you feel you want to and can help support...that's what the forums are for...

Are you going to see your beautiful Rachel and your gorgeous grandchildren tomorrow for Mother's Day..I really hope you do...

Is the nursing home having a special lunch tomorrow for all the mums, grandmas and possible great grandmas..

Chrissy, if ever you need to talk, I'm here for you if I can be.. Have you gone for a little walk to your local shops lately, .oh yeah I forgot to ask you the colour of your nail...Do you know what Chrissy? I just might get mine done soon..

Please, keep in touch. If you write in here. I get notified that you wrote to me.. so I can answer you...if you want to come say hello to me you can as well on my thread...

Take care, and will speak soon.

Grandy....Karen.

[chrissy1]

Hi Karen

hows it going? I was blessed and went to Rachel’s on mother’s day. We had take away which was yummy, compared to nursing home foods. My grand kids were there and had a really good time lots of laughing, which I havent done in a long time I was so lucky. Just the simple things in life.

how is ur cold? I do hope it’s going away ,you’ve had it long enough. I did my nails in a pale blue, I’m abit daring anything for a change. It lasts a month and is worth it. It makes u feel good on the inside.thats all for now

takecare💕

chrissy1

[Ggrand]

Hello Chrissy,

Wow you warmed my heart with such beautiful news about you spending time with you daughter and grandchildren that's really special, but Chrissy, what's even more special than that is you laughed..Thats Gold, that was so good to hear...

Thank you for asking..my cold has gone, but Ive been left with really sore glands, they are a bit swollen still. I made an appointment with a dr Ive not seen before to try and get them healed...

Love the colour you do your nails, I like it that your daring, and I like it that you are doing that monthly for yourself..

How are you feeling Chrissy.? I do hope your feeling better, Ive really come to care a lot about you, your so sweet and kind..

Looking forward to hearing back from you when you feel up to it..

Warm friendly hugs 🤗.

Grandy. xx

[Guest8901]

Dear Chrissy,

Its been a week since you last posted here. How has that week been for you? I noticed you visited my thread over the weekend ... thank you so much for providing support as you have. I will respond to your post there later.

It sounds like you had a lovely Mothers Day with Rachel and the grand kids. Nothing like a bit of laughter to brighten out day. I hope that has been able to sustain some cheer in your life over the past week as well. Yes its very true that the simple things in life are so often the best. That can include just sitting in the warm sunshine on a glorious autumn day, reading a good book with a hot cuppa in a nice comfy chair, or wandering in a lovely garden and smelling the roses.

Did you watch the royal wedding on Saturday night? I thought it was lovely, and really hope they have a happy life together. They appear to be well matched. Harry is one of my favourite royals in fact, so its really nice to see him looking so happy. Been a tough life for the young man. Gosh ... who'd ever choose to be a Royal?

Any further news about the postponed iPad course? Hope it happens soon.

Okay I will leave it there for now, and await your response when you find the chance.

Sending kind thoughts and a warm hug. 🤗

Mandy 💜