Anxiety about doing the wrong thing

Louise24 · ‎05-09-2017

Hi all,

I am new to this blog but have been reading through it and have an immediate sense of relief knowing that others who suffer from severe anxiety like myself have been getting the right help and have/are finding ways to cope.

I seem to have panic attacks when I think I have done the wrong thing and I can't relax until I know that what I did isn't an issue or that it won't hurt anyone or hurt me.

sometimes there is no way of knowing or finding out if I have done the right or wrong thing and so I overthink it for days on end until something else comes up that makes me anxious and so I forget about my other worries.

I have been unable to work due to this and have started taking medication and getting professional help, but does anyone else suffer from this?

Does anyone have any advice on how to manage this?

much appreciated, thanks!

Meowface · ‎05-09-2017

Hi Louise, I recently joined too and I think a lot of readers will relate to those consuming thoughts and worry. I was bullied at a workplace years ago and it left me quite traumatised when making mistakes at work. If I made a mistake or thought I'd made one I would start to sweat profusely (attractive...not), my mouth would dry up, my heart would beat so fast I could hear it in my ears and I'd shake. I'd think of the worst case scenario like I'd get fired or go to jail (??? this makes no sense I know) and just freeze. I found therapy really helpful to overcome this and worked with a psychologist referred by my GP - it was Cognitive Behaviour Therapy (CBT) which helped me understand my feelings better. If you haven't spoken to someone yet I would definitely encourage you to.

MarkJT · ‎05-09-2017

Hey Louise and Meowface, I want to welcome both of you to the beyondblue forums. This placed is full of people with lived experience of mental health conditions and is fully supportive with zero judgment.

Both of you are being treated and that is the most important thing but have either of you heard of mindfulness?

It is a type of meditation and works a treat. I use it heaps and it helps me massive with my anxiety.

It is about living in the present and not worrying about the future, nor the past. When your anxiety is coming on, it helps you ground yourself and prevent the attack.

There is a couple of really good apps that can help you with it - Smiling Mind and Buddhify.

The best thing about it is that you can do it anywhere at anytime so when i get anxious at work, I can look at things, like the sky, the clouds, buildings etc and it takes my mind of what is making me anxious.

One thing is for certain, you two are not alone in your journeys - there are literally thousands of people in the community that live with anxiety daily.

Mark.

Louise24 · ‎06-09-2017

Hi Mark,

Thanks for your response! I will definitely be trying these apps as the anxiety is getting to a stage where it affects me daily. I have been off work which I think isn't helping because I have a lot more time to think, but when I'm at work I also get anxious a lot about different scenarios.

Im now nervous to go back to work in case I have another bad panic attack but I know sitting at home isn't helping either.

Will look into the apps. Thank you!

MarkJT · ‎06-09-2017

Louise, the good old "getting anxious about getting anxious" trick. Sucks hey!

When I feel anxiety rising, I stop what i am doing and tell myself that i am safe. I then start to deep breath, concentrating on it closely - in - hold - out. Repeat.

I then look for bright colors in your surroundings, listen to some music, go for a run, use touch to distract the mind also.

Learning to control your anxiety is a process. You won't master it overnight so just chip away here and there.

Keep coming back and checking in and I will join you on your journey.

Mark

Roonil_Wazlib · ‎07-09-2017

Hi everyone,

I can definitely relate to this too. In addition to things I said or did recently, I still think about things I said or did years ago and will agonise over them for ages. It is awful and I have no control over it as it'd just suddenly appear out of no where. I saw a psychologist for a while for anxiety and a whole bunch of things so I'm aware of what I do now but managing is still so difficult.

Thank you Mark for your suggestions! I'm downloading Smiling Mind as we speak. I definitely think that I worry about the future and the past way too much so what you said was spot on.

MarkJT · ‎07-09-2017

Roonil Wazlib, hey welcome to the forums! Great place to learn and chat to people with lived experience.

You mention that you saw a psych a while ago. Are you still seeing one? If you are not, I would well recommend getting back and having some more treatment.

My psych appointments are now three months apart and are generally a check in and not much more but i still like going. Keeping continuity of my treatment.

With things said and done in the past, you have to find a way to move on. What has happened, has happened and I know this is a whole lot easier said than done, it is something that you have to work on doing.

One thing I do every now and then is message or email or talk to someone that had an influence on me over the years. Without, and this is the key, expecting anything in return, thank them for what they did. This is practicing gratitude and gratitude is one of three key items that i do to build my resilience.

The other two are empathy and mindfulness. Smiling Mind will take care of your mindfulness so if you be empathetic, you should and can build your resilience.

Once your resilience is higher, anxiety becomes easier to control.

Pretty simple hey!!...NOT....but it is a step at a time. This is a marathon not a sprint and you have this forum to help guide you and support you through the journey.

Mark.

Roonil_Wazlib · ‎07-09-2017

Hi Mark,

I used up my mental health care plan for the year but it's just ticked over so I've actually made an appointment with my GP and psych already.

I messaged a lot of friends recently actually just to thank them. So many of them have been so supportive with my mental health and I just needed them to know how much I love and appreciate them.

Thanks for all your help!

MarkJT · ‎08-09-2017

Roonil, awesome by you. That is so cool.

Unfortunately so many people with mental health conditions do not want to tell their mates for fear of being abandoned and so much of that time, they would get some really good support.

You have no such concerns. Love it.

Mark.

startingnew · ‎08-09-2017

Hi Louise welcome to the forums, im glad you being here is a relief for you. it really is a great community.

i like what both of the guys here have said.

i do the same thing about getting anxious because im anxious but this is the time to STOP, breathe and think of your next move, and implement some of those coping strategies that you psychologist is helping you with.

i have a few strategies that might help you. ive got some for panic attacks, grounding yourself and also problem solving. just give me a few minutes to find and type them up for you

again welcome 🙂