I just don't know anymore

[chrissy1]

I have been reading many threads, which makes me feel not so alone. I've had depression for 30 yrs. the last 5yrs have been chronic, that's why I'm in a nursing home.( no where else to go) I could not look after myself anymore. I have lost (commission unit)my unit my car and my baby dog. After many shock treatments, I am on medication which is keeping stable. I just don't have a life anymore. So alone. (Have lost my friends as I was out of action. I'm sure u guys can relate. I struggle with society that they just don't get it, what do we have to do to let them know this is REAL.( as if one could pretend with this illness) I don't think so!!! I really don't have a life

anymore. Being in a nursing home does not help cause when I leave my room I see so many older people around. It does not help my depression at all. That's all for now.thank you for ur time, looking forward to some replies.

my thread name is chrissy1 which some of you may have seen.

chrissy1

[stormcloudz]

Hi Chrissy

Thanks for your lovely post a few days ago. Yes, I'm very pleased to have you as an Internet friend, I like hearing about your days. It's so good that there is a friendly and kind place like this for us to share.

I'm a bit distracted by health issues at the moment but I am following your thread : )

[Guest8901]

Hello Chrissy,

Sorry I havent been around for some time. As you indicated in an earlier post here, I have been going through a bit lately. I do still often think of you though, just havent been getting around the forums much.

Its wonderful to read that you have been getting out and about a bit lately, such as getting to the movies to see Oceans 8. Well done.

And with the cold and/or wet weather, its also good that you have been doing indoor activities such as your puzzles. It keeps the mind active, if not the body, always very important. And its a great distraction. I used to love doing puzzles when I was younger, but I must say that its many years now since I can recall having done any. All this talk of puzzles is bringing out an urge to do one myself. I might drag one out of the cupboard and set it up on the dining table for when I need a distraction.

And something which pleases me even more than that Chrissy, is the fact that you have a new volunteer to visit you. It sounds like she is a lovely person and that you two are getting along nicely. It must be so nice to have someone to talk to and to get out and about with on occasion. It also sounds as though she is nice plus reliable, in that she let you know she couldnt make it the other day, but arranged for another day instead. Did that work out? And what did you get up to? Sometimes its nice just to have someone to listen I expect, and to contribute to an ordinary intelligent conversation. I'm glad you now appear to have that.

Well I will leave it at that for now. I really just wanted to let you know that I continue to watch over you, where I cheer on your victories and get sad over your bad days. I guess we all have those days .. unfortunately.

Keep your chin up Chrissy, I think things are getting better for you, and me too. Leaving you a bunch of lovely roses to put in your room, and to remind you that you have friends who care. 🌹

Mandy 💜

[chrissy1]

Hello Mandy

thank you for my roses, that’s so nice of u. I have been reading Karen’s and ur threads, keeping up with u both. I really do hope things getter better each day. It all takes time it’s a pain as we know, so only one day at a time, taking it easy, that’s all we can do. Being there for each other is a blessing, don’t feel so alone.

take care❤️

chrissy1

[chrissy1]

Hello stormcloudz

how are u feeling now I do hope ur travelling okay. I’m here if u want too talk. As I said it’s good to have each other. Have u been up to much, I haven’t. The new puzzel I’m trying is not so good, I think I’m going to try another one, it’s frustrating, just to hard. Hopefully going to my daughters on Saturday in the afternoon. I now struggle to go any where, it’s so hard. But I have to try. That’s all for now,

takecare❤️

chrissy1

[Ggrand]

Hello lovely Chrissy,

Im really sorry that I haven't talked to you for a while...

I know I'm late to ask this but did you end up going to your daughter the other week, and if so, gee I really hope you did..did you have a nice time?

Chrissy, please darling, can you try to at least once a week go out somewhere, it's important that you continue to go out, even if it's just outside and sit on a seat somewhere and look at everything around you...I sit on my veranda a lot and just look at nature...

How is your volunteer going,ni hope she is a nice person and you have lots to talk about, have you done your nails recently, if so is the colouvdaring/ vibrant...I knew a girl once who painted every fingernail a different colour,Nashe done that for years....then one day they were all the same colour...but after the week she was back to different colours on each fingernail again....

Chrissy,mi hope today is a good day for you.. R U Okay Chrissy?

Lots of love and care Special lady...💜🌹..

Grandy...

[Guest8901]

Hi Chrissy. Its a while since I've visited, for which I apologise.

How have you been since we last spoke? Did you commence a new puzzle, or perhaps you decided to persevere with the other one?

I hope your volunteer visitor is still visiting and that you have developed a nice friendship. Do you ever get to go our with her, perhaps for coffee or something like that?

Okay, just brief for today. But I am usually around, if you want to talk any time.

Amanda

[chrissy1]

To chrissy1

Hello Karen Mandy and stormcloudz

hope u are all travelling okay. I’m not in such a good place, it’s not good. Sorry it’s been abit. My nails are due but I’m struggling to go, may be tomorrow.

take care💕

chrissy1

[Ggrand]

Hello lovely Chrissy,

Please don't be sorry, we have all been in a place and unable to post, I was concerned because I hadn't heard from you for a while, and I have grown to care very deeply for you lovely lady...

Im really sorry honey, that your not doing good..Do you know what triggered you and brought you down....

Chrissy, please try to distract your thoughts when they start being unhealthy...I play a game called Alphabetty, it's a word game, starts out easy but your concerntration is needed, that way your mind is on the word game and not on thoughts that's dragging you down.... and there are some really good online jigsaws, colouring in. etc....

Chrissy, you have become very important to me and I care deeply for you...Please, don't hold your sadness in, you can talk here when ever you want to, we will try our best to help you accross the bridge to the other side....we all care for you very much..

Thats okay if you don't go and get your nails done...I wish I could jump through this screen and come with you. We would enjoy ourselves....I'm really sorry your struggling, my heart goes out to you....

Chrissy...please sweetie, just try to take good care of yourself, I am always here for you, listen out for you.

Ill sit with you tonight if that's okay, and I'll hold your hands and look after you tonight if that's okay...

Sending you some love, care and Huggly huggle hugs...

Love and hugs..

Grandy.....(Karen)...

[chrissy1]

To chrissy1

Hi Karen thank u for ur kind caring words. It’s monday and I tried to go and get nails done. Hopefully tomorrow. I’m at Rachel’s for tea. I didn’t get there on the weekend. I don’t want to go anywhere any more.

what have u been up too? I do hope ur ok

take care 💕

chrissy1

[Ggrand]

Hello Chrissy,

Im really sorry your struggling so much sweetheart..

It would be lovely for you to be having tea at Rachael's place, that gives you both quality together time..and I feel that's very important..

Its okay that you didn't get your nails done on a Monday..You can do then when you feel up to doing them...please be gentle on yourself...

I am the same..I don't want to go anywhere, but I do believe this is not good...I'm going to try really hard to go for a walk at least once a week to start with..Do you want to hold hands and we can walk together...whenever you go out just remember I'm with you in spirit always...Please try to get outside daily...I do sit daily outside for mindfullness....

Did you end up finishing your jigsaw puzzle?..it's okay if not...I do them online on an app, I can select, easy, medium or hard...Depending how I feel as to which level I select..

please let me know how your doing, when you feel to, I'm sitting with you today and most days..special lady...

Love and hugs...and hoping today is better then yesterday..

Grandy...