I can't handle the social anxiety anymore
I can relate a little to how you are feeling. I know putting yourself in a different environment with all new faces can be a scary thing. I felt that way when I started my current job, I found it hard to talk to anyone so I just stayed quiet most of the time. I also find it a challenge to have a conversation with some one because I worry about saying something I will regret and embarrassing myself, because once you say something you can't un-say it!
I often wonder if I am liked or not by my co workers and how they feel about me, and I really hope nobody dislikes me, because I always try to be nice to everyone. So I tell myself that if they really did not like me then they would have let me know by now, and since I have lasted as long as I have then I figure they at least must feel neutral about me rather than dislike me.
I am consumed with negative thoughts myself, it can be really sad, and even scary, I'm not sure about anti-depressants but talking to someone might help. If you need someone to talk to, I would be glad to chat with you, I also need someone to talk to now. Please don't feel embarrassed either because I am not a judgmental person and I am very compassionate and I would never be insensitive.
Keep doing your best.