Worst Joke Wednesday

[Neil_1]

Hi all

I know a while back there was a thread with some jokes on it - just to try and lighten the load for folk and to provide a few jolly japes and spiffy spifferoons (those words etched in my memory bank from the late and great Kenny Everitt).  However, I was far to lazy to try and find the other thread, so thought I'd start up a new one WJW.

Here we go people, something to start you off with:

"When I was a small boy, I had a dog named Tax.  I'd open the door and "Income Tax""

"That very same year, I had a bird called Enza.  I'd open the window and "Influenza"

Now, they can't be done on any other day - for it is after all, Worst Joke Wednesday.

See if you can beat either of those?

[GuyIncognito]

A man walks into a bar with a piece of tarmac under his arm.

He says "I'll have two beers thanks. One for me and one for the road"

I'll show myself out.

[Lost_Girl]

Ha! I really like that one. Nice work GuyIncognito.

[GuyIncognito]

You are too kind 🙂

[Gruffudd]

Hey Europe, you look great.

Have you lost a few pounds?

[Gruffudd]

I guess Europe now has 1GB of free space.

[Lost_Girl]

I know it's not Wednesday.... hoping you're ok Gruffud....here's one for you....

How do the Welsh eat cheese?

Caerphilly.

[Gruffudd]

There you are, calling me back with my home town, the big cheese...

[Moonstruck]

I really like whiteboards don't you?

I think they're remarkable.

[Unbeliever]

A man calls his doctors office and tells his doctor that the anti-depression medication he perscribed several months earlier isn't working.

The doctor asks him "have you been following the perscription instructions"?

The man realising that he never actually looked at the intructions picks up the pill bottle and it reads...

"Take twice a day within half an hour of a meal"

And

"Is most effective when taken on a caribbean island, sitting in a hammock with margaritas".

[Gruffudd]

Why did the cowboy die with his boots on?

Because he didn’t want to stub his toe when he kicked the bucket!