Young people

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Eeep! When study is overwhelming! - Tips, ideas and coping strategies

replies: 51

Hi! Just thought I’d make a post with some tips for study. I know this is something we can all struggle with. These are all suggestions so feel free to take them or leave them! Hope they help! If you only remember one thing, let it be this: You are important. Your grades don’t define you. (support) Studying can feel isolating but know you’re not alone! Reach out – and find or make friends that can support you along the way. If you’re having trouble finding some friends, join some local communities or clubs! They have lots at Uni’s and even stuff like open days are great ways to meet new people and find out what’s happening. Study groups can also be a great way to meet people and stay motivated. Also remind yourself why you’re doing this; inspirational wallpapers or quotes can be super inspiring. Remember the saying about the oxygen mask? If you can’t take care of yourself first studying will be harder. You are important. You know the drill - water, food, exercise, sleep. Try to stay calm. Stuff that might be able to help include mindfulness, breathing exercises, colouring in, going for walks, journaling, listening to music… If you’re struggling – reach out. See a therapist. Talk to your student counsellor. If you need help, don’t be afraid to ask for it. Also lots of Universities and TAFE offer disability services – which includes conditions like Depression and Anxiety. (study) Find the right study space for you. Maybe that’s in your room, or a coffee shop, or the library. Some people find that noise helps; other people not so much. If you like particular kinds of noise, you can find ‘coffee shop’ noise or ‘rain sounds’ to help concentrate. Make a plan. It helps to do it often so it becomes a habit. Anytime you get a due date, write it down. Maybe you could use a diary, planner, bullet journal or an app. I find the 30/30 App helpful - study for a bit and then break for a bit. You can also get add-on’s for your computer to block sites like Facebook if you find them too distracting. Find out what study technique works for you. Do you like cue cards? Mind maps? Colour coding? Does highlighting stuff help you remember? Charts, maps, diagrams? Recorded lectures? Goals! These are so important – not just writing down deadlines but rewarding yourself for meeting them. Even making smaller goals like ‘read two pages from a textbook’ can help. Break it down into bite size pieces, and don’t forget to reward yourself after!

NEW TO THIS FORUM? Please read this first

replies: 0

The Young People space is a sub-forum within the wider Beyond Blue forum community. 1. Its purpose is to provide members aged 25 and under a space to discuss anxiety, depression and other related life issues. If you are aged over 25, please be mindful that this forum is a space for younger people to connect and provide peer support for each other. 2. Content from this sub-forum is displayed on both the beyondblue and youthbeyondblue websites. 3. Please bear in mind that some members find content relating to suicide and/or self-harm distressing or triggering. If you would like to post on these topics, please do so in our Suicidal Thoughts and Self Harm section. Please see also our guidelines for making posts on this topic. Posts made here in the Young People sub-forum containing content relating to suicide and/or self-harm will be moved. 4. These forums are moderated, so your posts may not appear straightaway. Information on how our system works can be found here. Being familiar with our community rules can help ensure that your posts appear online as quickly as possible. 5. This is a peer support community, and to get the best out of being here we recommend that you 'give support to receive support'. More on how that works here.

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I Hate Being Myself and Want to Get Better.

replies: 5

I've hated every second of being myself for about 10 years now and it's really starting to snowball and affect me in several different ways in my day to day life. But I feel too guilty to seek help since many others have it far worse than I do. It just feels like all the stress, anxiety, depressed thoughts and my self-hatred has been bottling up for years now and I don’t know how much longer I can keep these thoughts repressed, I’m also too scared to speak to my friends and family about my mental health issues. I don’t want to weird them out since when I am usually around people, I put on a façade of someone who is a happy-go lucky, sometimes smartass, who is in general an optimistic person. The few times I have cracked this façade around other people such as my dad the support from them has been less than optimal and its clear that they want me to go back to the way I ‘normally’ am. I’m not sure what to do anymore I feel like no one cares about me and no one will ever love me I just want to feel happy or not feel at all anymore. I used to think that I can still be useful to people which has kind of stopped me from taking any extreme actions against myself but lately that feeling is being eroded away. Sorry for the rant but any advice you can give me regarding how I’m feeling will be greatly appreciated.

Dealing with deep thoughts and overthinking

replies: 4

Hi. Just come here to talk about it, see others' viewpoints. My name is sam, and I am on here to talk about my anxiety. Basically, since I was young I have struggled with overthinking and my deep passion. It's like there's a deep desire that can never be filled. Feels like I'm lifting a boulder over my head at times, my mind turns on me a lot, but I never show it and I often feel like its hard to show but easy to feel. I had an alright childhood, but my parents used to fight a lot and my dad was very inconsistent in the way he behaved, with him often threatening my mum and being overly focused on his own spirituality. Adversity has followed me everywhere as well. I come from a religious family and I feel like It messed me up a bit, because most people arent spiritual. My mum has it hard, as she's single, works full time, and looks after all my various siblings. I don't know how to find a sense of peace in myself and I feel like people don't understand me. The first abit of my life i was fine, until i got close to the first partner I had, and I realized how overly emotional I was. So far its been a solo ride, and I have figured out the issues with-in. I feel a deep sense of confusion with god, why am I so afraid of love when im so good at giving and being selfless.

I think I actually am doing it for attention

replies: 4

Hi, I don't know what's wrong with me or if anything's wrong at all but I think I'm doing it for attention. I know everyone says that but I genuinely think I am. Some days I feel absolutely fine but then some days I'm horribly anxious for no reason at all and some days I feel just empty inside and feel like I'm just distracting myself with everyday activities. But I also don't know if I'm actually feeling these things or just making them up for a diagnosis because i think it'll make me feel special. I am currently in therapy for anxious thoughts but I can't really seem to tell them anything aside from surface level stuff. The thing that concerns me is that whenever I hear/read about a mental disorder I try and match myself to it and imagine myself getting diagnosed with it. Also whenever I hear about someone doing something due to their mental illness, i automatically think "maybe I can do that then I'll get diagnosed" but then I get really sad and scared that I thought that. Because I think these things any time I am actually feeling sad or anxious or numb or whatever, I tell myself that I'm just doing it for attention and because I want a diagnosis. I have actually had anxiety attacks but I don't know if I actually had them or if I was doing it on purpose. I don't tell anyone any of this but I imagine myself having conversations where I do. I know theres a condition where people believe they have certain mental disorders but this isn't like that. I don't believe I have them I seem to want to have them for attention?? Maybe I'm just an attention seeker i dunno. I'm just really tired and i wanna know if there's something wrong or if i'm making it up. I also feel as if I can't tell my therapist any of this as that would confirm I'm just doing it for attention and trying to get a diagnosis from them.

Curvy and feeling terrible

replies: 4

Hi there, I’m a 21 year old Asian girl I’ve never been self conscious about my body even with the side comments and backhanded compliments from my Asian family all these years growing up. I have a very carefree personality so I drop it all, but recently I have gained weight in the pandemic. I used to be trimmer (never was skinny) but now I have a gut and flabby arms and I can’t seem to get it back to flat no matter how consistently I go to the gym. Admittedly, I do not have a strict training regime nor a strict diet but I have absolutely been watching what I eat. I look at myself every day in the mirror and think that no other 21 year old girl looks like this, especially no other Asian girl. Everything seems to sag and ooze and I just hate my body some days. I get upset with myself because I’m beginning to scrutinise other Asian women and feeling frustrated that they can wear shorts and skirts and baggy things and still look lovely. I don’t like the jealousy and defensiveness I’m now using to observe people. I would love to find a partner and a meaningful relationship but I keep thinking men will be put off when they see me in person. My previous partners have loved my body but it doesn’t stop these thoughts from consuming me. I keep telling myself men will only like slim women and that I just look disgusting in all my photos. My mother means well but sometimes I’ll show her who I’m chatting to, and she’ll say ‘oh he’s handsome, good that you have a month or so to lose a couple more kilos for your date’ and it just crushes me. My friends love me and genuinely think I look great, but I’m so conscious about being the one that sticks out because I’m bigger. I just know I’m bigger and I can’t find the confidence to be no matter how hard I try. Please will you tell me your personal stories if you can relate, and how I can overcome this?? How do I stop obsessing over this? I used to love my body but now I feel revolting and ugly, even though I am picking up healthier habits and physically feeling well. This is not how I thought my 20s would play out

My confusing Feelings on Dating and Relationships

replies: 16

(The Forum has helped with my stressed out feelings before so I thought I would make the use of it with another thing that has been on my mind) I’m 25 now and I haven’t been in a relationship before. After my parents divorced, I have been apprehensive about getting into any kind of relationship. My Mental Health is currently all over the place which I’m currently trying to fix. And I know I’m not in a hurry to get married or anything like that. I want to be able to be happy with myself and have my mental health all up to scratch. But why do I feel like I want to be with someone (a girl in my case) and have that close relationship? To be with someone who is like your best friend and so much more than that? To know what it’s like to kiss someone I really like? Why do these feelings keep coming up? I feel like any new person I meet that is a girl, a small part of me hopes a relationship could happen with this person I met. Like my mind is jumping ahead. I feel ridiculous!! I know being in a relationship doesn’t automatically solve any issue I have in my life. I also know it can come crashing down with divorce like my parents and so many other people. I feel like I’m so confused and I don’t know what I want. I would like to meet someone and develop a close relationship with them. But I also don’t want to rush into anything any time soon. I want to play it safe. I also feel like I’m not interesting enough and I don’t fit into the handsome guys and good lookers category. I had a few false starts where I thought I really like someone but it either didn’t feel right after a while or I got too picky or my mind couldn’t help looking ahead too far when I didn’t want to. There was one girl I liked who just my best friend now and I get along well with her Boyfriend really well too. We like a lot of the same things and I tried to ask her out but she didn’t feel the same way. It was crushing but I tried to not let it on that it hurt. We’re cool now and I’m happy we’re friends but it wasn’t easy getting over her at the time. And there hasn’t been anyone since then I have meet where I felt a strong connection with. So yeah, that sums up what I’m feeling in terms of dating as a whole. I felt like I just needed to get my feelings on the matter out in the open. I don’t know where I stand and why do I keep feeling like I want to be with someone when there’s no one there? Or at the very least, want to be in a close relationship?

Year 12 is killing me

replies: 5

Hi guys, it's been a while since I added a thread but I really need some help. I'm a year 12 student so I've got the HSC coming up and it is insane. I can't do any work because it's so overwhelming that I don't know where to start, but then I hate myself for not doing any work and my work accumulates which makes me more overwhelmed. To add to this, we are coming out of lockdown so everybody is socialising and having fun which reminds me of how alone I am because I don't get invited. Similarly, lots of people are discussing getting invited to formals and buying dresses which is another thing I can't relate to, making me feel even more isolated. It may be less than a month until the HSC but this is the most writing I have done in a long time. I haven't been eating at all (I don't have an eating disorder but I just forget and can't be bothered to get anything) and I haven't been getting to sleep until very late, then waking up around now (12pm). I know school is almost over and I should be able to get past these couple of months but it isn't shaping up too well for me. Not to mention the fact that I want to be a doctor which requires an insanely high ATAR and is super competitive. I've been told by lots of people that if I can't handle year 12 then there's no way I will survive med school which is another worry for me because that's all I really want to do. I'm feeling pretty overwhelmed, stressed and depressed. If anybody has any tips or motivation please let me know. Also, feel free to add your experiences of final exams to get some help too and make each other feel less alone. Thanks for listening!

Considering making a complaint about a mental health service I last attended

replies: 4

Last time I visited my psychiatrist was two weeks ago. I have contacted several times to report how unsafe I feel and how my mental health is gradually declining. Each time I call, they pick up, sigh and hang up. Repeat this process six or seven times in two weeks. I have sent out an email detailing my frustrations with my receptionists to call me. Anyways, the psychiatrist I went to was great and the receptionist were great. But the communication with receptionist has dissolved. I want to make a formal complaint against the clinic to the department of health but because I have an appointment on December, I am worried that the psychiatrist or receptionist has spread around the clinic that I am a drug seeker. When seeking ADHD treatment, if word gets out you are a drug seeker, all treatment is suspended. I am worried about unfair biases and retaliation if I do report the clinic. I have been diagnosed with ADHD, and treatment has not even begun yet. Horrific, the whole mental health system in Australia is embarassing. I have notified a health consumer helpline about my situation, and they say they have been swamped and won't look at my case until mid next year. It's ridiculous.

Anyone else here understand what life is like with autism?

replies: 14

Hi, Ill keep it short, im autistic im having trouble with some parts in my life Is anyone else here autistic and understands what im going through Socially, sorry

things have become overwhelming and it is a struggle to find peace of mind and find my place in life

replies: 31

Hello to anyone who reads this I am Daniel, I am 25 years old, single, work as a civil engineer, I am an active person. I have been feeling more and more overwhelmed with where my life is at and feel hopeless more and more. A trigger for this is feeling very alone even though I have a close family it is more in a social sense. I have a small network of friends and have tried my best to get out there and date but cannot seem to get anywhere past a second date with anyone and this is a trigger for the way I get down on myself and go into overdrive. It has started to become very overwhelming experienced and I am very flat and lacking in energy when usually I can muster up the energy to be a more jovial type, it has worn me down. My mind races about a lot of stupid things that I know in my head are silly but I cannot find a way to stop it and then I get down/angry at myself for being like this and it spirals from there. For example in a dating sense it might be if a girl all of sudden stops contacting me out of nowhere after a couple dates I immediately hypothesise the reasons behind this and what I did wrong, how I came across, does she think I'm weird, why does this happen to me everytime I meet someone etc. I am more a laid-back character, no fuss type and it makes me feel maybe I am not loud and out there enough for people. Another example is I begin to think because I come across relatively normal on social media and I only really have a small network of friends (like 2-3 very good friends and the rest are acquaintances from sporting clubs etc) that it makes me look undesirable, unpopular and uninteresting. I know I should not worry about what others think and particularly about things like that but it just finds a way to invade my headspace and I struggle to cope with it. When my head is constantly ticking over with thoughts like this I get exhausted and again angry at myself for not just being normal and relaxing in the moment, the enjoyment of my life has rapidly been fading. I feel worn down with the pressures of finding a partner who likes me for who I am and ending this feeling of being alone I guess I feel lost in who I am, confused in how to act and frustrated that I cannot find a way to just relax and be myself and not stress over things like social media perception, dating experiences that don't work and how many friends I do or don't have for example. Apologies for the confusing post, probably a representation of how my mind races Daniel

Overwhelming

replies: 5

Next year I will start year 11 and honestly I am very scared. I dropped out of high school 4 years ago so I’m a bit rusty. My anxiety is also off the roof. I am terrified and scared. Any tips to survive year 11? thanks

Eeep! When study is overwhelming! - Tips, ideas and coping strategies replies: 51

NEW TO THIS FORUM? Please read this first replies: 0

I Hate Being Myself and Want to Get Better. replies: 5

Dealing with deep thoughts and overthinking replies: 4

I think I actually am doing it for attention replies: 4

Curvy and feeling terrible replies: 4

My confusing Feelings on Dating and Relationships replies: 16

Year 12 is killing me replies: 5

Considering making a complaint about a mental health service I last attended replies: 4

Anyone else here understand what life is like with autism? replies: 14

things have become overwhelming and it is a struggle to find peace of mind and find my place in life replies: 31

Overwhelming replies: 5