Young people

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Eeep! When study is overwhelming! - Tips, ideas and coping strategies

replies: 51

Hi! Just thought I’d make a post with some tips for study. I know this is something we can all struggle with. These are all suggestions so feel free to take them or leave them! Hope they help! If you only remember one thing, let it be this: You are important. Your grades don’t define you. (support) Studying can feel isolating but know you’re not alone! Reach out – and find or make friends that can support you along the way. If you’re having trouble finding some friends, join some local communities or clubs! They have lots at Uni’s and even stuff like open days are great ways to meet new people and find out what’s happening. Study groups can also be a great way to meet people and stay motivated. Also remind yourself why you’re doing this; inspirational wallpapers or quotes can be super inspiring. Remember the saying about the oxygen mask? If you can’t take care of yourself first studying will be harder. You are important. You know the drill - water, food, exercise, sleep. Try to stay calm. Stuff that might be able to help include mindfulness, breathing exercises, colouring in, going for walks, journaling, listening to music… If you’re struggling – reach out. See a therapist. Talk to your student counsellor. If you need help, don’t be afraid to ask for it. Also lots of Universities and TAFE offer disability services – which includes conditions like Depression and Anxiety. (study) Find the right study space for you. Maybe that’s in your room, or a coffee shop, or the library. Some people find that noise helps; other people not so much. If you like particular kinds of noise, you can find ‘coffee shop’ noise or ‘rain sounds’ to help concentrate. Make a plan. It helps to do it often so it becomes a habit. Anytime you get a due date, write it down. Maybe you could use a diary, planner, bullet journal or an app. I find the 30/30 App helpful - study for a bit and then break for a bit. You can also get add-on’s for your computer to block sites like Facebook if you find them too distracting. Find out what study technique works for you. Do you like cue cards? Mind maps? Colour coding? Does highlighting stuff help you remember? Charts, maps, diagrams? Recorded lectures? Goals! These are so important – not just writing down deadlines but rewarding yourself for meeting them. Even making smaller goals like ‘read two pages from a textbook’ can help. Break it down into bite size pieces, and don’t forget to reward yourself after!

NEW TO THIS FORUM? Please read this first

replies: 0

The Young People space is a sub-forum within the wider Beyond Blue forum community. 1. Its purpose is to provide members aged 25 and under a space to discuss anxiety, depression and other related life issues. If you are aged over 25, please be mindful that this forum is a space for younger people to connect and provide peer support for each other. 2. Content from this sub-forum is displayed on both the beyondblue and youthbeyondblue websites. 3. Please bear in mind that some members find content relating to suicide and/or self-harm distressing or triggering. If you would like to post on these topics, please do so in our Suicidal Thoughts and Self Harm section. Please see also our guidelines for making posts on this topic. Posts made here in the Young People sub-forum containing content relating to suicide and/or self-harm will be moved. 4. These forums are moderated, so your posts may not appear straightaway. Information on how our system works can be found here. Being familiar with our community rules can help ensure that your posts appear online as quickly as possible. 5. This is a peer support community, and to get the best out of being here we recommend that you 'give support to receive support'. More on how that works here.

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Afraid and at a bit of a loss about the approaching adulthood.

replies: 2

I am turning 17 and in year 11, with just a year and a few months until I sit the HSC. It's almost amusing to think I used to be in a hurry to grow up into an adult as a child, and now wishing for the opposite. I guess it has never really occurred to me until recently just how short these 16 or so years have been. It won't be very long, then, until I'll have to enter the life of an adult. But I don't feel as if I'm ready to accept that. I don't have any goals or targets set in mind. I don't know what I want to do or who I want to become. I really don't hold any significant interest towards any uni courses. These few years I've pretty much sat idle and waited for time to pass. Then, I could make a decision once the time was right and such a moment for the decision to be made had reached me, not the other way around. This feels wrong. I'm studying and putting in a lot of effort, but to be honest, I don't even know who or what I'm studying for. Every time I get a good grading on my report or perhaps one of the better marks in the grade, these supposed successes feel so hollow. My school is competitive, and receiving an excellent mark will allow you to be liked and included. Perhaps I study because I just want to belong, or I'm just looking for something—anything—to do while I wait for the future. It certainly takes my mind off worrying. Underlying this sensation of worry is a layer of frustration. I've been thinking about what it is other students have and I don't, but I still don't know. They understand what kind of future path they wish to tread upon. They all seem so confident and free of doubt. A part of me admires it, but the other part can't bear to look because it always ends with me reminiscing over those worry-free childhood days I cannot return to. It feels bitter to compare then to now, but I cannot help remembering because I want to be reminded of that kind of halcyon. It's almost a sanctum to escape to . . . I wouldn't say I am so much sad or depressed that this is my predicament, but more along the lines of "at a loss." I don't really think I need to see a counsellor, because despite all that's said and done I am motivated to try and change things. I simply don't know how and that's why I am looking for advice. I wanted to seek help here because I'm sure plenty of people have made this journey and transition. How have you coped with the responsibilities and stresses of an adult? Did you encounter any obstacles or experiences like mine?

I think my ex left me because of depression- please help...

replies: 3

My boyfriend of 3 years broke up with me 2 months ago, saying he hadn't loved me for 4 months and was pretending to for my benefit, sleeping with me to 'keep up appearances'. Apparently after the breakup he struggled, but we would still talk and catch up, but he keeps changing-we'd see each other, the next day he would block me; we would catch up for coffees, next he'd say I wasnt over him and stop talking; I found out he was dating another girl (type he once hated) and I got mad (less than a month after the breakup and she was flirting before we brokeup), he told me I was out of line, but that night unblocked me. I thought he was just confused. Now, he is dating two girls (who work together), drinking, and shut me out completely.He's become everything he once hated. We both had a medical entry exam in March- one he has been trying hard to pass for the last 3 years, whereas I passed last year. Over the summer, he was consumed with revising (the exam was his reasoning for 'pretending' to love me). I know him, and I know it wasn't 'pretend'. If we hadn't seen each other, he'd beg to see me.He said sex was just part of the act, I know that isn't true-the week of the break up he was intimate/caring. The night of the exam, he left friends to see me (he asked me over), and he kept saying how happy he was with 'us'. 6 days later he broke it off. In the weeks prior, he said I didn't trust him/had trust issues (I raised concerns over the girl), or that I thought he was dumb. During the breakup, he said that I'll appreciate his 'act' when I'M in medicine (not us). During the breakup he looked physically hurt, despite him wanting to for months. His behavior changed very quickly from the night of the exam until the split. He is very proud, he wouldn't see exam stress may be a trigger for depression. I don't know what to do now; literally he changed in a week and for 2 months he's become opposite. If it is depression, then the man I love is still there and is struggling, but there's nothing I can do Yesterday we had a fight due to my frustration that he couldn't see how much he changed; that was the worst thing I could've done, and I'm going to reach out and apologize (if he'll acknowledge me). I am going to check in every 3-4 weeks and see how things go. He thinks his behavior is completely normal (couldn't be more opposite). I'm just hoping by letting him know I still care, family might raise their own concerns Anyone have anything similar/can shed some light?

Am I too anxious? Is it even anxiety?

replies: 6

Hi, I have always been a fairly anxious person but i never considered it that bad or a problem but people in my life say i'm extremely anxious. I cant actually tell when i'm anxious anymore its so normal but lately it has escalated and my family and my school councillor and my teachers are concerned. I don't know where to start so i'll list all my problems 1. I have an intense fear of dying most of my anxiety is related to health and dying iv always been a hypochondriac but its getting ridiculous ie. chest pain = Heart attack, Wont go in water since I found out about a rare bacteria that lives in water and eats your brain and only 4 people in the world have survived, cant drive because im to scared to get in the car in case I crash and die, plane going over the house at night = Bomb or danger, scared of the beach because I dont know whats in the water, If death is mentioned I automatically start thinking about how I will die and I cant stop it happening eventually and will start feel teary and panicky I have to get rid of the thought etc. I could go on forever. 2. I have a problem with spiders, I have a process I do every night regardless of consequences or circumstances that I do to ease anxiety and stop spiders getting into my room. I check the whole room with a torch, floor behind bed under bed behind photos i even check the celling, the window frame and behind the blind. I remove the mattress to check the bed frame for spiders then I shake out all my bedding and put it on the bed then I spray all entrances and exits to room with bug spray then i build a barrier under my door with multiple hoddies folded to make my door almost air tight so the spiders cant get in, every time I leave the room at night I will repeat this process, sometimes I do it just to check before I actually sleep. Some people think this is a bit ritualistic and becoming OCDish but I don't do it in a particular order and I only do it at mums house (at dadsI room check but dont put up the barrier. I sleep with a can of bug spray and a shoe to kill spiders 3. Not sure if its anxiety. I am academically inclined but I ask all my teacher for reassurance and will check and re check all aspects of the assignment with the teacher so I know iv done it correct and if i'm over the word count I cant cut it in case I cut something good and make it worse. I cant do the assignments by myself for fear of sucking or ruining my grade or getting it wrong Am I too anxious whats going on? Help?

Did getting diagnosed help or did it make it worse?

replies: 3

Hi everyone, I have this friend who feels she is suffering from depression. From research we have done she does tick most of the boxes which would label her depressed. I have suggested many times that she goes to a doctor to get checked out but I think she is scared. I was just wondering if you guys found that once you were clinically diagnosed as depressed did that help you or make it worse?

Well...I guess it's official

replies: 4

So, depression, anxiety, and I, are pretty officially married into an unhappy love triangle, worthy of any good teen romance. Some of you may have seen my thread a month or two ago, where I talked about physical symptoms I was experiencing and gave a little backstory. The update on that is that I finally plucked up the courage (and motivation) to go visit a GP. We talked for a bit, she gave me a questionnaire, which I thought was a weird method, but just glancing down the sheet I could tell the result wasn't going to be good. It was honestly amazing to see everything I was experiencing listed there in one place. Part of me still doesn't believe it. Throughout school, I was the person who laughed at PDHPE lessons about mental health. I'll never have those problems, I thought, wilfully ignoring my family history of depression. I'm way too mentally strong and capable. I know that mindset is dumb, but I still clung to it, because all throughout my life I've been the strong, sharp, brutally honest person who says it like it is. I remember a friend telling me "I feel like all the rest of us are struggling, and you're just fine. How do you do it?" Oh well, I guess karma had a role in all this...I was still too stubborn to accept a referral to a psychologist, but I feel like I've taken the first steps, at least. The poor GP had to explain several times that yes, depression/anxiety can cause xyz effects all by themselves, and that yes, it can come on suddenly for no apparent reason. My symptoms have been 80% physical, which is why nobody diagnosed it before. Whether that's because I didn't know what I was feeling, or whether I just blocked out my emotions entirely, I only experienced the physical side and it was rather horrible. Now I feel somewhat calmer. Still disappointed, because it's 'official', and I can't hide from it anymore...but at the same time, relieved because now I know what's wrong, I can work out how to face it. Thanks for sticking with this post. I needed to pour out today's experiences somewhere before I went to bed, and perhaps someone else reading this can relate. What were your thoughts when you were diagnosed?

First heart break in the gay world

replies: 2

Hey there guys , I'm only 19 and I'm dealing with a heart break no other ... my first love since coming out of the closet I had serious relationship with someone who was 27, 3 months into the relationship he asked me to move into his house, of course me being new to all of this dating world and living 2 hours away from him I did .. things were going great we worked out buts off , I managed to hold 2 jobs and paying him half my way towards his house loan, we have Thailand booked in 12 days for a holiday .. we planned that this year we'd move into a family memebers house save money and plan to buy another house in a few years ..; fash forward 8 months and he wants nothing to do with me .. he dumped me the morning after a night out clubbing .. he woke up and told me I wasn't what he needed anymore and he drove me to a train station and left me I took a 2 hour train ride home and I was devestated .. with only the back pack on ny back from the night before he blocked my numbers, social media and everything .. he has left me broken and numb ; I am dead set so empty inside... we went from a three bedroom home to now me sleeping on a mattress on the floor at my parents house ; even now he refuses to contact me and tells me he needs to get himself help. Me snd him were not perfect you guys but what we had was amazing when it was good .. he tells me i need to grow up , our age difference plays a big part .. he's not coping mentally with what ever he's going trough and that he needs time to work on himself ... my heart is destroyed because what happened to everything me and him had planned ? What happened to the promises he made about never giving up on us .. he promised to never just walk away from me and he did .. it's been nearly a week and I can't pull myself together ; I just want him back so badly and he has no idea how much he has destroyed me ... I worked 2 jobs for him , I changed my lifestyle for him and my friends .. I did everything he asked me to do in order to make him want this and he just threw me away like I'm a piece of rubbish ... I legit don't know how I'm gonna manage without him but I guess I have no choice ., he was my first love and my first everything ; I can't get the little things about him out of my head , like certain smells , certain memories of laughter and silliness or just our little cuddles I don't think I'll ever be happy again or find myself a true love .. and it's killing me holding this in .. please help me

Is this a normal symptom of panic disorder?

replies: 4

Hi all, I'm quite nervous to be posting for the first time but maybe others out there will know what I'm going through. I'm 18 and have had anxiety since I was very young with the occasional panic attack, but recently I've began to fear panicking itself and feel I've developed panic disorder. I know its not good to self-diagnose and I have already planned to get help, however in the meantime I'm finding it difficult to remind myself that I am not the only one experiencing this and it seems the more people i tell- though they are close friends and don't get told all the details- the worse I feel. Recently its taken less to set off a panic attack- for example, knowing I'm about to go on a date and that my date could arrive at any second- and lately I've made myself anxious to the point I've thrown up. Needless to say I cancelled the date and really want to avoid the next one at all costs. I know this isn't a good coping mechanism but right now it would feel so good to not leave the house for a while. I hate that I am letting my anxiety get to me when I should be so used to coping but I'm feeling very embarrassed about my new symptom and can't make plans without considering that it may happen again and perhaps this time in front of someone. My fears right now are that I will never get over this and eventually won't be able to leave the house, or that I'm going to embarrass myself. It's been very difficult for me to post this, but I'm sure everyone has felt the same. Your replies mean a lot to me, so thank you

Unsure if depressed

replies: 1

I've recently started full time work, and over the last year and a bit have felt almost continuously stressed, upset and thinking I'm a failure. When I picture the future, it's hard to see past my current stresses and the idea that this career just isn't for me (either because it's not fulfilling or I'm just plain not good enough). I have definitely felt happy in this time. I have also slowly lost interest in doing things. To some extent, despite it stressing me out, I wanted to fill my evenings with work because I wouldn't know what else to do. I'll get home, have a nap because of exhaustion, and spend the rest of my nights waiting to go to bed, often spending time in between wasting time because books, tv and other tasks don't interest me. This has bothered me, but aside from increased stress, those are things I've experienced for periods of time before. I think with the new stresses, it's more noticeable. In the past month, I've also been plagued with frequent headaches and feel constantly irritated, which gets me down, and I find it hard to get up in the morning. The day feels like a write off from the get go. I'm also forgetful and can't concentrate (technology is a far easier occupier than conversations or tv etc) In addition, I feel acutely aware of relationship issues I have with my family (we are quite distant). I feel extremely guilty that I'm just not a good enough family member, and that this is my doing. I want to enjoy life, and I feel as if I'm trying very hard, but keep having a door closed on me. I worry about going to the GP and being suggested to that I am just being lazy, or making a big deal out of nothing. I've had people who have had depression say much to the same effect.

I can't deal with my depression

replies: 6

My entire self is consumed by depression. Every thought I have makes me want to cry, I'm so stuck and I desperately need a distraction. I don't know what to do.

My social life is almost dead

replies: 7

Hi, So I've been out of uni for 18 months with a great job but I feel like my job is the only worthwhile thing in my life. My friends are dwindling and I seem to have to work so much harder to make new friends in a new town. Like I have to pretend to be someone else. I have always been a shy sort of person who gets anxious talking to people but in the last maybe 3 years I had gained a lot more confidence and starting going out and doing things I wanted to like parties and the local horse racing days or just to the pub on a weekend with friends. I stopped being so self conscious and really worked hard on being more confident. Fake it till you make it does work! But now I have moved away and only made 1 friend in 18 months. I have no one to go out with anymore. I'm too scared to go out on a weekend on my own without friends. There are people I have tried to get to know but I feel like they are not interested in me because I am not interesting enough because I have no life because I have no friends. I see photos on facebook or snapchat of people I know going to events or night outs and I just can't help but burst out crying... I feel so excluded. I now feel really unattractive because I am really skinny, always have been, and I have lost my confidence because I feel like my life sucks. I keep completely giving up on finding a girl because even I don't like me, how could I ever find someone else who finds me attractive, inside or out? I'm a genuine, nice and caring person but I think no one can see it because I just don't have the energy anymore to care This has taken me ages to come out, I'm just so embarrassed but I feel so lost. I just physically can't tell anyone close to me in person and I'm sick of putting on the brave face. Thanks

Eeep! When study is overwhelming! - Tips, ideas and coping strategies replies: 51

NEW TO THIS FORUM? Please read this first replies: 0

Afraid and at a bit of a loss about the approaching adulthood. replies: 2

I think my ex left me because of depression- please help... replies: 3

Am I too anxious? Is it even anxiety? replies: 6

Did getting diagnosed help or did it make it worse? replies: 3

Well...I guess it's official replies: 4

First heart break in the gay world replies: 2

Is this a normal symptom of panic disorder? replies: 4

Unsure if depressed replies: 1

I can't deal with my depression replies: 6

My social life is almost dead replies: 7