dear Rosie, it doesn't matter how much you have in life, because this will never stop you from getting depression, you could have won the first prize in a lotto, have a great family, lots of friends, great kids and perfect job, this doesn't matter, because depression is much too strong and will weave itself onto you and start to begin your downward spiral.
I can't comment on whether it's menopause, because my wife had divorced me before this happened, so I haven't had any experience, although I do know people who have one through it, but haven't lived with anybody.
When you see your doctor just raise your concern about putting on weight, as this always seems to be a huge problem with some antidepressants (AD) and it's something that these drug companies need to look at, because if their drug does this then they won't have anybody taking them.
Also ask your doctor about the 'mental health plan' where you can get 10 free visits to see a psychologist, which could give your husband a rest, and I don't mean any harm in saying this, but after awhile they get tired and eventually switch off. L Geoff. x