I'm 28 years old, and I mainly first had anxiety as a teenager when I
used to worry about neurological conditions like MS etc. For some
condition worries I went to the doctor, some I didn't. A psychiatrist at
the time told me I had health anxiety. Fa...
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I'm 28 years old, and I mainly first had anxiety as a teenager when I
used to worry about neurological conditions like MS etc. For some
condition worries I went to the doctor, some I didn't. A psychiatrist at
the time told me I had health anxiety. Fast forward to today, I had
recently been avoiding a knee injury, and this lead me to thinking "What
if I've been avoiding the MS worry, I never got an MRI...". So I
spiralled into anxiety about MS, as I've always had shaky hands,
twitches etc. I went to my GP and he didn't suspect anything but
referred me to an MRI anyway. When the results came back, there was no
sign of MS and the sort but it said "mild enlargement of ventricle, but
in proportion to the subarachnoid space". My GP thought it could be
damage from something. The ventricles enlarge with old age and dementia
where the surrounding tissue atrophies and the ventricles expand. He
said it's probably nothing major but referred me to a neurologist. The
neurologist did some basic tests, measured my head circumference, looked
at the MRI and report and said everything looks fine. He said my head
circumference is above average so it's proportionate and the ventricle
didn't look big to him anyway, he said the report has been
"over-reported". He said "even if it's big it's almost certainly always
been that way". So that seemed fine, but I remembered that a few years
back I had a crazy party phase and did alot of ecstasy pills and went to
raves and the like quite a bit. At the time my friend told me I was
being forgetful of things like where I put my lighter etc, and he
thought the ecstasy would be to blame. When I reduced it at the time,
those symptoms went away, even though I did some pills every now and
then until I grew out of it. I told my GP about the ecstasy, but not
about the forgetfullness it seemed to cause at the time. He didn't think
it would be related. I'm mainly worried because I didn't tell the
neurologist about the ecstasy phase. I did tell both doctors though that
I've been going to boxing training the past year or so. This is another
side anxiety, in fact getting concussed the other day triggered these
worries. I don't spar(practice box) that much though and don't usually
go hard, but did get a few mild concussions. I've decided to stop it
now. I am overhwhelmed with quite a bit of anxiety right now. Thankfully
I made a psychologist's appointment next week for another reason
earlier. But at the moment I feel crippled with anxiety I've been
painfully googling, and did see that ecstasy can cause memory issues
temporarily, the physical damage didn't include my case of enlargement,
but had some other possbilities of physical damage, and I don't even
know in what category of a user I would be classed into. I'm going back
to uni soon, and I've felt I've been coming back to my original academic
self that's been on pause for quite some time, and I'm in extreme fear
that along the way I've damaged my only original talent, which was that
I was book smart in school. My mum also sent the report to a specialist,
and he said that's not a concern, although he only read the report and
didn't see the MRI. The issue is I can't mention that ecstasy bit and
had to come online to talk about it, and I went to forums for anxiety
help in my teenage years when I had health anxiety. On other words, I
was at the time "binging" ecstasy every week and sometimes more, so my
usage was quite high. I apologise for the walls of text, I'm just
feeling crippled and don't know how I'll even make it a week before the
psychologist appointment, which I made due to some other unrelated
anxieties and issues. Even having anxiety is giving my anxiety that it
might be due to a brain issue.
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