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Escaping into sleep
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I am heartily sick of wasting my days - I have a lot of stuff I have to do, but the temptation to escape it all is overwhelming.
On days I do have to work I find getting out of bed so very difficult, it's the hardest thing I do all day. I try to get to bed at 9.30-10.00pm to make it easier to get up but I think I just hate being awake and conscious.
Does anyone have any tips on how to make engaging with life not seem so awful?
I was doing okay for quite a few months, but now seem to be back in the black hole.
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But to try and break the cycle that it puts us in is to do just small things to begin with, nothing that will exhaust us to the point that we never want to do it again, we don't have to do it everyday, but it can be done on the spur of the moment, and that's the best time, because if you have your week planned as to what to do, then you may decide at the time that you couldn't care about doing it.
If you have dogs take them for a walk around the block, throw the ball and see the excitement that the dog has in their eyes, waiting for you to throw it.
It's only something small to do, and we all know that sleeping is certainly what we really want to do, but try and break this habit that engulfs your day.
It won't be easy to begin with, but when you are in bed your mind will be racing around and thinking about everything, then try and think about throwing the ball, if you don't have dogs then go down to the park and watch those youngters praticing their football training, but you have to break that cycle.
Please come back to us and let us know how you're going. Geoff.
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Hi Geoff, it's so simple but from my vantage point I couldn't see it - taking my dog to the park is a great idea. I always think about the mountains of housework and decluttering I have to do, but maybe if I did something pleasant just for a while it would make being awake more bearable.
I have a cat and a dog, the dog is very old and arthritic and can't go for walks as such, but I could drive her down to the park to have a bit of a sniff and an amble in the sunshine. It would do us both good.
I felt a bit better today, yesterday was really awful but this morning I felt like I had turned a corner of sorts. It may be a bit of a climb out of the pit but at least I've stopped going downwards and am about to start going up.
I take quite a bit of medication, but it is still a daily struggle to keep the depression at bay. Some days are easier than others and for the last few weeks I've really taken a nosedive. Previously to that I was doing really well. I guess it's all part of the journey.
Thanks for your help
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Well I surprised myself this morning. I didn't have to go to work yet I got up at a decent hour and took the dog to the park. Normally I would be put off by the massive effort of putting clothes on and finding my joggers and such, but this morning I just did it in an unthinking daze - if I thought about how much effort it would be I probably wouldn't do it.
I managed to get up at a decent hour yesterday too for the first time in weeks. I thought it might be a fluke, but was able to do it again today. I think maybe a factor is I have been doing a self-hypnosis CD to help me get up when the alarm goes off and it may have begun to kick in. I have been doing the CD for a while with no results and feeling discouraged but maybe now it is taking effect. Or maybe I'm just naturally beginning to feel better.
Has anyone else tried self-hypnosis for anything?
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Haven't tried self-hypnosis but I do know how you feel when it comes to escaping into sleep. I did it last night, and I'll no doubt do it again tonight...and tomorrow...and the day after that.
I have no way out it seems 😞
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Hello Downandout, have you thought about trying some of the things that Anahata has tried? The first step is often the hardest, but if you're trying to fight the urge to go back to bed, you can try taking it an hour at a time.
Start by making a deal with yourself to put off going to bed for an hour, and involve yourself in doing something else physically engaging - it could be anything, from sorting clothes, vacuuming, or going for a walk around the block. You may be pleasantly surprised that once the hour is up, you don't feel like going to bed anymore. Small steps.
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Hi Anahata. Everything you're saying about the 'joy's of sleeping' I can well relate to. I feel sleep is a way of escaping the illness too. When depression seems to completely overwhelm us, sleeping is a wonderful way of switching off from having to make decisions that are too hard. I used to belong to a ladies group. I suffered such debilitating depression from being alone, I would take my hubby to work, go back home and go straight to bed. Just the thought of getting out of bed can be terrifying. I think if you can set yourself one chore a day, it doesn't matter how long it takes to complete, but once you complete it, that gives you the motivation to try again. Do this for a week or so, then next time, try two chores a day and so on, till you start to feel that 'hey I can do this'. If you digress, it doesn't matter, don't feel guilty because you lost the motivation, the fact that you tried is the important bit to remember. Even going for a walk can be a chore, but it is possible. Maybe just walking around the garden for a start. Keep a record for your own interests. If you manage your two chores, or your walk around the garden, give yourself the 'thumbs up'. If you don't, don't worry, tell yourself there's always next time. No-one's perfect. Everyone of us has been where you are.
Keep up with your meditation group.
Lynda.
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