Work

[Iloveunicorns28]

I have worked really hard for my job, and I have always enjoyed it up until now. As a requirement of my job, I have had to relocate from the metropolitan area in which I grew up to a small rural town. As a result, I had to leave my position at the time, and move out of my family home for the first time to live by myself. It was incredibly hard establishing myself at my new work place with no support network around me and nobody to debrief to once I got home from work. I felt absolutely miserable. I was crying almost every single day and constantly feeling regret. It got to the point where I took a week off ‘sick’ because I just could not get out of bed. I was diagnosed with severe depression and moderate anxiety and started seeing a psychologist. I told him I wanted to stay in my job because I did not want to feel like a failure and disappoint people. He gave me some strategies to help me cope and they helped me get through the rest of the year. After being back at home with my family for Christmas and New Years, I am beginning to panic about going back to the place that made me so miserable. I just don’t know what to do. Either I keep working and suffering in silence or I quit my job.

[blondguy]

Hello Iloveunicorns28

Welcome and good on you for having the courage to post too!

What you have been through would be a major stressful incident to most people even if they didnt have anxiety/depression. Relocating ourselves is high up the scale of major life stresses. I have had anxiety/depression for a few years now and am lucky as I didnt have to relocate as with my levels of anxiety I would have had to have found a different job

You are not a failure in any way. Living with depression/anxiety is similar to a physiological health issue. If you wish to continue in your current position it may reboot some anxiety with the thought of going back.

Your health is paramount..disappointing anyone or feeling like you are failure is common but it also means that your health is not being placed first.

I have been in corporate for decades and if I ended up in a postion that made me miserable I wouldnt be able to sustain doing so. I have had to take a salary cut a couple of times so my health would improve.

You may even find your depression/anxiety levels reduce if you considered a change in your work environment

Having depression can be like trying to run when using our invisible crutches. Its very hard to accomplish

You are not alone with this situation. There are also many gentle people on the forums that can be here for you too 😉

I hope you can find some peace with this current situation Iloveunicorns28. I hope you can let us know how you are going

My Kind thoughts for you

Paul

[Quercus]

Hi Iloveunicorns28 and welcome,

Being isolated and homesick is horrible. I know this feeling so well. I moved to the city from a rural town for uni and have stayed because of my relationship. But the pull of family is immense.

With depression on the scene it feels even worse because you need a support network.

I'm glad to hear you have reached out for medical support. But what are you doing to improve your supports?

Things that helped me were:

• Make a set time once a week to call home (skype is even better). I found if the contact was regular I spent less time "catching up on the news" and more time having a proper conversation.
• Find hobbies or classes locally. You don't exist just to work. It can feel hard to make that first step but it is worth it. What do you enjoy? Sport. Cooking. Dance. Swimming. Bushwalking. Whatever you're into there will be something locally. Join in anything.
• What about volunteering? Great way to become part of a rural community.
• Speaking up at your work. Have you told anyone that you're struggling with feeling isolated? People can't read your mind even of you think it is obvious they may have no idea.
• Check out your local environment. Bush walking. Sight seeing. Take a camera. It doesn't matter if you are alone. Just get out and explore. Gives you a topic to talk to others about at work. What should I go see? Who knows someone might ask to join you.

There are so many way to slowly start to build a network. You've already begun. Writing on here is great too. There is always someone online so you're not alone and we are all in the same boat mentally so we do understand.

Please keep on trying and taking good care of yourself.

Nat