Feeling miserable at school and I can't move
School this year has been really bad. I don't have anymore friends, I'm always alone, and it's also 30 minutes away from me, meaning I have to walk for 25 minutes to my bus stop, take the bus for 30 minutes, then walk up a steep and long hill to get to school each morning. I get tired during class, and it gets hard to concentrate. I've had no motivation to do well at all, and being alone at school does not help. Most students in my year level are racist and act a certain way towards me because I'm asian. I've tried making friends, but people don't seem to want to talk to me. I hate my school. I decided it was best for me to move schools asap for a fresh start, but the problem is that most good schools are too far away.
I eventually found a school that was about 8 minutes away from where I live and my parents had contacted the school about moving, but they had replied to us saying it wasn't likely that I'd be able to move there this year. I don't want to stay at my current school for another year. It is so draining, mentally and physically. I don't know what to do, I don't have any other choice but to stay at the school for the rest of this year and I don't want to keep getting more and more miserable each day.
Please know that you've come to a safe, non-judgemental space to talk things through and our community is here to offer as much support, advice and conversation as you need. We're sure that a lot of our community members will relate to these feelings and hopefully some of them will pop by to offer you words of wisdom and kindness.
It sounds like you are really struggling with the school you are at for a number of reasons. Its horrible that people at school treat you differently and that you feel alienated from them and not included, that is a very painful thing to go through.
If you feel it may be helpful, you are always welcome to get in touch with Kids Helpline. They are a confidential and anonymous, telephone and online counselling service specifically for young people aged 25 and under. Their number is 1800 55 1800. We would really encourage you to speak to one of the counsellors there about how school is effecting you at the moment. It could be really helpful as its very hard to be feeling alone with such feelings.
Also, If you are interested in more ongoing support, we would also recommend getting in touch with an organisation called Headspace. Headspace is an organisation specifically for young people aged 12-25 and they offer a wide range of services including group programs which are a great opportunity to meet people. They also have a group chat on their webpage.
I’ll echo that welcome to the Forum, it is a safe place where you will meet understanding and a desire to help – nothing else. Sophie has given some very useful advice.
Reading your story it looks like there are three things all bound together.
One is the treatment by uncivilized little bigots. You can see them for what they are but even so over time it wears you down and makes you very reluctant to show up. When you do so much energy and concentration is taken up in dealing with them you have little left
Second is being tired and losing concentration in class. Perhaps, apart from the other kids and your long journey there may be another factor. How is your physical health?
Thirdly you have no motivation, a sad thing as you are a proactive person, trying to cope by attempting to make friends and search out schools. Unfortunately you are dealing with adult problems, unfair at your age, however I’ve confidence from the way you write and your understanding of things you with get though this.
At least your parents sound on-side – one worry less -and tried that closer school.
May I suggest a couple of things?
First have your parents take you to your GP and get a checkup, both physical and mental. Set out all that has been happening, your tiredness and lack of motivation and the effect your current school is having on you, getting worse all the time. See where that takes you.
Also such things as good diet and controlled exercise and sleep can help you get though the day. (Yes, I know, boring and seems to miss the point)
Second don’t give up on making friendships. In a whole school that are all types of kids, many tribal and not worth the time of day, but the occasional one who is worth knowing and acts in a human fashion. Also there may well be others with problems similar to your own for other reasons, being together can give each of you support and company.
Other than the above my only other suggestion is if you have a school counselor or teacher you have confidence in have a talk with them and see where it leads.
Please let us know how you get on