What to do next

seanwild · ‎06-09-2022

Hi this is my first time posting. Im 58 and have had GAD all my life, been taking medication continuously for just short of 20 years and off and on since I was a late teen. Ive seen psychologists and am currently seeing a psychiatrist. I have learnt cognative techniques such as ACT, breathing, safe place imagery where I use affirmations and relaxation to feel better about myself. I recently went a new psychologist to understand if there any other techniques that I could learn as I was feeling overwhelmed and going into a slump for the third time in 3 years, his advice was that my anxiety trick bag was full and made the correct comment that I was worn out and close to not being able to work. I have changed medication type twice and increased the doseage 3 times for each, each time makes feel rock bottom and disoreientated for 3-4 weeks before I come good and this time I wanted to see if I could turn the corner without changing medication - Im up to week 4. What annoys me the most is I am unable to tell when I am about to fall into a slump and that's when the intrusive thoughts start, it is so debilitating as it impacts my ability to think clearly and concentrate at work, my memory of things said and written becomes poor and I have no energy other than to force myself to work. I do not get panic attacks, I feel sorry for those that do but I sometimes wish that was the type of anxiety I suffered from, if taking a tablet dissapated the feeling and I was able to be myself as soon as the medication took effect (bet it is not that easy) I want to claw back to feeling OK about myself and my loved ones. I walk regularly, have stopped drinking alcahol and coffee, backed off on the sugar, eat well but not as regular as ideal, in my head I beleive the answer is learning to continually practise relaxation during the day to keep the stress levels to a level that will not unbalance my chemical make up. Yoga is not going to make the difference.

Any suggestions?

Sophie_M · ‎06-09-2022

Hi seanwild,

Welcome to our forum. We're so glad to have you here, and we want to thank you for such an important post, as a lot of people will relate to what you're sharing.

We hear that you've tried a lot of treatments and have had quite the journey. It's really important to acknowldege you, how far you've come and how much you've put in to your mental health trying to get it right. Getting to where you are, feeling like you have, is no mean feat. It can be so disheartening when you try so hard and still find yourself in a place of not feeling like you've got the answers still.

We know that you will find support and connection here in this forum, even if nothing else. You are now part of the family and we hope you will share and contribute to your hearts content.

Please don't hesitate to call us for brief counselling support at any time (24/7) if you wish on 1300 22 4636, or you might prefer online chat (as it's texting rather than talking).

Looking forward to what our beautiful community have to share with you.

Kind regards, Sophie M

Petal22 · ‎06-09-2022

Hi seanwild,

Thank you for your first post 😊

Im sorry you have been enduring this and for so long I understand it would be difficult.

You may feel worn out because anxiety can make us feel that way but there is always hope that you will find something new that will help you.

I understand how debilitating intrusive thoughts can be, they really have the power to rev our anxiety up to severe levels ( if we give them our attention)…

I understand this well because I was diagnosed with severe anxiety OCD this condition was the most exhausting debilitating condition I have ever been through.

I was stuck in a vicious OCD cycle…. I would have intrusive thoughts and then I’d give this thought my full attention I’d question it, analyse it….
I would also perform compulsions some mentally and some physically.

I felt as though I was living in my worst nightmare.

I learned to take away OCD s power ……. My attention.

I did a certain therapy that intervened with my condition it gave me all of the skills and tools I needed to manage and then master my condition.

Ive been recovered for many years now one of the reasons I recovered was I learned what my vicious OCD cycle was and I learned that when I was reaching a certain stage of the cycle how to recognise this and then how to disengage from it before I got any further into it.

Can I ask if you ever feel like you are in a cycle inside your mind?

I believe you can learn more tricks…

Please ask me any thing.

therising · ‎10-09-2022

Hi seanwild

You sound so exhausted, desperate for a new direction. I feel for you so much, having faced GAD for so very long.

I've been led to believe we can feel general anxiety from a few different angles. Hope the following few examples help when it comes to making some difference:

Mentally, the body's reaction to thought processes is what most are familiar with. You have a thought, whether in relation to a memory, managing a current event or whether it's coming from your imagination and the body will respond to the thought. As the brain and body discuss the need to fight or take flight, you'll feel the discussion
Physically, while there can be that discussion between the brain and nervous system going on, I can recall some years ago my anxiety being exclusively a physical thing. When I used to get silent migranes (my brain doing some weird glitchy thing), I could tell when the glitches were impacting the part of my brain that related to my nervous system. I'd be quite happy, with no fear whatsoever, yet having what felt like an anxiety attack
Naturally, we're designed to feel. What we're feeling, how we're feeling it and how to turn the volume up or down on feeling can be just a few of the challenges regarding what comes naturally. A HSP (highly sensitive person) is an amazing person. They have the ability to feel just about anything. Yes, it can feel like a curse at times. They can feel when there's not enough time to complete a task (feel the volume of work and the lack of time), feel when other people are stressing even when it's not at all obvious, feel when it's time to rise to courage in a fearful situation, feel fear for others (through compassion), feel their own tolerance levels in a challenge, feel the volume/vast collection of sound in a shopping centre etc etc. Basically, every emotion (energy in motion) begins with a charge that be felt. So, you can be feeling 5 very different charges in one day and they can all feel like anxiety, unless you can master picking them apart

Wondering whether you're someone who can feel sound.

seanwild · ‎17-09-2022

Hi Petal22

the cycle or feeeling that I am losing control of my minds comes in two forms for me, during the day intrusive thoughts when I am on my own and even when in conversation and in the early hours of the morning when I can lie in bed for hours, the thoughts are rapid at the begginning and at the end dissipate but at the same time my mood is lower and lower - I would describe this as being in a rut

When I am feeling Ok I am not good at being self aware of my anxiety, denial really, and then I start to get anxious feelings and thoughts and then I strat to worry and then next thing I am in a rut

Any tips on being more self aware and remedy at that time to avoid the rut would be well received

thx for listening

Petal22 · ‎17-09-2022

Hi seanwild,

Thank you for your reply.

When your intrusive thoughts start and you notice them you could then immediately try to disengage by turning your attention onto something else in the present moment.

You could choose mindfulness or attention training.

eg you have the thought instead of giving this thought your attention turn your attention away from it and instead choose to feel your feet on the ground….. how do they feel? If your mind wonders back to the thoughts re direct it again. And repeat

Try not to follow the thought

I understand in conversation our intrusive thoughts can arise ( this also happens to me and sometimes they are about the person I am talking to)…..

When this happens to me I try to really put my attention on what the person is saying instead of the thought……… by doing this the thought will evaporate because I haven’t given it my attention.

My intrusive thoughts where more rapid while I was experiencing severe anxiety.

How do you react to your intrusive thoughts?

In the therapy I did, I learned to react to my intrusive thoughts in a more helpful way so they didn’t effect my mood as much.

My intrusive thoughts really did affect my mood because I would dwell on them and get really down because of the way these thoughts made me feel.

In a way we need to learn to be in front of the cycle so I have ingrained being in the present moment as much as I can ( it takes practice) and I try to live in a state of mindfulness and choose my reactions so my thoughts can’t bring me down or raise my anxiety.

Once you can notice certain ques from your body you can learn to bring yourself back to a state of calm before anything escalates.

Another thing I’ve found helpful is if I have an intrusive thought I can then redirect my attention onto my breath if my mind wonders I can it back to my breath.

Please ask me anything else and if you need me to clarify anything please let me know.

Petal22 · ‎17-09-2022

Just another thing seanwild as soon as you notice anxious thoughts and feelings this is the exact moment you need to disengage and practice mindfulness.

This is the time to redirect your attention.

Once you can master this skill you won’t go to the next stage of worrying you have already stopped the cycle at noticing the thoughts and feelings.

It takes practice and perseverance but it’s very attainable.

seanwild · ‎18-09-2022

thx Petal22

i had a tough day so your advice is well received

Petal22 · ‎18-09-2022

That’s ok seanwild 😊

Some days really are harder than others but the more you practice the easier it will become.

I learned in therapy that some days are harder than others, OCD (in my case) works on a sliding scale but eventually the good days will outweigh the bad ones.

If you have a bad day just remind yourself that a good one is coming.

I like to meditate with leaves on a stream….. you could google it if you like.

It helps with intrusive thoughts.

Learning to watch the leaves float down the stream…. ( just like thoughts and our minds).

It takes practice and we all have harder days than others… your not alone