Young people

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Eeep! When study is overwhelming! - Tips, ideas and coping strategies

replies: 51

Hi! Just thought I’d make a post with some tips for study. I know this is something we can all struggle with. These are all suggestions so feel free to take them or leave them! Hope they help! If you only remember one thing, let it be this: You are important. Your grades don’t define you. (support) Studying can feel isolating but know you’re not alone! Reach out – and find or make friends that can support you along the way. If you’re having trouble finding some friends, join some local communities or clubs! They have lots at Uni’s and even stuff like open days are great ways to meet new people and find out what’s happening. Study groups can also be a great way to meet people and stay motivated. Also remind yourself why you’re doing this; inspirational wallpapers or quotes can be super inspiring. Remember the saying about the oxygen mask? If you can’t take care of yourself first studying will be harder. You are important. You know the drill - water, food, exercise, sleep. Try to stay calm. Stuff that might be able to help include mindfulness, breathing exercises, colouring in, going for walks, journaling, listening to music… If you’re struggling – reach out. See a therapist. Talk to your student counsellor. If you need help, don’t be afraid to ask for it. Also lots of Universities and TAFE offer disability services – which includes conditions like Depression and Anxiety. (study) Find the right study space for you. Maybe that’s in your room, or a coffee shop, or the library. Some people find that noise helps; other people not so much. If you like particular kinds of noise, you can find ‘coffee shop’ noise or ‘rain sounds’ to help concentrate. Make a plan. It helps to do it often so it becomes a habit. Anytime you get a due date, write it down. Maybe you could use a diary, planner, bullet journal or an app. I find the 30/30 App helpful - study for a bit and then break for a bit. You can also get add-on’s for your computer to block sites like Facebook if you find them too distracting. Find out what study technique works for you. Do you like cue cards? Mind maps? Colour coding? Does highlighting stuff help you remember? Charts, maps, diagrams? Recorded lectures? Goals! These are so important – not just writing down deadlines but rewarding yourself for meeting them. Even making smaller goals like ‘read two pages from a textbook’ can help. Break it down into bite size pieces, and don’t forget to reward yourself after!

NEW TO THIS FORUM? Please read this first

replies: 0

The Young People space is a sub-forum within the wider Beyond Blue forum community. 1. Its purpose is to provide members aged 25 and under a space to discuss anxiety, depression and other related life issues. If you are aged over 25, please be mindful that this forum is a space for younger people to connect and provide peer support for each other. 2. Content from this sub-forum is displayed on both the beyondblue and youthbeyondblue websites. 3. Please bear in mind that some members find content relating to suicide and/or self-harm distressing or triggering. If you would like to post on these topics, please do so in our Suicidal Thoughts and Self Harm section. Please see also our guidelines for making posts on this topic. Posts made here in the Young People sub-forum containing content relating to suicide and/or self-harm will be moved. 4. These forums are moderated, so your posts may not appear straightaway. Information on how our system works can be found here. Being familiar with our community rules can help ensure that your posts appear online as quickly as possible. 5. This is a peer support community, and to get the best out of being here we recommend that you 'give support to receive support'. More on how that works here.

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I have an appointment with a new psychiatrist in less than 36 minutes: Very nervous

replies: 2

Today is the big day, I have an appointment with a new psychiatrist in less than 36 minutes. I am very nervous and anxious; I hope the psychiatrist believes me

Heard horrifying news about my Ex-Girlfriend who i care about and still had feelings for.

replies: 30

My Ex and i have been broken up for a year and all that time i was following strict NC (No Contact, when you completely block them out of your life). I am 19 and she is 20. We finally spoke after she reached out to me and i allowed the phone call, the news and information i heard about her life threw me into shock and trauma. She had a boyfriend that beat her, she got seriously into hard drugs (such as heroin and cocaine) and can't get off them, adding to this she took up a job as a stripper. This was a lot for me to handle as i had been struggling the entire year trying to get over her and then to hear all of this terrible news really shook me. In addition, i have mild jealousy issues and mood disorders such as OCD so it makes the whole ideal worse, i can't stop ruminating about the horrible things that would have happened to her in the past year and i often think this will scar me forever. The emotions i feel are Guilt, sadness and jealousy. We dated for 1.5 years, she was my first girlfriend, my first love and we had a very intense relationship so seeing her like this is very very disheartening and makes me extremely sad. I wish i could help her but i can't and i had to block her again and im just still in a state of shock. I alerted my parents about it just so they understand what im going through. Please help

everything is beginning to build up and im struggling

replies: 13

Hi, i'm a new member and i just wanted to get some advice about my current situation! im a very active person, and i constantly strive to get fitter and stronger but the last two years have been really hard, ive dived in and out of binge eating and bulimia and in a way i think its because when i get fitter and stronger my figure isnt as skinny as nice as models, and all my family members constantly make comments about my weight and my figure and keeping myself slimmer, or as a girl i shouldn't be aiming to to so sporty, i'm not going to become a professional athlete anyway. Of course im not going to become an athlete but i don't see any reason i shouldnt be able to play sport. ive been forced to quit sports that i love so dearly because it gives me broad shoulders, or big legs and ive been told to go on long runs which i hate just to lose weight because my parents think my muscle is fat. my mum is incredibly strict on her own diet, constantly weighing herself and showing off her weight, and even my dad says he wont accept it if im not a certain weight. this was a while ago but it still hurts so much. ive recently had both a meniscus and ACL injury from football and my surgery was in late August. that means a full year before i am allowed to play any kind of contact sports and its been about 48 days and ive only just started to be able to squat again. When i first heard about my injury i was so, so, so devastated. i was about to start my rowing season and i was ready to get fitter and fitter. being unable to do sport but still being hungry all the time while doing nothing is so hard. i cannot lose weight or get fitter being unable to do anything. my mum says shes glad i wasn't able to row becuase it would give me broad shoulders. i don't understand why its up to her what my body should look like. but at the same time while i love getting fitter and stronger, i don't like how my body looks and i still need to reduce my body fat %. my family members keep giving me backhanded compliments, saying oh your legs look SO NICE now, because i haven't been able to work out and theyve slimmed down to a more feminine shape and it makes me feel so bad when they comment on it literally everyday. i feel like im not understood and i really wish i was

its getting bad again

replies: 5

recently everything has been getting a bit overwhelming and hard to deal with. i feel like constantly venting to my friends will make them hate me eventually, and I don't want to ruin more of my relationships. I'm lacking the motivation to do anything and my parents contribute to that. they don't believe that their child has feelings and might not be constantly well. I've been really down; school work is piling up, I lost most of my closest friends and my boyfriend of 9 months broke up with me last month. the constant pressure im faced with is so stressful and scary. my brother is a high achiever and does well in school and many other things. compared to him im quite literally garbage. i have no one to talk to so I decided here might be a good place. I'm always the friend that gives advice and comfort when people vent. Although it may not be helpful I try my best to say things that will make them feel better. But no one does that for me. I told a friend I wasn't well earlier and all I got in response was "unfortunate". things like that make me want to never open up again. why cant they at least try to be there for me when im always there for them? i think im depressed, or maybe i have anxiety. a few weeks ago i was uncontrollably panicking after an argument and i had to shove my face into a blanket to calm down. I've never experienced that before and there was such a strong urge for me to self harm but i didn't. a few years ago i opened up to a friend and told her i was self harming. she was the only person i told and she said something along the lines of "if you don't want to talk about it we don't have to" then changed the subject. was it not obvious that i wanted to talk about it? i think she wasn't taking me seriously, i thought what i was doing wasn't even self harm for a while. anyways i think i might become a bit more active here on the forums

lots of pressure

replies: 6

Hi, I don't know if this where I should put this. lately I haven't been feeling great, I'm currently trying to get in to a very hard degree where I need really good grades and I feel like I'm putting a lot of pressure on myself. I have this friend who is constantly in my space making me feel suffocated, like I'm constantly needing to compete especially when it comes to grades, a boyfriend who all he needs is space so its making me feel kinda not important (we're long distance due to covid), parents who are making me chose between my partner and them due to him not wanting to get vaccinated. I'm feeling extremely overwhelmed with my work load and keep having panic attacks at night when I got to bed. I feel very tired like the energy is being sucked out of me. I don't feel the urge to eat much and when I do I feel guilty, I've had an unhealthy relationship with food in the past and I got better but all this stress is triggering emotions and things I had already over come in the past. It feels like I've failed myself I go to the gym as my way to relax but my friend from earlier always comes with me. I feel incredible anxious, like I can't get my peace of mind

Overwhelming feelings and coming across something Uncomfortable

replies: 11

Hey I’m not a social media kind of person, I have Facebook because my friends use messenger more than texting to contact each other. So that’s the only reason why I have it. I check off Facebook notifications so that don’t annoy me on my phone and something happened that made me feel uncomfortable. When I was checking off a video notification, I randomly scrolled down where it showed random suggestion of what is popular on Facebook at the time. Random stuff and one result came up was a video called "How to Catch a Cheater" where a guy sets up a scenario with a fake model to helps girlfriends see if their boyfriends are cheats. Except it went too far and the model got the guy to cheat. It was really disgusting to see something like that on Facebook. The girlfriend was really upset. I feel bad I ended watching the whole video. I don't support that at all and I can't believe it was on social media like that. What a creep. I blocked it as soon as the video was over so that way it doesn't come up again. But I feel very uncomfortable after seeing that. I wouldn't actively go searching for something like that. I thought it was some reality TV garbage. I’m a bad person? What doesn't help is at the moment I've been having these overwhelming feelings of arousal and reaction to the opposite gender. No matter what the situation is, there is no filter, I feel like I get rooted in the spot and there's a part of my brain that takes over and I'm trying to fight it. I'm finding ways of trying to sort these feelings out and have better control. But when I came across the video by accident, I felt that overwhelming reaction root me to the spot. It makes me feel horrible, I didn't want to watch it but my mind wouldn't let me turn away and I really wanted to turn away. I want to be nothing else but respectfully towards women. So am I a bad person?

Girlfriend and family problems

replies: 4

Hey guys, I'm knew here so I just thought I'd tell my story, give us your thoughts. So I'm 14 years old, I have a gf, 4 sisters, and my mum and stepdad. All of my sisters have moved out I'm the youngest, I haven't seen my real father since I was 9 years old. I rang him one night because I was sick of having to visit him because he is always doing drugs, so I rang him and told him to choose between me and drugs, and he said "I would choose drugs over you anyday". My mum was already seperated from him by then so it was easy for me to not have to see him. My stepdad treats my mum a lot better but after my real father left I have really bad trust issues, so I'm not to sure how to feel about him, even though my mum got married to him this year. He is very strict and doesn't allow me to use my phone after 7:30 which is really hard because my gf is always on her phone at night time and not much during the day so this doesn't give me much time to talk to her. I also can't take my phone out of the loungeroom (which he has a security camera in) because he won't let me. I'm not even allowed to see my gf because both of our parents hate each other so this leaves me and my gf in a very difficult spot. It's also really hard because my gf's mum took my gf's phone so I have no way of contacting her, we also don't even go to the same school and covid has interrupted our relationship because we would generally sneak out to see each other when our parents went to work. This would allow us to see each other otherwise we wouldn't be able to. I've spent nights crying just because I can't see her more often and it's taking away at my mental health and idk how to deal with it. My gf is my everything I've gained so much love for her in our 6 short months together, we have only seen each other twice. At the start of mine and my gf's relationship was our hardest period (because I actually met her at the show and it was basically love at first sight because at the end of that night I knew she was perfect) , because we don't go to the same school all the guys at her school were saying that I was cheating on her and I think that was even harder because I couldn't be there and show her just how much I care, because after all texting can only go so far. All these things on top of; studies, Covid lockdown, work, and my sporting career leaves me in a really difficult situations and sometimes makes me feel hopeless and suicidal.

25 feel like I’m having a qtr life crisis, lacking in hope and motivation to move forward

replies: 13

Hi there I’m a 25 year old male whose single and I feel like I’m slowly hitting a wall each day. Things I used to enjoy don’t faze me anymore, my life seems like a repeating cycle of spending each day working but also replaying the same thoughts of being alone over and over again. I have been trying to meet a partner and it is just a constant source of disappointment, I don’t see any light at the end of the tunnel…online dating apps contribute to this as I do not get any matches at all and when I do it’s fleeting. from the outside looking in it would seem I have a good social network but I do not feel part of anything and never have, I have no outlet and things I would do to distract myself are no longer working I feel lost and do not have a clue who I am or are supposed to be, feelings of complete hopelessness are what I carry each down and I just spend most of the time flat and down although I can mask it around family. I do not have any suicidal tendencies and I would not do anything like that for my family’s sake but I am questioning what is the purpose of everything I do when I just feel inherently alone

Falling apart, meeting a psychiatrist in mid ish October for ADHD and very scared

replies: 3

Hello, I have a first appointment with the second psychiatrist in mid October and I am very scared and anxious. The first time I visited the psychiatrist (not the ones I have booked with in October), it was nothing but an absolute train wreck, she didn't believe I had depression or ADHD. To the point, where she said I should stop being tired and form habits. I am scared and very anxious that the psychiatrist will not believe I have any difficulties in life. I am scared that he will think I am a drug seeker, despite me not ever taking drugs, scared that he will say it's all in my head, scared that he will send me off and not help. I am barely functioning right now, I am constantly tired, cannot think properly, constant brain fog, pacing extensively for several hours, forgetting appointment, forgetting bills, spending money impulsively, relying on my mum to take care of cause i can't, hygiene maintenance, fired from two jobs and withdrawn from uni 7 times. i am not functioning, I was prescribed anti depressants, and they made me feel dumb and shaky. I feel like all the doors in life are closing, all my opportunities closed, I can barely even believe that this me and I am very scared that I will be homeless because of these issues. I want to be functional, I want to be productive, I want to work and study, I want to lead an independent life, but at this moment with this brain, I can't. And I don't think I can handle another psychiatrist appointment where either they say I'm depressed or stop being tired. I have goals I want to achieve, I know what I need to do to achieve them, so why isn't there any psychiatrist who can help me. I can't access psychologists because the ones who specialise in ADHD are booked out or there is no ADHD psychologists. I am fed up and exhausted. The school reports I plan to bring don't indicate any mental health issues, and I can't bring my family over since they don't believe in mental health at all. I'm genuinely afraid that I will be seen as someone who is just another ice addict who wants ADHD meds. Trying to access an adult ADHD assessment as a 21 yr old makes me feel like I'm being treated as a criminal or drug addict by the whole mental health system. I am willing to undergo randomised drug testing if it means the psychiatrist can properly evaluate me when it comes to assessment. I don't want to live like this, I don't want to be a burden, pacing extensively for hours because you can't sit still is not depression

Feeling ashamed to be a White Male

replies: 32

I'm a male myself and I have NEVER EVER been sexist or disrespectful or racist to anyone ever. Not now, not EVER!!!! But I feel like what ever I come across in media, it feels like all I hear is "White Males Are Bad". When I watch shows like Charmed and I come across certain scenes where Males are regarded as bad people, it makes me feel uncomfortable. You got shows like the Neighbourhood sitcom that I came across where they cover racism where a black guy gets put in a jail cell for being black which is so NOT fair whatsoever. And the main lead says the police system is working the right way for white guys but not black people or any other culture. And white people will never understand whatsoever the pain other people go through. And they whole policeman beating up a black guy which leads to the black lives matter movement. I feel like I'm ashamed of all these bad things happening even though I have done NOTHING to do with anything of that bad stuff. But because of the long history I hear of white males doing bad stuff, I feel like I have to be responsible for that or feel as though it's my fault. It may sound silly but I feel like all I hear is White Males are bad and cause problems. I feel like if I see someone in pain or needs help, I want to be able to help or show support no matter what their colour or background is. We are all still human beings after all and all this dumb bad stuff like racism and sexism shouldn't be around any more. Nor should it have existed in the first place. I hate the fact that bad stuff like this still happens and I feel helpless to see it pop up in media or fiction. I felt ashamed to be a white male so many times and my friend says I shouldn't, all that stuff isn't my fault and I shouldn't take on the responsibility of other people's actions that I don't even know. Focus on my own actions and what I can change. But because all that stuff happens, I feel like I get stuffed into a category where I'm a white male and are automatically the enemy. And no matter how hard I try to help and try to show that not all white males are bad, I feel like I can't make a positive difference. Like I'm powerless to make a positive change so people can see not all white males are bad people, or even white people in general. I want to be able to try and understand what others are going through as well as try to stop bad things from happening.

Eeep! When study is overwhelming! - Tips, ideas and coping strategies replies: 51

NEW TO THIS FORUM? Please read this first replies: 0

I have an appointment with a new psychiatrist in less than 36 minutes: Very nervous replies: 2

Heard horrifying news about my Ex-Girlfriend who i care about and still had feelings for. replies: 30

everything is beginning to build up and im struggling replies: 13

its getting bad again replies: 5

lots of pressure replies: 6

Overwhelming feelings and coming across something Uncomfortable replies: 11

Girlfriend and family problems replies: 4

25 feel like I’m having a qtr life crisis, lacking in hope and motivation to move forward replies: 13

Falling apart, meeting a psychiatrist in mid ish October for ADHD and very scared replies: 3

Feeling ashamed to be a White Male replies: 32