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Lost my big bro nearly a month ago

Community Member
He was nearly my twin, we were basically the same person but I'm a girl. I feel the main reason he struggled so much was because of societal expectations on males. I miss him so much. I love him. Now I'll never see him or his goofy smile again. His silly dumb jokes. His sweet, sincere personality. He was hard to deal with at times because of his struggles but he was truly one of the best people I have ever known. He would never want to harm anyone.
5 Replies 5

Champion Alumni
Champion Alumni

Dear Amaya,

I'm so sorry to read of the death of your brother, it sounds like you were really close despite his struggles.

I don't know the words to write that may help you in any way. I just wanted to let you know someone has read your words, I acknowledge your hurt, pain and loss.

No doubt you have many mixed emotions and thoughts happening.

Some people find it helpful to write their loved one a letter, you may want to keep it, put it somewhere that reminds you of him, read it out loud or rip it up. Others find it helpful to light a candle in remembrance.

Thinking of you and sending you condolences.

Kind regards from Dools

Champion Alumni
Champion Alumni

Hi Amaya

Your post really touched my heart as I too lost my brother, just last year, he was 19 years old, well young.

Grief is such a journey and one we will ultimately be on for the rest of our lives, the pain does change and the way we cope does improve but we will always have that one little spot that always aches.

You will always have the memories and the wonderful times that you shared, you will always be his sister and you will always have pictures and things that make you smile when you think of him. Rely on these to pull you through the hard times. Also know that it is ok to feel, to feel sad, to feel angry and to feel like you have been ripped off. Cry and let the tears out and let the pain flow out too, then try to have something to bring you back and to help you to move forward.

There is no time frame to this and do not let anyone tell you otherwise, you take the time you need to do the healing that you need to do. Reach out though when you do need a hand to help you through a particularly hard time and also let those around you know how they can help you as they will want to support you too.

I am so sorry for your loss Amaya, you are with people who will sit and share and talk here and give you a virtual hug as you move through your journey of grief.

Sending you strength.


Valued Contributor
Valued Contributor

Hi Amaya,

I am so sorry to hear about your brother's death. It sounds like you were very close. Grief can be so painful, look after yourself - be kind to yourself and give yourself the time and space that you need to grieve and process what has happened. Take care Amaya & please feel free to reach out again.

Champion Alumni
Champion Alumni

Hi Amaya,

I'm so so sorry for your loss.

It sounds like you'll have memories to treasure forever! Hold those those memories tight and be assured that you'll meet again for another journey. Until then keep letting him look over your journey of life ahead.

Please let us know how you're holding up.



Community Member

My brother just died a little over 2 weeks ago. Your post is lovely.

My brother also had his struggles, they made it very difficult.

Under all those struggles though, we always knew we loved each other.

Thank you for your post.