Young people

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Eeep! When study is overwhelming! - Tips, ideas and coping strategies

replies: 51

Hi! Just thought I’d make a post with some tips for study. I know this is something we can all struggle with. These are all suggestions so feel free to take them or leave them! Hope they help! If you only remember one thing, let it be this: You are important. Your grades don’t define you. (support) Studying can feel isolating but know you’re not alone! Reach out – and find or make friends that can support you along the way. If you’re having trouble finding some friends, join some local communities or clubs! They have lots at Uni’s and even stuff like open days are great ways to meet new people and find out what’s happening. Study groups can also be a great way to meet people and stay motivated. Also remind yourself why you’re doing this; inspirational wallpapers or quotes can be super inspiring. Remember the saying about the oxygen mask? If you can’t take care of yourself first studying will be harder. You are important. You know the drill - water, food, exercise, sleep. Try to stay calm. Stuff that might be able to help include mindfulness, breathing exercises, colouring in, going for walks, journaling, listening to music… If you’re struggling – reach out. See a therapist. Talk to your student counsellor. If you need help, don’t be afraid to ask for it. Also lots of Universities and TAFE offer disability services – which includes conditions like Depression and Anxiety. (study) Find the right study space for you. Maybe that’s in your room, or a coffee shop, or the library. Some people find that noise helps; other people not so much. If you like particular kinds of noise, you can find ‘coffee shop’ noise or ‘rain sounds’ to help concentrate. Make a plan. It helps to do it often so it becomes a habit. Anytime you get a due date, write it down. Maybe you could use a diary, planner, bullet journal or an app. I find the 30/30 App helpful - study for a bit and then break for a bit. You can also get add-on’s for your computer to block sites like Facebook if you find them too distracting. Find out what study technique works for you. Do you like cue cards? Mind maps? Colour coding? Does highlighting stuff help you remember? Charts, maps, diagrams? Recorded lectures? Goals! These are so important – not just writing down deadlines but rewarding yourself for meeting them. Even making smaller goals like ‘read two pages from a textbook’ can help. Break it down into bite size pieces, and don’t forget to reward yourself after!

NEW TO THIS FORUM? Please read this first

replies: 0

The Young People space is a sub-forum within the wider Beyond Blue forum community. 1. Its purpose is to provide members aged 25 and under a space to discuss anxiety, depression and other related life issues. If you are aged over 25, please be mindful that this forum is a space for younger people to connect and provide peer support for each other. 2. Content from this sub-forum is displayed on both the beyondblue and youthbeyondblue websites. 3. Please bear in mind that some members find content relating to suicide and/or self-harm distressing or triggering. If you would like to post on these topics, please do so in our Suicidal Thoughts and Self Harm section. Please see also our guidelines for making posts on this topic. Posts made here in the Young People sub-forum containing content relating to suicide and/or self-harm will be moved. 4. These forums are moderated, so your posts may not appear straightaway. Information on how our system works can be found here. Being familiar with our community rules can help ensure that your posts appear online as quickly as possible. 5. This is a peer support community, and to get the best out of being here we recommend that you 'give support to receive support'. More on how that works here.

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Getting into trouble at school and ways to cope

replies: 1

Hi, my name is Yutong and I am currently in my first year of high school. There are many fun things about attending school, but there are also upsetting situation like getting into trouble for almost no reason at all. Just this morning my Year Level Leader called me out of class for a meeting. She said that I was going to give a one-day-suspension. The reason traces back to last week. On the balcony, some moron pushed me and I dropped my books. They fell down the balcony and hit a yard-duty-teacher in the head. That was classified as disrespect towards staff. My parents and my Homegroup teacher were contacted so basically everyone knows about it now. Because of that, I cried all afternoon. Luckily, I have ways to cope with situations like this. You can try some of them too! 1. Be honest. In most cases teachers can tell if you are lying or not. If somebody has evidence of you committing something, that is not a good time to lie. Being honest actually decreases your chance of getting into trouble.2. Learn to apologise. In most situations teachers will appreciate your apology as long as the incident isn't that serious. Display your apology towards teachers, even if you are not sorry.3. Communicate. If you come across to a scenario where you get wrongly accused, make sure you talk to someone about the reality of the situation. However, make sure you talk camly because talking in a panicking way makes you seem more suspicious.4. Stay calm. It is humiliating to cry in front of a teacher, but sometimes it can't be helped. I understand that crying is natural, and so is panicking, but they are not the best solutions because they can only make you feel worse that you already are. 5. Behave in school. After you get into trouble at school try and focus in class because that reduces your risk of being into trouble again. Your teacher will continue to see you as a good student. I hope these following solutions listed up here works for you. Remember, nobody is perfect, and they have all got into some sort of trouble before at some point. Even if you keep getting into trouble and/or is at rist of expulsion, start behaving in class. Don't worry if teachers hate you - every cloud has a silver lining, and if you try hard enough, there is a chance you could attract your teacher. And thank you for reading, have a nice day!

Why do I hate my friends?

replies: 4

Hello, in the past year or so I have been struggling with some hatred issues I have. Whenever someone slightly annoys me I get really mad to the point where I ignore them for an entire day. It's been happening with everyone, my parents, my friends. I don't want to feel like this. I really can't remember what it's like to be able to actually have fun making fun of myself with my friends without feeling that overwhelming hatred. I have fights with my mum almost everyday. I don't want to fight but I can't seem to keep my mouth shut because I just can't let someone like her get the last word. I hate my mum, I feel so bad for it too because she has never done anything wrong. I just started hating her and I don't know why. No one has done anything wrong to me. The worst part is that I know if I keep this up then they'll all leave me. I'm terrified of them leaving me, I really can't live without my friends or parents and them leaving me is my biggest fear. But I treat them so badly and I don't know what to do.

Feeling disconnected with my elder kid

replies: 3

I had surgery recently and the recovery period was 6 weeks, which I just completed. I have two kids, aged 8 and 3. Due to recovery period after surgery I wasn't able to do a lot of stuff with my kids, which was very normal on daily basis. They asked for me and took care of me for first week. Since then they are going away and I feel like they dont need me at all now. I want them to want me but not with force. Everytime I share this concern with my husband, he tries to support but he end up saying I'm worrying for no reason. I also feel my husband is too much into kids and I'm not getting much opportunity with them. He is everywhere where kids are. And to be with kids, he end up not doing housework. And I end up doing all house work. When I raise this with him, he tells me that I'm workholic and makes up unnecessary work in house. And its my choice to do house work. He laughs at me if I use wrong english and then says sorry I wasn't able to control. This is not the first time, I'm feeling like that. When my second kid was born I felt distant with my elder one. When I raised this with my husband that I'm not here to just do the work. He tried to support and then we had huge fight because he said that because of my insecurities, I have ruined his relationship with elder kid. We tried to fix things and it was fine for a while. But it all started again after my current surgery. And I feel I'm loosing connection with both my kids. Am I wrong in feeling all this?

Am I worthless

replies: 9

I feel as if I’m not important, or not needed, I have a large friendship group(so everyone will be fine without me) and I’m Aromantic so it’s not like I have a soal mate out there, if my family was dead, not that I want that, but if I didn’t have them, i would feel nothing holding me back from dying, my friends try to tell me that they need me, but I just don’t know what to think, I…

Serious concerns with uni, and Ive completely run out of who to turn to. advice needed!

replies: 1

Currently at uni in melbourne (no, its not the university of melb.) and had my second essay flagged and investigated for plagiarism.this was for a compulsory subject that every student at that uni has to do. i knew nothing about the stuff other than what I was taught in the lessons. i have also been going through various financial issues and spent a lot of time working, when the essay was due, i put some of my notes into the essay cause I know they were relevant, but little time was taken to paraphrase.only 17% of what i wrote was matched as "copying" but its still being investigate, this has gone on for 3 weeks! I've spoken to teacher, student help, student "advocacy", pers, etc. I will add, when u email student help services, it can take them over 48 business hours to reply!For me, this is an extremely serious matter because it is my last semester of my bachelors degree, and I've worked so hard to get where I am. I cannot repeat this unit! Ive also come from an interesting home life, and that's never helped with my studies. finishing this degree means I can move on to the next stuff, i cannot face the outrage that can come from parents etc as i still live at home. no one can hide a tertiary fail at the end of a course.I've never had a plagiarism investigation before and I've got no where left for advice or guidance. idk if i wanted to vent or hear from someone that has had a similar issue. i know i deserve a penalty for my wrong doing, but I know its not an F.please be respectful with your comments. i don't need more slander, I'm beating myself up enough already. please avoid commenting "who cares what your parents think" because that is a separate issue.

My anxiety won't let me go to school anymore and I don't know what to do.

replies: 4

I'm currently in grade 10 and my anxiety has been getting worse since grade 7. When I'm in class I feel like I can't breathe and like everyone is staring at me and I end up leaving halfway through. It started with just skipping acouple classes and now I'm only attending school around 2 days a week. My parents hate me for it and I can't explain it to them because they don't believe a young person can have anxiety or depression. Because of this I've become extremely depressed and don't want to get out of bed anymore and I have no motivation for anything, which has only made them even more angry at me. I've explained this to my school multiple times but they've done nothing to help. I've tried going to headspace but it did nothing for me. I want to get better but I'm starting to feel like that will never happen.

What it feels like to be 'hated'

replies: 2

My name is Yutong, and I am in year 7. I am writing this post while bored in a Geography lesson and when my friends are talking, laughing, and discussing things together without me. Earlier during this lesson one of the borrowed a sharpener and pencil and broke them. That really infuriated me. That is it. They literallly depended on my stationery, and targeted my when borrowing things. Enough is enough. If this was the first time someone borrowed my things and broke them, I wouldn't be that mad. But when I saw my broken sharpener and pencils, my blood pressure increased, and I felt really mad. I threw my pencil case onto the ground and said that I swear for my life that I will never bring my pencil case to school again. But my friends just had a good chortle and asked me to give it to them if I didn't want it.At the start of this lesson one of my friends asked my other friends to go to the bathroom together. She asked everyone BUT me. They left without even looking at me. After they came back, they conntinued discussing about their work. I tried to ask them to join in, but they pretended that I was invisible. After less than three minutes they finished the task becasue they were helping each other (many hands make light work), and they went to the teacher. My teacher praised them and gave them a certificate for working together well as I watched them sadly. And when my teacher asked why I didn't finish my work, I told her my whole story. My teacher didn't help me, and gave me a lunchtime detention.I already have some mild COVID-19 symptoms. All of this just made them worse, and I now feel more sick than ever. I tried to message my mum, but my phone went flat. Suddenly I feel like that I was rejected by the whole world. I opened Kids Helpline for some advice but to my shock and anger our school had blocked it. Are there any other places where I can get help from at school?Anyway, thank you for reading!

I have no friends and I am so depressed

replies: 3

I have no friends and I am so depressed. I am angry all the time and have no energy. Nothing I do makes me happy. My family all hate each other and I am dealing with the mother of my stepson who hates me because she wants me to assist in financially supporting her child. I feel like I need help but, because of what I do as a job, I know that I am not as mentally ill as a lot if other people. And because of that, I know that I don't have entitlements for support. My gp just wants to pump me with drugs. I want to see a psych but, I can't afford it. I know there is Medicare but, the waiting list is massive because of covid and I will have to wait months for an appointment. I feel like I need to be admitted to a psych ward but, yet again I cannot afford it and I am not a high enough risk to the government to be put into a public system. I also am scared to tell my family what is really going on because, I feel I have to be the strong one of the family. I am so lonely and I don't know what to do. Do I just wait until I fully snap and there is no other option but, to go to hospital?

Why am I always the one who gets treated badly?!

replies: 1

My name is Yutong, and I am in year 7. I am diagnosed with severe depression, and due to the situations at school I don't really think I am managing it well.Because of the annoying COVID-19 pandemic, we all have to wear masks at school. I am very self conscious about my face, so I never take my mask of. So now most people see me as a strange girl. And because nobody likes seeing strange people being near them, nearly all the girls in my year level started to be mean to me. Just last Tuesday I said hello to a Tik Toker from my year level online, but the reply I got back was: 'no i know u and u r not very nice to people. i have been told about ur rudeness to other students and i will not tolerate it!' Because that person's username isn't their real name, and they never share videos, I will count them as an anonymous user. Their gender is unknown, but by the look of the reply I am pretty certain that they could be a girl.That online rudeness wasn't all. Today at school, I unmuted my phone and took a screenshot of my timetable, but my phone made a 'click' noise as though I just took a picture. My friends heard it, and they thought I was taking photos of them. Immediately they snatched my phone and ran away with it so I couldn't access my camera anymore. I tried to get them to give back my phone, but they just passed it around to each other, making sure I wouldn't take it }:( They somehow unlocked my phone, and opened Microsoft OneNote, where it has all my secrets written. They examined my secret information, memorised them, wrote them on a paper plane, and threw it across the class. A girl opened it, read my secrets, and found out that I had a crush on my teacher. She yelled it out to the class, and everybody lhad a good chortle. My friends seemed to be enjoying themselves, but I felt humiliated. Later that day in Science my friends went out of class to hang out at the toilets, but they didn't invite me. They just left the classroom without even looking at me. That moment I froze, suddenly. I found out that my friends didn't care about me, only themselves. When I thought about the situations after school today I was INFURIATED. Immediately I opened my laptop and started to write this story while crying. Reflecting on paragraph 3, I admit that I may be rude sometimes, but that's because I am having difficulty managing my depression. Are there any ways to cope? Anyway, thank you for reading.

Why do good people get treated the worst?

replies: 18

I am tired. I'm tired of being shat on by people. This has happened my entire life, and I can't figure out why. I am a GOOD person, and I am loyal, and have an extremely good heart, especially given all of the crap i've had to go through and deal with my whole life. It's like people can see that you're a good person, and they just suck all of the life from you, and break off the rest of the heart you have left in you, piece by piece, until there's nothing left of you as a person. Every time I let someone into my life, and show them the love I have to offer, they either abuse that, use me, hurt me, stab me in the back, betray me, or just piss off with no explanation (or all of the above). It makes me not want to be a good person anymore, because at the end of the day, what's the point when you keep getting broken down constantly?... I'm hurting. I'm tired. I'm close to being done. I am a strong person, and am grateful for how far I have come, and being able to live through all of the traumatic events I have had thrown upon me. But I am just over it.

Eeep! When study is overwhelming! - Tips, ideas and coping strategies replies: 51

NEW TO THIS FORUM? Please read this first replies: 0

Getting into trouble at school and ways to cope replies: 1

Why do I hate my friends? replies: 4

Feeling disconnected with my elder kid replies: 3

Am I worthless replies: 9

Serious concerns with uni, and Ive completely run out of who to turn to. advice needed! replies: 1

My anxiety won't let me go to school anymore and I don't know what to do. replies: 4

What it feels like to be 'hated' replies: 2

I have no friends and I am so depressed replies: 3

Why am I always the one who gets treated badly?! replies: 1

Why do good people get treated the worst? replies: 18