dropping out of high school- what do i do now

spontaneous sunflower · ‎30-01-2020

I am 17 and this year is supposed to be my final year of high school (year 12). I mentioned in another post that due to anxiety and depression that resulted in me not passing a couple of my classes, instead of graduating this year I would be graduating in 2021. Basically spreading out year 12 over two years. I was hesitant to make this decision at first, because of what people might think (don't care about that anymore) but more so, I wasn't sure it would make much of a difference to my mental health. But I decided it would put less stress and pressure on me, and that was that. So I thought..

I didn't attend headstart classes at the end of last year. I don't even know what subjects I'm doing and I'll probably wind up with subjects I don't really like because I missed out. I've been pretty happy these summer holidays, going to the beach, hanging out with friends/family, etc. Majority of the days/moments where I felt anxious, depressed or upset were when I was reminded of the approaching school year. On Jan 1st, I quite literally broke down in tears telling my mum I couldn't go to school anymore. I can't do it anymore. For 5 years I've been struggling, I've seen multiple professionals, been put on medication, created plans with teachers, moved schools... and I still can barely get through a school year. And I'm smart, I get good grades, I enjoy learning. But I don't like school. I can't stand it.

I guess I want to drop out. I literally don't know how to finish high school. Doesn't matter if I could graduate this year, or next year, I can't do it. I am so exhausted of feeling like shit all the time. The problem is if I drop out I'm not entirely sure what to do. Like I could go do a course at tafe, but I wouldn't know which one to do and where it would take me. Like could I somehow go to tafe now and then go to uni later? If it helps to know, I was interested in doing a media and communications course at uni. My interests are travelling, writing and photography.

If anyone knows what my options are if I leave high school, please let me know. I don't want to end up working at maccas or whatever for the rest of my life, I want to accomplish great things. But i swear if I went back to high school, I would burn myself out in no time. I'm already holding on by a thread. I don't think I could handle another year of struggling with school. I don't think I've properly enjoyed my life in 3 years and I can honestly say it's because of school. I just want to live my life

Yimchi · ‎31-01-2020

Hi Spontaneus Sunflower,
I read through your post and have discovered I'm in exactly the same position as you and feel the exact same way as you. Last year I didn't attend a single class throughout semester 2 due to depression and anxiety and received an N for my unit 2 subjects. I went back for headstart but then during the holidays thought otherwise of going back. It's nice to know I'm at least not alone with this feeling.

Deckt · ‎31-01-2020

I think that one of the biggest disservices that society spreads is that if you don't finish high school, don't go to uni that it will affect the rest of your life. It's simply not true.

I didn't have a great time in high school either. I had no idea what I wanted out of life, and unfortunately, didn't have much guidance.

You need to take care of your mental health. That is way more important than a year 12 certificate. You can go back after a break. You can go to TAFE, or look into other study programs. You could start an apprenticeship. You can go to uni later in life. You can get a job. There are many, many options available. The important thing to remember is that every day is a new opportunity to try something different. You are young, which means you have plenty of time to figure out what you want out of life, and how to get it. I'm showing my age a bit with this song, but give it a listen. Particularly the part about advice. 🙂

Deckt · ‎31-01-2020

Ok, didn't realise that we can't post links.

The song is called Everybodys Free (to wear sunscreen). It's on YouTube.

Zephyrus · ‎02-02-2020

Hi Sunflower,

I went through the exact same thing. I was halfway through year 10 and hating even just the thought of going to school. I stopping going altogether shortly after I had confessed this to my Mum. I had a long period of randomness until I found my way through to my passion which is now what I do day in, day out.

There is always a path to what you want, especially if you want it bad enough, you'll find the way. It might not be the way society dictates you go about things and that's okay. There's nothing wrong with doing things a different way, the way that's right for you. That takes care of you is every way, shape or form. I spent some time to figure out what I truly wanted to do, everything else didn't matter. I luckily found it and worked my way there. I spent two years in TAFE leading up to my Uni degree which I am due to finish in May of this year. I am so glad I did things the way I did because it was right for me.

Do things how you need to, the way you feel is right.

linkyia · ‎04-08-2020

Hi! im in the exact same position atm, i have only around a term and a half left of school but im so drained and exhausted and MISERABLE, i haven't been for half the term and am finding it hard to keep going, im considering dropping out, what did you do?

Brightside0208 · ‎04-08-2020

Hey Linkyia,

If you're interested I was in a similar situation, missing a lot of school and struggling with my mental health in year 11 and 12.

I ended up leaving high school at the start of year 12 because I was caring for my mum, and everything was just getting really overwhelming and I was falling behind.

It was a really difficult decision to make, and I was really unsure of what I was going to do next. Honestly, it did create some obstacles for me when I realised what I did want to do a bit later in life.

Despite that, I'm currently back studying a diploma as a pathway to a degree in order to become a paramedic, and I'm loving it.

Leaving school when I did gave me the time and space to work through a really difficult time in my life, without having to balance studies on top of that, and that allowed me to learn and grow a lot.
It's also what put me on the path to finding my passion, and its not that bad getting back in to studies a little bit later in life (stated this year, just turned 24) so it isn't always a bad thing.

My advice to you would be to reach out to your school for some support and guidance, have a conversation with the people close to you. If you find the strength to get through, it is a good thing to have. But if you need to you shouldn't be afraid to put your education on hold to look after yourself.

You can always go back and finish it later, or go through a certificate course at TAFE or similar to help secure a career you enjoy later on.

Do what you think is best for you, don't second guess yourself, and do your best to make a decent plan for whats next, and you'll be fine.

linkyia · ‎05-08-2020

Hi! i have been to my school counsellors and support team when i have managed to go for a day but nothing is really working for me, i have just finished a business diploma course so i have something to leave with if i chose to leave. If i were to drop out i was going to go into a photography tafe course and work on the side. as much as i'd love to keep going onwards with school its just making my mental health spiral and suffer, im really uncertain with what to do but i feel like dropping out of high school would be the best thing for me to take time and recover.

linkyia · ‎05-08-2020

Also, thank you so much for your words and advice, its a lot of help and gives me more to think about 🙂

SarahZ · ‎05-08-2020

Hello spontaneous sunflower,

Thanks for reaching out. I'm glad to hear you enjoyed yourself these summer holidays. School is always daunting and is something many people do not look forward to. The pressures from teachers, parents, and even from yourself to do well can be exceptionally hard to deal with. I remember year 12 was a nightmare for me. After telling your mum your feeling towards attending school what was her reaction?

I definitely agree with what @Deckt mentioned - heaps of people who don't finish school do exceptionally well. School does not equate to a future. School may perhaps teach you different types of skills and knowledge; however, you can gain knowledge from various different outlets. For example, travelling can give you tremendously rich knowledge in areas which attending school cannot. I know you don't wish to work at somewhere like maccas, however, even retail/hospitality jobs give you skills that attending school cannot.

I see you listed your interests as travelling, writing and photography, which is terrific. What if you take a gap year and just play around with writing and photography? (due to covid i assume travelling is most likely out of the question for now). Theres no rush to do anything. It's important to enjoy yourself, test out the waters, and see what you're really passionate about. The last thing you want to do is to attend a uni course you hate and end up with a job you hate. Life isn't about conforming to societal norms and expectations - that would give life no proper purpose. My advice is enjoy yourself while you're young and try new things out. Perhaps even get in touch with your school career counsellor (if your school has one) to map out different pathways you can take if you do end up deciding to attend university.

Please keep us updated if you feel up to it!

Wishing you all the best and sending you positive thoughts 🙂