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Alone..Depressed..Sad..
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Hello Deebi👩❤️💋👩, Paws, Hanna and everyone...🤗..
I think maybe you’re both right, and I agree that it’s not a reason to speak to me or anyone the way she did...It’s hard to understand how people can be like the way they are...Are they hurting or angry or whatever else they are feeling and want others to feel the same...whatever it is/was...as soon as she saw me going down,,,,she just kept at me....she knew what she was saying was hurting me....Then the Tuesday just gone...it was like nothing had happened the week before...I don’t get it..
Today is Mrs nsc..birthday, as much as I wanted to keep avoiding her...I did pop over to her place, with a chocolate mud cake and a little gift...We had afternoon tea cake and coffee...I stayed about an hour...
Thank you for letting me know about what’s respectable to wear at bubbies, christening...I have a couple of outfits I keep in case I have to go somewhere special...They are only casual outfits but nicer then my usual casual....they will be okay....I am not one to have a lot of clothes, shoes etc...just enough to get by...It’s in the Catholic Church then a light meal at a pub....thank goodness Betty’s granddaughter has hired a room for the occasion..and we are not in the public area..
Deebi, I am sitting right next to you, while you’re typing out that email you’re going send....I know it’s going to hard for you..but in a way....it’s good to send it and know....I will be sitting by your side holding your hand...with unconditional love, care and support for you....You can do this....in your own time...💚🕊🌱🦋🐛..🧸🤗..and remember myself and your other supporters here are here for you...
My kind thoughts everyone..with lots of hugs and pats..🤗🤗🧸🧸..
👩❤️💋👩Grandy,,
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Hi Grandy,
I see you worrying about not speaking up to that woman at work.. Grandy it took me decades to learn how to speak up for myself, it's very hard to change yourself, and often speaking back at people creates more trouble. If you became someone assertive, you wouldn't be yourself any more. I like quiet gentle people!
Often if you speak back the other person just gets even worse. Don't change yourself, what you can change is how you feel about people like that woman and the way she spoke to you. Grandy its almost always about the other person - maybe they are stressed, maybe something is worrying them at home, maybe they have chronic pain, maybe they had a fight with their husband/daughter/whoever - and maybe they are just getting more cranky with age, or they like to feel important (because inside they feel inadequate). So when someone is nasty to you, can you understand it's about them not you, and try not to let it upset you - I don't answer back, I usually just either smile and or change the subject, or make an excuse to get away. That makes me feel better, it calms the other person down, and it doesn't give them any reason to keep being nasty.
Can you try to change your reaction/feelings when people are a bit rude, and realize it's because they are unhappy - and you, dear lady, are better than them, and more contented with simple things like your garden and your furkids.. and that is a nice way to be.
Big hugs.
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Hello Grandy
I'm sorry I haven't been here.
I hope the christening went well today for you... I think is is so lovely that they invited you... I feel simple gestures like that are very special as they let us know we matter to someone.
You are sweet taking a cake over to Mrs nsc for her birthday... especially after her outburst the last time you saw her. Well done staying as long as you did.
I have to thank you for asking about what to wear to the christening... it made me think it would be a good idea to get the pants & top I intended wearing to the funeral out & run them through the wash... just to freshen them as I hadn't worn them for some time... On getting the pants out it was obvious they would no longer fit.. porky pig here had put on more weight... so I tried the only clothes shop hereabouts (Target in the big town)... nothing my size... not even a dress... I've had to order online... I'm keeping everything crossed they arrive in time because if they don't... I only have a choice of jeans with my top as everything else that fits is very casual & light & summery. So a very big thank you again... if you hadn't asked I would probably have only thought to get them out a day or two before & then I would have been up the creek without a paddle.
Hugs
Paws
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Hi Grandy, did you enjoy the Christening? I hope you are going OK there. I ordered a small heat pad from EBay for little Sam, I hope with that I can wrap it in something and pop it in his bed and it won't bother him too much but it will help keep him a bit warmer.
He's so tired since the last pancreatitis attack.. poor little guy is finding it hard going to recover.
I hope you enjoyed your time at the store this week. Sending hugs your way xoxoxox
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Hello Dear Hanna, Paws, Deebi👩❤️💋👩 and everyone..🤗.
Thank you for your visits...they mean a lot to me..
The Christening was beautiful...the church service part..bubby is so precious...The reception after the church service was another thing all told....I know the baby’s mum, dad, 3 sisters and aunty...now godmother..plus of course Betty (the great grandmother) and my dear friend.,,that’s all I know...Betty being the matriarch of the family was called away a lot in conversation....Oh my goodness there was around 60 invited guests....I felt so stupid and dumb just sitting their alone most of the time and not being able to talk to the ones sitting at our table...I think I might be the dullest person ever when I go to these gatherings....I couldn’t leave because I drove Betty...Never ever again...
Work has been okay...not great but okay...Monday Betty and I enjoy ourselves at work....sharing the work....Tuesday’s co-ordinator...sits on her behind all day near the till and calls out all day for me to do this and get that, find this size...really over her...it’s all on the security cameras which are relayed to the bigger store in the next town...but her being a great friend of this boss...which is our store manager gets away with it...at least I am kept busy...I suppose...
Paws, I am pleased in a round about way I help you to remember about your clothes...again lovely lady..so very sorry about your elderly relative, my heart goes out to you and our dear friend Deebi💚🤗...It’s so sad when loved ones leaves this part of their journey...😢..
Hanna...I wish I could...words, yelling, swearing, name calling...it’s really very hurtful to me...One would think after many years of being spoken to like that, it would have harden or numb me or my emotions...but it doesn’t...it’s something I can’t get used to...I think I’m mentally damaged forever... in the way I’ll always be the gopher or scapegoat for others..
Sending my love to you all...with hugs and care💜🤗🦋..
Hey bbff...I’ll pop in tonight to see you...if that’s okay?...deep sss love with my kind and caring 💭...24/7.
👩❤️💋👩Grandy..👼🦄..
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Hi Grandy (and everyone)
I just happened to be here I think not too long after you posted. The Christening sounds lovely, and don't worry about the big lunch group afterwards - I'm like that in a big group too - we quiet people aren't usually good in big groups - I'd be much the same as you - and I know what it's like when you have to stay because you've driven someone else, long ago I decided never to offer to take someone if I could help it for the same reason!!!
You made me chuckle, that bossy woman at your place sounds just like the op shop here - there is a super bossy nasty woman and a nice little elderly lady I like to chat to, and whenever we try to chat the bossy woman intervenes and frightens the nice elderly lady away - I feel sorry for the nice lady!!!!! What is it about op shop supervisors I wonder? - maybe they're all distant relatives!!!!! (grin)
Sounds like that woman was nasty to you, but if she is like that she is not a happy person, and you are much better off than her really. If people are happy they aren't nasty to other people.
I have noticed with the ladies at the dog park here that if I chat to one of the men who turn up (there are two or three fellows who sometimes turn up), I've spotted the women casting glances at each other. I am so over this, presumably they are making assumptions... it's ridiculous! I just keep on talking.. it's quite amusing to annoy the other women sometimes!
Poor little Sam had to go back to the vet today with an infected eye - so he got antibiotics and a cream I have to apply somehow - he's really been in the wars lately. The cost was another couple of hundred dollars!!!! eeeek.
Big hugs oxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo
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Grandy, another thought - you're not a scapegoat, but it's very hard to change ourselves and we can't change the background that has formed us... you could try saying to that woman, Please don't speak to me like that - but she will not be used to you standing up for yourself, and she might shut up, or she could have even more of a go at you as she will be taken by surprise and might attack back.
Personally I have always liked and preferred quiet kind gentle people, both with women friends and guys. There is a lot to be said for kind people, and if it's not in your nature to be very assertive, so be it. My best friends have always been this type of person, I don't like people who are aggressive or cranky or unpleasant in any way.
It's perhaps harder for us to understand how much the world needs more gentle, kind, caring people - it has plenty of outspoken/angry/nasty people, especially right now in these times.
Gentle, kind, unassertive but good to animals, old people, children... gee that's a human being the world needs!
A young woman vet was rude to me this morning - I often don't fully realize the rudeness until later, I think that is some hangover from my childhood with a mother with I now realize, a severe mh issue. Yes, she got away with it - but next week I change little Sam's arthritis injection appointment to another, nicer, young woman vet there. I speak with my feet, as it were. No doubt the young woman vet saw me as older, quiet, and an easy target - and who knows how stressed she is privately in her own life. The main thing is she treated Sam. There is really no need for me to bother about her.. but I will quietly see another vet next time.
I hope you feel better about yourself soon, and realise what a valuable person and friend you are. Big hugs.
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Hello Hanna, Waves Deebi👩❤️💋👩, Paws and all....🤗.
Hanna thank you so much for your thoughts, I really do appreciate them...and am thinking on your words...
Not sure why she has changed so much since she returned from a few months off....she was really nice..
Will be back later today or tomorrow...Just wanted to pop in and thank you so much for your time and caring very caring supportive posts...
Kind thoughts everyone with my love, hugs and care..l💜🤗🦋.
👩❤️💋👩Grandy..
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Hi Grandy,
Do you mean she was nice before she went away for a few months, and then has turned unpleasant towards you?
You have done so well with your work there, using the till and serving customers and getting along well with the other ladies.. is she jealous that you are doing so well? Do you think this is possible? Women are so threatened by other women... I could be completely wrong but just a thought?
oxoxoxoxox
