Bipolar diagnosis. No one believes me

Sammy_ · ‎18-08-2017

Hi everyone,

so for the past year or more I haven't been myself... went to the doctor and got a referral for the psychologist and his diagnosis (and the doctors) is bipolar.

I am booked in for a psychiatrist appointment for a second opinion and am waiting on that....

the problem is I told my partner and he just said to me - great... another problem we don't need. We can't catch a break. He told me he doesn't believe any of the people I have seen and I don't think he will believe anyone.

i don't know what to do. I have no support and I am all alone. Since I found out I was kind of realived... I was happy to know that it was okay for my mind to be this way and there are ways of managing it but he thinks I am fine.

I hide behind a facade that takes all my might until I snap... it takes all my energy and I am just so exhausted.

I am a mother I do everything for everyone else... but I guess this is just an inconvenience

MsPurple · ‎18-08-2017

Hi Sammy_ and welcome to the forums

I'm sorry your partner had that reaction. I'm guessing it didn't make you feel too good. No one wants to deal with mental illness. Especially the sufferer. But unfortunately we have to use the cards we have been dealt. I am guessing he didn't know what to say and this is why he had this reaction. It does take time to accept mental illness. Especially for loved ones. They feel like they are partially to blame, but you need to reausre them it is nothing they have done, it is caused by a factor of things including genetics, environment etc. It can affect anyone at any age.

I myself have GAD but I know what it is like to live with someone with bipolar. My mum was diagnosed in her mid 30s. She was told earlier that they thought she had bipolar but she didn't want to believe it. It was a few years later that she was sent to a specialist that she finally accepted it. She thought it was a life sentance to mental illness at first. Then she was relieved because she finally understood what had been happening to her all these years.

I know you and your partner maybe concerned by the idea of bipolar but I want to reassure you it is just as treatable as depression and anxiety disorder, if you follow dr and therapists guidance. My mum has been well ever since the diagnosis. Yes she has had some ups and downs but she has always listened to her dr and this has kept her well. She is able to work and function fully (with the occasional day off required). I just want you to know that you will be ok with this. It will take time but it will be ok. It is better knowing now and getting an understanding of the condition so you can understand what is happening to you and to get the appropriate help.

I want to suggest to you to go to this other BB forum page. If the link below doesn't work go to the long term support threads and go to This bipolar life. It is a really good forum for those with bipolar disorder who have questions or just want to vent

https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/online-forums/long-term-support-over-the-journey/this-bipolar-life/page/35#qnTAJ3HzvGGEbv8AAOnT_A

I hope some of this advice helps. If you have any questions you want to ask feel free to do so here or anywhere on the forums. We are here to support each other

MP

Debzo · ‎19-08-2017

Hi Sammy

I'm new here and a bit nervous about posting but here goes. I too was diagnosed with bipolar disorder and that was about 20 years ago. They called it slow cycling because it only flared up to unmanageable proportions every couple of years. I would have a couple of years of living with lows (which I managed quite successfully), then it would all get too much and I would have a massive high which I couldn't manage. I'm sharing this because there are lots of forms of bi-polar disorder and the more you educate yourself about it the better (knowledge is power).

I was in these two-year cycles for about ten years, always working on myself and making them less acute. You can live a very normal life with bipolar disorder if you manage it properly but I don't believe that you can put it anyone else's hands. Therapists, doctors, medications etc are all necessary and useful but because each case is so unique you need to take responsibility for yourself.

Bi-polar is not a lifelong disability for everyone diagnosed and not everyone has to be on medication for ever. I stress here that I can only speak for myself, everyone is different. For me it was an indication that my life was out of order and bi-polar was my way of coping with that. Of course no one ever put it like that, if they had it might have saved me years of work. I am now a very happy person, on no medication and I do not identify myself as having bi-polar disorder anymore. My Bi-polar was my response to a situation that I couldn't seem to handle any other way. I don't believe I will ever have bi-polar again because I have learned how to deal with the issues that caused it. To me your last sentence is a very good place to start " I am a mother I do everything for everyone else... but I guess this is just an inconvenience" Start by nurturing yourself, even just a little. It's never fair or healthy for anyone to do everything for everyone else and we shouldn't expect other's to respect and nurture us if we won't do it for ourselves.

I hope that helps 🙂

Debzo