I feel like one of these shells I see on the beach every day

[Guest_3712]

Heyall                                                                                                                                                                                                    I am at one with the ocean 

I am cancer the crab 

I watch the waves crash onto the sand, leaving in it's wake smashed and broken shells As the waves recede back into the depths, some shells also return, intact, to the depths to surface again,and again or if the tide is especially strong go further out to sea, but will invariably return as the pull is too strong. 

Most of Those left on the sand will crumble under the feet of people  unaware of their  turmoil - just another shell on the beach. nothing special , no point stopping.  Then maybe just maybe, someone sees something. a tiny flash of colour, an unusual shape and they stop. they look. they see .

 Then they reach down and pick it up turning it over slowly in their hands. They see the beauty that was and carefully putting in their pocket think, "I'm going to see if I can clean this up, and return it to it's original beauty".

I feel like one of these shells I see on the beach every day. My hope is someone will pick me up and restore me to my authentic self  

Not this 'shell' of what I should be, could be, need to be. I am so overwhelmed

Stressless

[Neil_1]

Hi Stressless  

 That’s one intriguing post you’ve delivered.   Feeling continually bombarded with the crash of waves, as well as the pull of the tide back out and then back in again. 

That’s an amazingly similar analogy that I’ve used in my manuscript of my life and how I referred to depression at one time.  I am the beach and the ocean is the depression and so it batters away all the time, then sometimes it’ll recede a bit, but it always comes back and sometimes encroaches even further into me (further up the beach).  Always there – just a constant happening.  

Ess Elle, I’m really sorry to hear that things are going so badly for you at the moment – and it seems that this moment has stretched on for quite a while now.  

 You’ve kind of gazumped me a little of late – as I read your posts and I so want to add something useful to say back to you, but I come up with a bunch of tripe as I struggle to find the right words to say back to you.  

 I guess all I’m doing is to say, “I’m hearing you and I wish there was something better I could say”.  I also hope that you can find a guiding light soon that will help you out of this darkness.  

Kind regards  

Neil

[White_Rose]

My Dear Stressless

What a poignant post. It almost made me cry.  I can see someone tenderly picking you up and wiping away all the dirt and sand, gently washing and polishing you and cradling you in their hands.  It's a wish for all of us.  Thank you for the image.

Like Neil I am a little lost for words.  Doesn't happen very often.  Can I say, don't be alone on your beach or just with other injured creatures.  Find some whole persons to join you in your journey and draw strength from all of them.

Warm wishes

White Rose

[Guest_3712]

Hi  Neil,

it's ok I don't expect you to solve my problems

I;m beginning to think there is no solution.

it seems every door I open has been concealing some other misery.

Ess Elle

[Guest_3712]

Hi White Rose,

I love the beach. Always have.

it's my sanctuary , my haven .

it's real. What you see is what you get

Ess Elle

[geoff]

dear Ess Elle, the ocean, the sea, what does it do, well it changes the tide, it comes in and washes the sand, but it also dumps it's debris on the sand, but at the moment you are caught in a rip, the ocean around you still flows, but you can't get out from this rip, so what do you have to do, because trying to swim against it won't do anything except exhaust you, so you have to relax, float to the top and let the tide then take you in shore.

A simple analogy, but straight to the point, but exactly how you feel, but one thing to remember is when you are taken back in then this a time to sit on the beach and ponder that it will never happen again.

Easier said than done, but let's take one of your problems and call it riplom ( ripproblem), so you are stuck in this riplom and can never seem to get out from it, but once the ocean let's you go and takes you in, you then know that you can never beat this riplom, it's impossible to do, because you will never be that strong to do so, so push it away, and always be careful of where you swim next time.

Again a funny analogy but exactly how you feel. L Geoff. x

[Guest_3712]

Hi Geoff,

yes it is exactly how I feel. stuck in a rip and yes it is exhausting

thanks

be kind to yourself

Ess Elle

[Mares73]

Hi EssElle I'm sorry how you are feeling. I'm feeling kinda caught in a rip myself. Do you know your triggers? Can you identify what your feelings are? Maybe getting them out will help? Gee I'm no expert, just a friend who cares deeply. Love Mary

[Guest_3712]

Hi Mares,

I have been following your posts and say more power to you my friend.

Yes I know my triggers and no surprise most are the same as yours and Jo's and GA as well.

I just don't seem to be able to get a grip.

take care of yourself . you are doing an amazing thing and I am truly sorry I can't be there to hold your hand in person

Be kind to yourself

Stressless